New puppy thread, where new puppy owners can come for help and advice and hopefully clever people like minimu, midori et al will check regularly (please) to help us...

[Happymm]

Exactly what it says on the tin really. Kings idea, that we have a thread where we can all come and ask for help, advice, support or just to vent and that the much more experienced people will come and help us out :)

Sweatymary, you can buy specialist products at places like Pets at Home, or use any biological washing powder (removes odour that pup can detect, whereas non-biological doesn't apparently).

Oops, didn't notice you had replied geepers, apologies for duplicating advice!

Hi everyone! Have been a bit quiet on here recently with real life getting in the way (and still no Internet so iPhone only). Puppy is good although chews everything when out of playpen so I spend a lot of time extracting things from his mouth. But obv not making a game of it at all. He has got better with biting etc but got excited in the park and clamped on to my daughter's hand - I got v cross.

But mainly am wondering whether he has added an extra layer of stress we didn't need. My husband works very long hours in the City and often leaves at 7:30am and isn't home until after 11pm and sometimes has to work weekends. He is stressed and we have been arguing and I wonder whether pup has exacerbated the situation. I am also feeling a bit tied to the house as we can't go out for the whole day or even a long morning at the moment as we can't leave the dog for long enough and it's getting me down. I have left him for about 2.5 hours but I think we'd need 4 to make the trips worth it (by the time we travel anywhere etc). Have thought I could crate him then get a dog walker to come after 2 hours then back for another 2 which would give me 5ish hours. But obv would mean a bit of planning... Am just resenting this a bit. And the weather has been so crap that we can't even go to parks for picnics which I thought we could do lots of and therefore puppy would come too. Argh! Sorry for moan.

Anyone else feeling like this at all?!

I know what you mean, kings and this was why it took over a year for the family to persuade me to get a puppy at all. But now he's here it's better than I thought it would be, BUT the difference is my DCs are much older than yours and can therefore be a real help in walking him, clearing up wee, playing with him in the garden etc.. Also, my DH has been able to organise his schedule around working at home recently on days when I'm at work. Must make a huge difference if you're effectively dealing with it all alone.
That said, we have left ours for longer than two hours. The intention has been for a maximum of 3 but something happened to DH last week at golf which stretched it to 4. Dog was OK - had weed on the kitchen floor but no big deal (often does that anyway, even if we're there!). Always creep up to the house when I've been out to see if he's barking while I've been gone but have never heard him yet. And after all, he's alone overnight for much longer than that and I'm pretty sure he's awake for a portion of that.
And moaning is what this thread is for!

Yes,me too Clam.My dh works overseas and is home 1 week every 4-6 weeks.Plus i have 4 dc's [although youngest is in reception now].I don't think i could have coped with a dog with kids younger than school age.As it is the puppy thinks he can get away with peeing inside at the weekend, as there are so many things going on, he thinks we won't notice puddles of wee under the table.Also he thinks my 5 year old ds is lower than him in the pecking order because he squeals a lot [in play and actuality!].I don't know how you all manage with younger children.Is it not really difficult to watch the kids and the puppy at the same time?.

Hmm, mind you, I have to say that I think the dog would be better-behaved on the weeing front if I'd been in sole charge all along. DH's idea of encouraging him to go outside is to open the back door. I go out there to the garden (in a dressing gown, wellingtons and umbrella if necessary) and -prod encourage him until he caves.
And my kids still wind the dog up when playing so he's likely to nip. He doesn't dare do it to me.

Thanks clam and teta. Good to have some support - you're right - I do do most of it myself which makes it seem harder. Teta - it is really hard watching both toddler and puppy! Doesn't always happen...

Clam - perhaps I can leave him for 3/4 hours now (don't they say 1 hour per month? He is 3.5 now!) and he obv does 8-9 hours overnight. I leave him in crate so feel a bit bad as small space etc and he won't want to wee in it. But could either leave in playpen or in crate and make crate full-size in case he is desperate to wee in the corner and so he'd have more space. My husband says I should just leave him and he'll be fine! people work and have puppies - I guess they have a dog walker half way through the day, ie after 4 hours...

It's also v annoying if out for a day trip with dog too that we can't go to the playground as no dogs. Totally understand why! Just makes it a big awkward. He can fit through the fence still so won't stay outside playground tied up so can't leve him (plus makes an awful racket), so that makes me fed up too when my daughter is desperate to go to the playground! I feel sorry for her! Sorry am really all moan moan moan today!

Our regular evening walk is to the playground.Doggies are allowed here and this is obviously a satisfactory destination for the dc's .

Kings - I felt like that until about two weeks ago; at that time we had tickets for an air show (bought ages ago) and dogs weren't allowed. I was so sad that DH and DC were going to go without me that I made the decision to put pup into kennels for the day.

Honestly, it was the best thing we could've done. She didn't particularly enjoy it, but we had a great time and it prompted me to make it a regular thing. In fact she has been again since then (and enjoyed it!) and is going again on Sunday.

Through the holidays it is going to be a weekly thing, and maybe fortnightly or monthly after that. She hasn't stayed overnight yet, but £10 for the occasional dog-free day is well worth it I think - every time the DC ask to do something where pup can't come I tell them that we can do it next Sunday (or whenever).

I don't know, maybe I am being a bit hard..but I think she will begin to see it as part of her life, and we get a little break too.

King's ours has been left for 4 hours max and she has been fine - had to leave her for 5-6 hours once so I got a friend to come in after 2 hours, let her out of crate take her in garden for a play etc and then friend left her for an hour in the kitchen and came back and put her in crate.

We have left her for 3.5 - 4 hours on a few evenings out, but this isn't so bad for her because it just means going to bed a bit earlier i.e. we go out at 7 and come back at 11.00 but usually she is sleeping from 9.00 anyway. On these occasions I take her out in the garden at 11.00 and give her a bit of a play before putting her back to bed.

I have also left her for 3-3.5 hours a few times during the day and she is allways sleepy when I get home so assume she sleeps the whole time - much like she does if I am here!

Julian I intend to do exactly the same with my pup when she is old enough - think they have to be 6 months don't they? I thought yours was a bit younger than that, if so how old is she? I might ring the kennels soon and ask them if she can come for the day as I really want her to get used to it as early as possible - we have a great kennels literally 5 mins from the house so it will be really convenient and useful to get her in there to get used to it asap.

Spam, our pup is 15 weeks tomorrow (and was not quite 13 weeks when she went to the kennels I think) - all they wanted was proof of vaccinations, they weren't worried about her age at all. I think it probably depends on the circumstances though, because they told me they had turned away someone who wanted their 12 week old puppy to stay in for a week while they went on holiday.

I agree that it is a good idea to start early, if it is something that they will have to do from time to time. I really looked around to find kennels that I was happy with, but in the end the one 5 mins away was the best (and I had heard lots of good things about it).

The first time she went 9-6 but, although they said she'd been OK, she was very hungry and thirsty when she got home which made me suspect she hadn't been very happy.

The second time she went 11-5 and had obviously been fine - ate all her food and snacks, drank plenty etc and when I turned up (an hour earlier than they were expecting me) she was tearing around the field with a member of staff.

We're sending ours to doggy day care next Sunday. We have a family reunion which, whilst we could technically take him, we'd I'd not be able to relax for a minute. Hoards of cousins chasing footballs around - they might just boot him over the fence, plus he's not reliable enough on the weeing indoors front. That's an embarrassment I could do without.
So he's off with his "cousin" for the day. They'll have a ball of their own.

Had the crappist day again-seems to have gone back to square one...loads of biting. Loads of not obeying. Loads of just being an enormous stress. Bit my DH head off when he just walked in after a big stressful day himself. :(

Not sure we've done the right thing here...she just isn't giving me any enjoyment at all. She's just a chore, and not even a nice one at that. Have to watch her every minute, as she's either biting, or chewing or digging something up I don't want digging up. Have to keep her separate from DC unless am there to watch, which is hard when trying to cook dinner etc.

Really really cannot wait until we go on holiday for 2wks next wk. So looking forward to not thinking about the bloody dog. Pup going back to breeders...am hoping she comes back a different dog-otherwise am thinking they can keep her. :(

With you as usual Kings...really shouted at Summer tonight as she bit my smallest for no reason at all. She got a major shouting at. Kids were shocked as don't normally shout. Shocked myself too...:(

I use woolite with Oxy to get out the smell.

Does it help to know that it passes?

Puppies are bloody hard work in every possible way - and I have always felt that puppyhood is the least rewarding part of having a dog. They have so much to learn to make them the lovely, fun adult dogs that they will in all likelihood turn into and they can't learn it all without hours of input from us.

Don't feel bad about shouting at them - every now and then it's what they need. Mind you - shouting more than every now and then is counter productive because it loses it's impact!

Dogs are a tie - you just don't have the freedom to do as you please in the same way once there's a dog at home. Even with my adult dogs, I don't leave them alone for more than 4/5 or so hours at the very outside. If we have a commitment which is likely to take more time than that, I arrange for a dog sitter to come in for half the day.

I do feel quite strongly that as our dogs had absolutely no choice in coming to live here; so I have to do the very best I can for them. They are social animals and need company to thrive; I couldn't have a dog and leave it alone all day although I know many people do.

It does take a while to get used to working around the commitment - puppy sitters, dog walkers, doggy day care are all options to give you freedom to take long day trips/overnights/holidays. It just takes a bit of pre-planning.

Great post!!!! I've been awake with severe anxiety since 1am ... It's 6 pm now. I don't remember being this close to a nervous breakdown with my kids ... Sigh ... It will get better.

oh this is just lovely ... He's had 3 loose poos this afternoon ... Sigh. no wonder he's acting like a robo brat dog ... My oldest stayed in the basement this evening because he growled at us whe I was protecting her from the jumpy nippy brat dog.

I need a drink.

When will this blasted animal learn that it is NOT OK to wee indoors? Surely he must have got the hint by now?

Not a good morning either.Bit youngest dd on the foot,scratched the skin but didn't draw blood.She ran onto sofa where he was growling at her and eldest dd yelled at him and hauled him into the cage.She wasn't doing anything to cause this behaviour apart from running round in crocs that he likes to chew periodically [maybe he perceives them as being his!].

Happy - am at that point too. Am starting to wonder whether this is putting unecessary/avoidable stress on our marriage, and we were stressed without the dog with husband working all hours and weekends and us not seeing him much and him coming home exhausted and stressed.
We are going camping in sept and we were going to take him but I have realised that maybe we shouldn't as then I can have a break from dealing with him mostly alone! Also if it rains which is v likely it means we can do indoor activities. If the weather were good it would be a different story!

Daisy - thank you - words of wisdom. I think this is probably the worst bit as novelty has worn off and patience has run thin but he is still a naughty puppy. He isn't that bad but he will run and grab any toys and chew anything he can find when out of his playpen. I know this is mainly normal but he seems to be a real chewer... And house open plan so can't have my daughter in another room etc. He is in his play pen more often than not - is that mean?! When she sleeps for 2 hours at lunch and in the evenings he is out of it. He also barks lots if he doesn't want to be in it and I ignore but Christ it does my head in after a while and I do sometimes shout quiet at him which works for a bit. He barks in the morning to get up at 7 and also when I am getting my daughter up etc he is in pen and often barks (has been to loo/been fed)

Sometimes I just think I am making my life miserable at the moment but then he bounds over clearly adoring me and desperate to see me and he is very good with lots of commands already - have even managed to get him to leave my daughter's toys sometimes. It breaks my heart to even think about the unmentionable! The guilt.

Thing is, if I had full time help it would be fine and dog sitters/walkers but it's just expensive in London! And we could do with not spending more money just so I can alleviate some stress - surely I should suck it up and deal with it! Also, you have to book in advance so how will you know when you need them?! I suppose £15 for a walk (hour) would give me 2 hours in crate either side giving 5 hours - probably worth it once a week....

Sorry again to be so miserable - it's good to get it all out!

Ps there is a possibility we night move abroad with my husband's job. Like far east - how would a dog work there?! Probably better as would have full time live in help I suppose!

PPs after a frantic start he is asleep in his pen looking at me every so often...

Oh dear everyone sounds so unhappy

On a brighter note it really does get easier - our pup is 20 weeks today and she is so much better than a few weeks ago. Weeing/pooing is pretty much allways outside - she has only had one accident in the last couple of weeks and that's because my mum was looking after her and didn't realise she had to actually go out with her to the garden and check she had gone for a wee before letting her back in. Also weeing and pooing are far less frequent, she can wait 2-3 hours now for a wee and only poo's 2-3 times a day so not this constant in and out to the garden.

Sleeping is still really good - she didn't get up until 8.20am today which I was not expecting so we all overslept, thankfully I work from home, DH also works from home and daughter on school holidays so no harm done!

Biting - is and always has not been a problem once I did a really big oww and cried and created such a scene one day. Occasionally she will snap her jaws towards us in play but when she does we just say no biting and she stops.

Bad points - digging up my garden! My fault though I didn't walk her yesterday and it resulted in some holes in the garden. Just timing a torrential rain mean't I didn't take her - bad mummy!

BARKING! god she is a pain with the barking, thinking of trying to teach her to bark on command so I can then teach her to stop barking on command.

Going to ring the kennels and think about putting her in for half a day soon.

We've had the debate about holidays. We'd always said that if we got a dog, we wouldnt go abroad this year as he'd be too young to leave. So we booked a "dog-friendly" cottage in this country. Even so, we're now wondering if we naively over-estimated how this would work out. He won't be able to manage long walks, only a few beaches allow dogs (and they're probably the dull ones), and we'll only be able to eat/drink at pubs and cafes where we can sit outside. God help us if it's raining! And I'm nervous that when the accommodation people "welcome dogs" they mean dogs, not puppies. Especially not puppies who STILL WEE INDOORS DESPITE BEING NEARLY 16 WEEKS OLD!!! Thought we'd be over this by now - and we are in the main, but not reliably. Fortunately, there are fantastic grounds so that may help. And hard floors. Will take the crate and the stairgate. And lots of puppy pads, kitchen roll and cleaning fluid! And we have a few weeks to go to beat him out of it get him sorted. Plus, I will be in charge, not DH which makes a big difference.