Any advice on buying a family dog to help my anxious child?

[ToffeeWhirl]

My DS1 (12) has OCD and other anxiety issues and is off school at the moment. He has asked for a dog many times in the past, but it was impossible for us before, as we could not be sure that we could be in the house enough to look after it and didn't think it fair to leave the dog alone for too long. However, we are now in a position where there is always someone around in the house, so that is no longer a problem.

DS would be over the moon if we bought a dog. He loves playing with his friends' dogs. Our hope is that, as well as bringing something to the whole family, it would help to distract DS from his anxieties and encourage him to get out (he is virtually housebound at present).

Do any of you have any thoughts on this or advice on what sort of dog to look for? We thought of getting a rescue dog rather than a puppy, but have no idea what breed. It would have to be smallish, as we live in a terraced house with a small paved garden. However, we have access to long walks on the South Downs only a short distance away, so no problem with walking the dog.

We haven't mentioned this to either of our children yet, by the way, as we want to do our research first before committing ourselves. We realise that a dog is a big responsibility.

Hi toffeewhirl - on the allergy note, most people are allergic to the dander (skin flakes) not the hair as many assume. My dh has bad allergy (has been hospitalised by it before now) so we thought we could never have a dog but we now have a collie/lab cross who is fab and he has never reacted as he just isn't a dandruffy dog even though he is quite hairy! So if you find your allergy playing up with your dog, check for dandruff, and that can be helped with good diet containing oils to keep doggy skin supple and not dry.

We use Hills scientific or James Wellbeloved on our dog, but my parents use Bakers and all their dogs have had dandruff (but they can't afford better).

We also never allow the dog upstairs at all and that helps keep the doggy-ness in the house down.

hth

www.lurcherlink.org/llink/forum/viewforum.php?f=15

FAQ re lurchers inc all the different types

It's all written by owners so you get the honest views of the good/bad/ugly.

Might help your research

I dont really believe that a breed of dog is right or not, its the dog itself and any good rescue woudl be able to tell you the dogs temperament.

Anecdote Alert: In my (totally) biased opinion you cant go wrong with a Staffie. Very sturdy and tolerant of being pulled about, short haired (no double coat) so no sheddling all over the place and not smelly, apart from their farts. Medium sized, loveable, like running about but also equally happy lazing about on a chair or bed. Mine is a true friend for life to all of us and she loves our 2 DSs (3 and 6 months), Ive had many dogs and can safely say that from now on I'll only have Staffies

Unfortunately you would be able to take your pick of Staffies as they are overbred and there are lots of them that need good homes.

hellboy I second that

GinPalace - thanks, that's good advice about the dog allergy issue. We are already planning to have a dog-free zone upstairs. I read online that it's a good idea to spend some time with the dog first, just to see if you get any allergic reaction. I will see if I can do that. I visited someone yesterday and wasn't able to ask if they had a pet, but I could feel my nose itching straight away. Hopefully, it was a cat though (I'm more allergic to them).

Lurchers, staffies and collie/lab crosses duly added to my list of possibles!

I am now worrying about whether we would even be eligible for a rescue dog because we don't have a very dog-friendly garden. Our garden is upstairs and it's small, on three levels and terraced. No running around space at all. A little dog might be able to pootle round, but it wouldn't be much fun for him. We do have a small yard leading off our kitchen, which could be turned into a small, doggy space, complete with small kennel, toys, outside doggy loo and so on. We could even fit a dog flap on the door. I know we'd have to commit to more walking because of our garden. At least we are near loads of open space, so no trouble walking the dog at all.

If we are turned down for a rescue dog, we will just have to look elsewhere (imagines cute puppy).

Having said that, we have now told DS1 what we are planning. The look of disbelief and then joy on his face was priceless .

Apologies for the block of text. For some reason, MN is not recognising paragraphs this afternoon .

Hi Toffeewhirl - I think you would still be eligible, I think rescue places are more concerned if garden secure from escape than providing main exercise opportunity, you have said you live close to lots of walking places and they will take that into account.

Your DS reaction was sooo cute - bet you really enjoyed breaking that news! I was smiling just imagining it!

It's also a good idea to disallow dog from upstairs as an excited doggy charging downstairs can be a hazard if mixed with small people also on the stairs

Gin - that's good to hear. We will need to put a fence up on one side and secure the yard area, but that's no problem. Our stairs would definitely be a hazard for dogs and little ones (very steep). Luckily, we still have a stairgate (have just never taken it down), so that can be there to stop the dog now going up now, rather than the children.

DS1 stayed with his best friend yesterday and they walked the friend's fox terrier on the Downs on their own. DS really enjoyed it. And this is the boy who has been virtually housebound for two months!

My DS2 has SN (severe hearing loss, balance impairment so he has 'interesting' mobility and, possibly, some emerging learning difficulties.) We adopted a retired racing greyhound in November and he's been lovely. Very affectionate (but not in a bouncy licky way) quiet and gentle. As some have said up thread, we went to the rescue with a list of our issues and they found him for us, not the other way round. We walked him with the children quite a few times before bringing him home so we felt we knew his temperament a little. We were not fussy about looks, size or sex, though particularly size could be an issue in adopting a dog.

Good luck. He's been great for us and I'm sure that with time you will find the one for you and your DS.

And so good to hear your DS had a good time yesterday.

Can I just agree with Ephiny re: size?

I had a large Lurcher years ago and exercise-wise, his only requirement was a good old sprint once or twice a day. The rest of the time was spent on his armchair ( ) giving every impression of having been stuffed.

I lived in a small flat at the time and he never seemed to take up much room or get under my feet.

Whereas a busy little JRT, for instance, may well be small but are often "A lot of dog" in proportion to their size.

Hello. I have a lovely gentle whippet and a very small back garden.

He is an enormous lazer and spends all day curled up on various comfy surfaces, often cuddled up with one of the cats. He can handle longer walks and loves to run off the lead, but doesn't require a huge amount of exercise at all. I live near a common and exercise him there a lot. So I don't think garden size comes into it. He's much smaller than a greyhound and great with young children. Very short fur too so no real shedding issues.

They are a very laid-back breed basically although don't appeal to some due to being so thin and pointy. However, as you've got someone around all the time, you could go for a terrier type breed. I wouldn't have one due to my working hours as they need more stimulation and company than I would be around to give but you could definitely consider one. I second what has been said about lurchers too. I would love one. Especially a furry, whiskery one!

I agree the small garden might not be an issue - ours is definitely not big enough for dogs to run around and play, and it wasn't a problem for any rescues. The main thing is that you've got a bit of outside space, as there can be problems with house training otherwise, especially with a puppy, and that it's securely fenced.

We do live literally a couple of minutes from a park though, so they get plenty of opportunities to run and play there!

Good point about stairs, and it's not just children! My younger Rott has very nearly sent me flying a couple of times when he's come hurtling down the stairs behind me . We have a stairgate now anyway to stop elderly dog attempting the stairs and getting stuck...