My dog's died and I'm really struggling

[failingfast]

Sorry for the depressing post. My little dog died suddenly last week; she was only 8 years old.

I'm struggling to come to terms with it and I'm dogged by feelings of guilt. She was hugely loved, and well looked after, but it's silly things I'm upset about I suppose. Things like, whenever we all went out and left her in the house, she'd be left in the kitchen, rather than being able to have full run of the house. I see my neighbour's little doggie at the front window all the time when he's left alone and I just think to myself, why didn't I let her do that? Why did I confine her to the kitchen?

Same thing at night. She always looked so sad when I put her in the kitchen for bed. I think about her alone in the dark. Why didn't I just let her sleep with us in the bedroom? I'd give anything to feel her little body next to me on the bed now. I just feel l ike I messed up. She had such a short little life and it feels like she spent so much of it alone.

I just want her back. I'd do it all differently

So sorry for your lossit is natural to grieve for a good friend and companion but you sound as if you gave her a lovely life and she was clearly much loved.Don't torture yourself with what ifs and maybes ,our dog is confined to kitchen if we are out and sleeps there at night ,I would worry about his safety in the day if he could roam the house and I know he is happy and healthy.

I will give Otto an extra big hug tonight though

Im really sorry to hear about your dog
Please don't be full of guilt
I think a putting her in the kitchen was fine, I bet she felt safe and secure in her own little place
Please keep in mind she knows you loved her and there will come a time when you can smile at the happy memories you had
Take care

I'm so sorry about your dog

I will be gutted when our little dog goes, I love her more than I love 99% of the human beings I know.

If it helps at all - if your dog was unhappy with her lot, she would have let you know. We used to keep our dog crated when we went out until our neighbours told us she used to bark the whole time she was gone. She sits in the front window now watching the world go by whenever we go out. But only because we knew that's what she needed. If your dog wasn't happy in the kitchen in the day and at night, you would have known about it and done something else.

I bet she had a lovely home with you and that you were her whole world xx

Thanks for your kind response. That's just what my dh says; that she was safe in the kitchen and it's what she knew. She also had random (albeit infrequent) episodes of diarrhoea at times, so it was certainly better for us for that to be confined to one space!

I loved her so so much. I can't believe she's gone. I just hope she had a happy life. We had her before we had children and I do feel like she was sidelined somewhat when the children came along, but I think she still had a good life. She was walked, played with and had wonderful holidays.

I never expected to lose her so soon; I thought we had years left with her. I suppose you just never know the minute. I ought to be taking heed of that an making the most of life with those most precious to me, but instead I'm living in the past with a head full of regrets.

I suppose it's still early days. She only died just over a week ago. She was so beautiful.

Thank you all. I hope you're right; I'm sure you are.

And yes, I'm sure she would have let us know if she was unhappy!

I can't believe how hard it's hit me. I never grew up with dogs, it was my dh who wanted us to get one as he had dogs when he was young. I never realised how attached I'd become and how difficult it would be to say goodbye.

Thanks for your kind responses; you've helped me a lot xx

My dog lives in the kitchen, he isn't allowed in the rest of the house, which is up the stairs. The door is not closed, he just knows he can't go up. He is very happy.

Don't beat yourself up about this. Your dog was loved. That is the important thing. If you want to know about a sad dog, find the thread posted by the MNetter in Canada with the collie next door .

Tell us about your dog. What breed was she?

:( so sorry for your loss. xx

Our little dog died 5 years ago - it still hurts but not as much- we donated his bed, crate etc to a dog rescue centre. Someday we hope to get another. Your dog sounds much loved.

She was very loved by an awful lot of people.

She was a jrt crossbreed. We don't know what she was crossed with, my dh always suspected it was a collie because of the way she 'weaved' as she was walking. She was kind and gentle and liked nothing more than just being with the pack.

For the last few years she actually lived mostly with my parents; something else I feel guilty about! She went there when my ds was about 1. My dh works away so from about 6 o'clock in the evening we were all stuck in the house, I couldn't take her for her much loved evening walks. My parents are retired so she had a wonderful time with them and they showered her with love. We looked after her if they went away and we visited all they time (they live locally).

She grew up really close to my ds; they absolutely adored each other. He didn't fuss her or get in her face and annoy her - they'd just sit together calmly watching television and having cuddles. She always made a bee-line for him.

She was just the most wonderful, loving dog.

We're donating her bed and a few of her things, but we've kept her favourite toys which still smell of her . I've just started sponsoring a dog with the Dogs Trust. We certainly won't be rushing into replacing her at the moment as we're still in the same position wrt dh's work. I hope in the future when the kids are a bit older we might be in a position to re-home a dog. I don't know if my parents will get another one; they never wanted a dog in the first place but, alas, they fell for her charms and they're really feeling it now she's gone. It's amazing what a difference a dog can make to a family home. They're like angels with waggy tails

So sorry you lost her so young. Be glad for all the good times you gave her and she gave you. Sponsoring a dog is a lovely thing to do.

Sorry to hear your sad news. I hope you're feeling a little better now. You shouldn't feel guilty, sounds like she had a lovely life. The pain does fade in time, you'll still cry in a year's time but less often than you do now. I think it's worse when they die young, you feel 'cheated' (know how you feel as I lost my six year old suddenly last year). x