12 month old early waking- help!

[Wellhowaboutthat]

My 12 month old has never been the best sleeper- not awful but not great. But from about 9-11 months he started to sleep for 11-12 hour stretches overnight in his own room, with predictable 2 naps in the day - one around 9 and one around 2 (total 3-4h of sleep in the day)
Since we returned from a holiday 5 weeks ago he has started waking at 3-4am. He goes down at about 7pm and sleeps til then. I try everything to get him to go back to sleep - rocking/singing/Ferber type sleep training/take him into bed with us - nothing works! I then give up some time around 5 and start the day.

Sleep in the day hasn’t changed much but I struggle to keep him going to 9am (same in nursery) for first nap as he is so tired! For that reason I don’t think he is ready to drop a nap.

anyone have any ideas? Both me and my husband work full time and I’m so exhausted and keep getting unwell.
will try anything!

Have you tried going to bed earlier yourself?

It's the simplest solution to your being exhausted

More than likely this is a blip. Sometimes you're caught between them needing the nap but its. effecting bedtime sleep, it's not for forever. Sleep isn't linear and there will be times where it's tougher, that's the thing with young kids.

Is your partner also getting up with the baby? Taking it in turns?

Thanks so much for replying!
yes been trying to get to bed earlier but as I work full time with a commute the evenings are the only time I have to catch up on home stuff.
both I and husband have quite serious professional jobs but his is more immediately life/death without being too outing (mine is not much less!) so I do the lions share of childcare outside of my working time.
I think you’re right - maybe best to just go to bed earlier and go with the flow until it sorts itself out as it’s most likely temporary. Thanks!

Can you put him to bed later? It sounds like he is sleeping for a solid 8 hours. If you could make that align more closely with the 8 hours you want to be in bed, you would be in a much better place.

The other option is wake to sleep. Setting you alarm clock for just before he usually wakes, disturbing him slightly, and then hopefully everyone going back to sleep.

It's pretty grim being awake at that time. Given that you've tried everything, don't waste your emotions on trying to fix it anymore. Instead go to bed really early yourself. Even though it's a pain to give up your evening, think of it as very temporary.

I used to bring baby to bed in those early hours with a few toys and CBeebies on while I dozed.

How long for each nap? 3-4 hours might be too much total now he's older and will likely be dropping a nap in the next few months.

I would start with capping the first nap to 40-45 mins and see if that shifts the sleep to the night. Long morning naps can also reinforce early wakings as seen as an extension to night sleep.

When we got split nights it normally meant needed to cap naps. If he still needs a morning nap then would just shorten it. Then as approach nap dropping time you will probably need to cap the afternoon sleep as well to keeping them going longer until ready to switch to one nap.

Thanks all! Some great ideas here