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Feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

7 replies

DaisyheadMayzie · 27/03/2012 02:14

We have a 14 month old golden retriever. She is a lovely dog. She is good with the children, loves the cats, has retrieved the chickens without killing them, has good social skills with other dogs and isn't too bouncy with strangers. But in general living terms we are really struggling. Well, DH is really struggling and it's driving me mad. He isn't a dog person and although it was his idea to get the dog, I realise now I should have said no.

We live in rural NZ. We have a couple of acres of land which should be heaven for a dog. It is heaven for her, but her escaping has reached the point where she has to be on long lead outside. Recall is good when she is focused on me (ie whilst training) and she's pretty good when we're out, but when she escapes she won't come home until she's ready. Our property is fenced but it's wire fencing and she squeezes under/through. We will be moving in 6 months so chicken wiring the whole property is not feasible, and our layout means fencing a small area is not easy either.

She has a compulsion to roll - in poo, dead things, things she has stolen or been given, muddy puddles, an effluent run off she has found somewhere on the neighbouring farm. So I am forever hosing her and bathing her and even then she often stinks. If she goes further afield where the neighbours don't know her, she could get shot - farmers don't like dogs on their property.

DH is a kiwi and grew up on a farm - for him, dogs should be outside. Before we got Maisie we discussed that for me, dogs are part of the family and do come in the house and he appeared to understand, but he is finding it so difficult. Given her absconding, she either has to be outside on a lead or inside with the doors closed, so he frequently complains about the house smelling of dog (I don't notice it) and she is digging up the lawn (bored on the lead no doubt). The sniping from him is getting worse, because every day she does something else naughty. I came home this morning after school drop off (max 1/2 an hour on her own) and she has chewed up a very obvious corner of the skirting board.

Walking her isn't that easy. I take her for a lead walk down the road, which isn't ideal as it's a winding country road, and usually twice a week I'll drive her into town for an off lead walk at the dog park. Also twice a week she spends some time with her sister who my parents have. Exercise makes no difference to the running away - I have let her into the house after a lovely long walk and she has run straight through the house and out of another door and buggered off for an hour. I thought we'd be able to exercise her on our property some of the time - throw balls, etc - but she runs off after a couple of throws.

This isn't how I envisaged dog ownership. It's so much harder in the country than the town. I'm not even sure what I'm asking, just some tips on making life easier, or dealing with DH who hasn't bonded with Maisie at all, or even just reassurance that her behaviour will improve after adolescence. We have been to dog training classes, which she was very good at, and I am considering getting a trainer to come to the house but don't know if it'll work - any thoughts on that? And be gentle with me - I'm asking for help!!

OP posts:
AllergicToNutters · 27/03/2012 08:27

noone helped yet? I am sure someone will come along to offer some sound advice soon [smile

noinspiration · 27/03/2012 09:31

In an ideal world you should try to improve her recall through positive reward based training, however you are currently stuck in a position where your dog can and does run off, and is at risk of being shot. My neighbours are in a similar position with their dog, and they solved the problem by using a special collar which gives a small shock when the dog crosses the property boundary. The dog learned very quickly and they no longer need to use the collar.

I do not use collars like this myself, and will be flamed for suggesting it, BUT as your dog is not nervous, and is at risk of being shot, it might be a solution. My neighbours dog is as happy and bouncy as he has always been, is not traumatised in anyway, and is safe in the garden rather than dead in a sheep field. This has got to be an improvement. They tried reward based training too, but unfortunately found liver treats had nothing on sheep chasing.

ohbugrit · 27/03/2012 09:42

Very briefly (not meaning to be curt but I have to go in a minute) she's not getting nearly enough exercise and stimulation so she's taking herself off to find some for herself, simply because she can. You need to get her recall perfect before allowing her free reign again and you need a crate for the house and you need to give her much more proper exercise one way or another. IMO. Sorry I have to go, will come back but am sure you will get more help soon :)

DaisyheadMayzie · 27/03/2012 09:57

Thanks to those who have replied so far. I am off to bed so don't want you to think I'm not returning! I have considered the electric collar set up but have been a bit squeamish about it. I think I have a townie mentality whilst living in the country. Of course it is preferable to being shot and maybe it is something that needs to be considered more seriously.

Regarding exercise, how much does she need? At the moment she gets one 'outing' a day, be it gallavanting in the dog park, on a lead walk for an hour or a day with her sister. I can't feasibly drive her into town every day for a dog park frolic (10 miles), nor can I drive her to my parents every day, so some days she has to be walked down the road. My mum's dog (her litter mate) gets fewer outings as she gets car sick, but she enjoys her country life, runs in the paddocks, follows the cat and lives life as I expected it would be with Maisie, except I have the naughty one who escapes at every opportunity and can't even be out with me hanging the washing out without buggering off. What do other country folk do with their dogs?

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daisydotandgertie · 27/03/2012 10:57

It does sound as though her bond with you and your family isn't yet strong enough tbh. And obviously her discipline is a bit off the mark.

How much time do you actually spend with her - building a bond with her by training and playing?

Do you know where she goes to when she escapes? Is there a favourite place or people? What about seasons and so on - has she been spayed yet?

Have you already tried to teach her not to head towards the fence?

Does she know 'no' or 'leave it'? And does she obey those commands without fail?

I am very rural with dogs and IMO, the space doesn't mean we're off the hook with dog interaction or training. They need even more of it than normal. The freedom they have is mammoth and there are many, many things which are far more exciting than we are. We've had to work hard with them to build a strong bond so they want to be with us.

Can you spend an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon for a week or two with her on a long, long, long very light line - getting on top of her recall and the no command?

Every time she heads for the fence, a stern no and a check on the line. Teach her that she is not to go to the fence, far less through it.

She will be a very bright dog - and will probably respond well to some homemade liver cake treats (google them).

minimuu · 27/03/2012 13:29

I don't think your bond is the issue, or that she is bored. She is just a young dog surrounded by a large amount of countryside, smell and just wants to be out in it - like 98% of all dogs.

I can see how you are in a bit of circle and can not seem to see the way out. It is simple (says the women not in the situation!)

I would try really hard to fence off a small area where she can sit and chill outside (to be honest bugger the expense 6 months is a long time if you are stressed and always looking out for the dog) If you could have a small safe area where she could be left to relax and you could relax that would help a lot - I did read that this may be hard but if it really is impossible then do put her on a long line (as long as it is safe etc and attached to a harnass).

Do use your lovely acreage to exercise her - is it suitable for walking, chasing running away from her, playing tuggy, hiding toys, food etc? I think probably doing this twice a day for half an hour is better than once a day for an hour.

There is a solution but I can see at the moment that you are bogged down with the problems. I always block off my land to my dogs, the puppies only get a very small area to explore and the bigger dogs have to learn to behave before they get the free run of our paddocks etc. I

DaisyheadMayzie · 28/03/2012 00:09

Daisy - lot of questions, I am around her a lot of the time but don't spend that much time actively training or playing. Training in 10 minute bursts a couple of times a day perhaps, playing off and on through the day - throw the ball a bit, play with her tug toy, rough and tumble play a bit. She escapes through the boundary fence on either side of our block - one side is a small block like us, the other side is a rough farm with lots of poo around, and lots of different animals. She goes to eat and roll in the poo, although will bark at the animals too. She was spayed a couple of months ago, later than planned as she had her first season really early and her absconding has got worse since she was spayed. As soon as she gets the idea to run away, she will not obey me - I see her heading off towards the fence but she won't come back. Sometimes she stops and looks at me, but decides to carry on. She is getting better at 'No' and can generally obey that in the house (I use it if she has stolen something - she is a terrible thief too). Outside, not so good. I have just got a very very long lead, so will start using that to improve the recall. I don't have two hours a day to spend on it though...

Minimuu - I think you're right that she has a lot of more interesting options than me where we live. Not sure liver cake beats rolling in a steaming cow pat. Fencing a small area isn't easy due to the landscaping more than the cost. The only place that we could fence without doing a huge perimeter is around the side of the house and that is quite a way from the living area which is where she wants to be - I think she'll just try and try to escape, and I don't want her to work out how to jump fences or dig under (at the moment she just squeezes - it's amazing the small space she can get through). I have just got a really long lead and that works well to give her a bit more freedom. Our block is suitable for exercising her and I got the long lead with the intention of using it when we play ball.

When I came out of the shower this morning, she had had another go at the skirting board - really, I was away for 15 minutes, the kids were getting ready for school, there was no need for her to be bored or whatever her problem is. Someone mentioned a crate - do people really keep their dogs in crates whenever they are out of the room?

Anyway, thanks for your ideas and comments. I am starting to get really stressed with her.

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