Earning respect from my dog - would appreciate some help.

[CakeMeIAmYours]

I have an 11 month old labradoodle who is at best 'spirited' but tbh, is quite badly behaved. I accept that this is my responsibility, but I'm just not sure what to do with him.

His recall is actually not too bad, I'd say he will return to me immediately at least 90% of the time (with a whistle and for a treat), but he has recently taken to returning to me, taking the treat I am proffering, and then running back to whatever person/dog I was calling him away from.

The 10% of the time that he ignores me is invariably when he has run up to a child or someone who doesn't like dogs - I feel dreadful about this and really want to remedy it.

He jumps up at people, and, because he resembles a fluffy teddy bear, people tend to cuddle him and make a fuss of him when he does this. I try to ask people to ignore him, but they just say things like 'Oh he's ok, he's cute' etc. Actually reading that back I need to be firmer with the people, don't I?

We have a fairly serious problem with grooming him at the moment; he needs a lot of brushing and its just proving to be impossible. He mouths the brush and tries to grab it from me. The only way he gets a brush is if DH holds him in a headlock while I brush him (dog, not DH ). Are all dogs like this?

I have a long (10m) outdoor line, which I think I'm going to have to start using when we're out. It seems such a shame though, he loves playing with other dogs and I worry that he'll end up hating me for curtailing his fun. How would I go about using this?

Finally, he sleeps in our bedroom (on the floor) which I fear may be exacerbating the problem. I have read so many conflicting pieces of advice of this subject that I don't really know what to believe. Dog's Trust say that dogs are happiest sleeping near their owners, but I can logically see that he might be developing an overinflated sense of himself.

Can anybody help please?

He sounds like a typical teenager to me not that I'm an expert. Perhaps you just need to up do a bit more (reward based) training and be consistent I guess. ALso, try to anticipate situations in the park which you think your dog will respond badly too. With my puppy, for instance, I have to look out for joggers and distract her before they appear otherwise she will chase them much to my embarrassment. With the grooming, my pup does this too so I'll be interested in responses. My puppy class teacher encourages you to use treats whilst grooming so the dog associates grooming with nice things, but I just don't have enough hands to manage this. I did read in a book that you could use those nasty tasting sprays (the ones you use on wires and other things you don't want your dog to chew on) on brushes and leads but personally I want my dog to enjoy being groomed - the way my cats do. I saw the lady whose dog (llhasa apso) won Crufts being interviewed on BBC and she said she grooms her dog for at least an hour each day and the dog loves it. I can't imagine ever getting close to that but would like a nicely brushed dog.

BTW I don't think yours is the only labradoodle to behave like this. I love their bounciness and exuberance but can understand you wish to have a bit more control.

Thanks for your reply yesbutnobut

I think you've hit the nail on the head re his teenagerness, he does know what to do, but chooses to ignore me. Perhaps this will get better as he reaches maturity?

We do try to avoid flashpoints like places where children play, but I live near the sea, so as summer approaches (and the beaches are full of families) I really need to be on top of this. I will work on the distraction though, that is probably the best approach.

Our puppy class also suggested the treats while grooming, but it really seems to have no effect with him - he will ignore the treat and continue to grab the brush. I also saw the llhasa apso on Crufts and wish we could get to a place where he enjoys being groomed. It seems a long way off at the moment though

I love his bounce and exuberance (as do most other people) and don't want to train this out of him entirely. The thing is, I work with someone with a massive dog phobia that came about by a German Shepard knocking him off his bike as a child. I'm determined not to be 'that' dog owner, but its a difficult balance to strike. He managed to knock a child flying last summer - it was hideous and the parents (quite rightly) didn't have a sense of humour about it at all. It WILL NOT happen again this summer, I just need to reassert myself as being in charge. Not necessarily in a pack leader kind of way (don't buy that theory) but so that he will do what I request.

I wish I could train him to recognise when someone wants to play and when they don't. Don't think that's going to happen though!

What breed of dog do you have?

What other things float his boat apart from treats? The whole recalling for a treat and then rushing back to whatever he was doing before is perfectly understandable and reasonable behaviour for a dog. I like this (other dog) and I like that (bit of sausage) hey! I can have both! HOORAY!

To get a sustained recall and one that will having your dog much more focused on you is to make yourself fun. Waaaay more fun. Like the funnest thing in your dog's world ever.
I am Captain Fun in this house as I am the keeper of the Holy of Holies: The Kong Wubba Wet. It's just a ball really with floppy bits on the end (and it floats) but for my dog it trumps everything, because when that Kong Wubba comes out OH MY GOD it's like Christmas Freaking Day down Labrador way!
She can play tuggy with it and we can do lots of little throws and retrieves in all directions and sometimes it goes in the river and really if my dog could speak she would say playing with me and that Kong Wubba is Awesome

So we do recall-play
Recall- play
Recall-big play
recall - play

Over and over and over. My dog is a Kong Wubba junkie.

When it is fixed then you can start to reduce the rewards. Making it a gamble for your dog (will she or won't she bring out The Kong Wubba) gives a much stronger response.

Gosh, you could be talking about my dog, op, at that age. She was and still is very quick to find any reason to think highly of herself!

I find a mixture of treats and punishment works for her. So, for example, if I call her in the park and she comes, she gets a treat and a praise and we continue on our exciting walk. If she goes away or ignores, she is back on the leash, walk cut short and a silent trip home. Everytime. It is very effective, and she understands what she has done. If might sound harsh, but the recall thing is key for me, as it might save her life.

Regarding the brushing thing, I put a stick or chewy thing in her mouth while I brush her, and if she is good, she gets a treat after. She is also good with her bath now, and stands quietly while being washed. But after the bath, she always get a big bowl of warm food as a reward.

Tbh, she is very good with me now and a joy, but my dh spoils her and she really tests the boundaries with him. She adores him, but I can almost see her pea brain work to see what she can get away with

I'm liking that idea slubberdegullion.

Unfortunately, the thing that really gets him going is running around with other dogs (and I think he sees DCs as playmates too). DH and I are dullsville by comparison.

Perhaps a 'special' toy will be the key to making us more exciting to him?

We haven't really helped ourselves with toys, as they tend to be scattered about the house/in his bed so he doesn't see them as particularly 'special' and certainly wouldn't recall for one of those.

I think what I'll do is buy him a new 'Mummy only' toy and do as you suggested - if he associates that toy with playing with me, he might see it as being the Holy of Holies.

Thanks - good tip

Oh sorry flatbread x posted there - I have thought about the putting back on lead/going home early tactic and I'm encouraged to hear that its working for you.

How do you implement it? If she ignores you, do you go and get her and put her on the lead? I fear our chap would see that as a game of chase and take off!

Interestingly, he's fine with bathing (we have to shower him though, he's just too fluffy for the bath) its just the brushing.

My concern with this in particular is because we were thinking about him being a Pets as Therapy dog one day (when he's under better control, obviously!). They state in their guidelines that dogs have to stay still and not resist grooming as this is a good indicator of whether they respect their owner's authority. Kind of made me think, and was what led to me startin g the thread tbh.

My DH spoils the little chap too. Annoying, but actually quite cute too

Re chewing the brush - try making a sharp SSsssss noise through your teeth, then treat as soon as the dogs looks up. Worked for me.

Are you the pack leader?
Do you greet you dog when you get in?
Do you make him wait for his food?
If DH spoils him then perhaps the dog is higher up the pack leadership tree than DH which might be "cute" but is asking for behavioural problems isn't it?

noinspiration Another good tip, thanks very much. In fact, I might even combine the two - making a noise and treating as you suggested then, if he's been 'good' and allowed me to groom him for say 1 minute, perhaps treat with a game with the 'Mummy Toy'?

EssentialFattyAcid Thanks for your comment, I was under the impression that pack theory had been discredited though?

I'm trying to establish myself and DH as resource controllers instead (this is what we were taught at puppy classes)

I do greet him when I come in, but wait until he has calmed down to do so.

I don't make him wait for his food, as this is one of the points that I believe Pack theory was discredited on (that packs of wolves only have a feeding order in captivity, not in the wild)

I appreciate your contribution though

Forget any sort of "pack leader" nonsense.

And what Slubber said.

Making yourself more fun than other dogs, or anything else, is key.

You need to get a bit clever, I think, with recall.

Whatever your dog is finding attractive at the time, you need to trump it.

E.G - if you're recalling the dog away from a bit of stale bread, use a lovely bit of cheese or ham.

If you're recalling away from a stranger who's giving a fuss - give even MORE fuss when he arrives (and maybe a bit of ham as well).

If you're recalling away from play, offer even more, BETTER play.

You should reach a stage where the sight of another dog, or person, is a cue for your dog to come to you for a game rather than approach the other attraction.

A long line is a good idea for training - apart from anything else, it prevents the dog practising the undesired activity. Otherwise, as you've said, accepting the treat and then running back to the previous activity becomes a habit.

Yy to the making yourself mega exciting.

I use a very very exciting tuggy rope. I look a right twat running around the fields with it, chucking it up in the air, chasing it, and so on- It means my pup thinks its the BEST toy ever and whenever it appears out my massively over stuffed pocket, he comes barreling over for a game.

Right, on the advice, this is winging its way to me as we speak.

I'll report back to let you know how we get on.

Sorry, I meant to say thanks very much, I appreciate you all taking the time to help me (us) out

I had no idea that the "pack leader " stuff was out of the window is "controller of resources" different?

With the brushing, we used treats as a reward and took it very slowly. To begin with he got a treat for seeing the brush, and I also pretend-brushed him (i.e. not actually touching him but moving the brush in the air around him) at first. Then we gradually built up to it. I used the treats as distraction, holding it in my hand so he could sniff and lick it but not actually giving it to him right away until he'd allowed the brush close to him. I also kept the sessions short and as he got used to it, I tried to always stop at a point well before he got fed up with it all. This was with an adult rescue dog and we had to be very careful at the beginning because we had been warned that he hated it and would bite. It took us a couple of months but now he loves being groomed. I'm sure a professional dog trainer would have got there more quickly, but anyway it worked.

As for playing with other dogs, we practise calling him out of play sessions, rewarding him and then letting him go back. We do this with friends' dogs that he knows well, which makes it easier, but the idea is that it will also work at the dog park with new (and therefore more exciting) dogs. Again this has taken a while because at first he just wanted to ignore us and keep playing. He is getting much better at it and will do it about 90pc of the time, but he still embarrasses me sometimes.

OP, I go and put her on the lead. If I call her and then put her on the lead, it is punishing her for coming, iyswim, and that is a no-no. I go to her with no expression and no noise. By now she knows the drill so accepts her fate when she has disobeyed the sacred recall command

She resists in her own fashion, though. She has to sit and scratch herself on her route back to me, and I can see near thinking of a diversion so she can continue the fun thing. But she knows my attention is fully on her, so she comes back.

I don't use the recall command very much though. But when I do, she knows I mean business.

I don't know about the brushing and pack leader thing. Recently, when I brush our girl, my neighbour's dog (who is usually around) butts in and pushes himself in-between so i brush him Instead. He loves it and goes down all cuddly next to me and licks my hand. Such a lovely contrast to our urchin dog. When she sees him enjoying the touches, suddenly, she wants to be groomed too

I don't know if it is right, but if horror dog legs it, I growl furiously at him, then calmly call him and give him a treat and a game and anything else I can think of. The rewards for coming back are greater than what happens when he runs off. None of our dogs like being groomed. It tickles.