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Original poster

BBC2 TONIGHT 9pm Edge of Life

46 replies

KangaSantaMummy · 02/12/2004 19:13

Is this Baby's Life Worth Living?

It is about premature babies

As our twins were born at 27 weeks + 5 days

we will be watching.

DS1 died aged 5½ hours

DS2 was in NNU ITU for 3 months

He is now 9½ years old.

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JoolsTide · 03/12/2004 00:05

can't even imagine - too sad for words - really big HUG to you!

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 00:15

thanks JT

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biglips · 03/12/2004 00:33

kangasantamummy - i was filling up when i read your last comments. you are a very brave lady . On the TV tonight it shocked me about small they were compared to mine and the weight of 750g!!! i nearly fell off my chair as mine being a 9lb 1oz and the baby's hand palm was same size as the mum's thumbnail.... too sad....

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 00:49

Thanks biglips

Mine were actually quite big

DS1 was 2lb 13 oz

DS2 was 2lb 12½ oz

So they were big for gestation IYSWIM.

They are identical so we are glad that we know what DS1 would look like now.

But it is very hard when seeing Identical twins out or on TV etc.

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misdee · 03/12/2004 08:17

i watched the 2nd half of the programme. i really thought they were going to lose Hannah. Its amazing that hannah had the most probs compared to riley (from what i saw) and yet it was Riley who had CP in the end. I remember holding mieows dd's in SCBU as they were born at 32 and 33 weeks (think thats right) and thought they were tiny, but these babies must have been even smaller.

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 13:20

frogs which months were you there?

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frogs · 03/12/2004 13:25

KSM -- sorry, was composing a reply to you earlier, and computer crashed on me.

We were there in the last two weeks of June 1995 -- if you'd seen my dd1 you would have remembered, as she was 9lb and looked pretty daft crammed into an incubator.

There was a genuine reason for her being there (obviously), but we were getting a lot of sideways glances from the other parents, as dd1 was clearly not a typical NNU customer (as one of the nurses put it).

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 13:28

which nursery was she in?

we were 2 and 4 then 5

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partywigandredrobe · 03/12/2004 13:30

Message deleted

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 13:32

partywigandredrobe

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JuniperDropofbrandy · 03/12/2004 13:38

Oh wigandrobe that's broken my heart. ((((((hugs))))) to you and yours. You do right not watching things like this when you've suffered so much.

I believe in angels too and I'm sure you're right.

MariNativityPlay · 03/12/2004 13:39

partywigandredrobe, so sorry
KSM, I do remember you talking about your little boy who died. Hugs to you too
Lowryn, it is never too late for your mum to contact SANDS to talk about the death of her son, if she feels it would help. Not just the technology but attitudes to premature birth have changed so much for the better, thank God.
I couldn't watch this programme - we had a little boy born dead at 21+5 in 2002. At least we never had the agonising rollercoaster of NICU life that we know other parents experience.
Dd spent 48 hours in SCBU when she was born (like Frogs, we attracted some glances as she was also 9lbs and full of attitude) and that was bad enough.

foxinsocks · 03/12/2004 13:39

sorry for all your losses

I thought the programme was incredible. That poor woman going into labour again at 24 weeks. It struck me how amazing they all were as couples - both partners were so supportive and both couples seemed to work really well as teams - I can imagine how easy it is for relationships to suffer with the stress of having babies in intensive care in London while you live miles away.

I also thought the doctors and nurses were brilliant with the parents and always seemed to be completely realistic about what would happen. Poor little Hannah - I really thought at one stage that she wasn't going to make it. Both the boys (born at 24 weeks) seemed incredibly bright (despite their setbacks) and I loved the shot of granny swimming with the older brother. He just looked so happy. Must be incredibly frightening to have a baby so small and defenceless.

colette · 03/12/2004 13:42

partywigandredrobe - So sorry that you lost your little boy. I was so sad watching it and have not lost a child/and am not pregnant.
My db was born at 28wks and they told my mum whilst she was in labour that he would not live, and like Lowryn's mum she was put in a side room and left. When he was born he came out yelling and is now 37 years old. She had lost his twin early on..
Reillys mum and dad are brilliant they and Hannah's parents made me feel humbled by their strenghth .

frogs · 03/12/2004 13:44

We got moved around quite a bit -- she was on the intensive care side for the first week, and then in the special care side.

We were in there with the older two as well, so it's all a bit of a blur. Spent a fairly hellish week in that titchy parents' room with ds -- it was a roasting hot July and I thought I'd never breathe fresh air again.

But the staff were all wonderful.

heymissytoe · 03/12/2004 13:59

I watched this with a combination of awe and sadness and dp asked me why I always watch when it clearly upsets me and to be honest I really don't know. Our dd was born by emergency c section at 33 weeks weighed 3 lbs which was pretty good for her as she was a small baby. She was absolutely fine it was due to my high bp that the pregnancy had to end but going into scbu (neonatal unit) was like landing on Mars I just didn;t have a clue and I was afraid as hell and dd is my first baby and doctors and dp and my midwife were so great but I was so so afraid. I have been on mumsnet nearly a month now and have always wanted to start a thread for us mums and babes who have experienced this but its such a roller coaster of emotions. Kangasantamummy I burst into tears when I read your first post and just had no idea - like everyone says you are amazing and you too westcountrylass. wheresmyfroggy I have a friend who's sone was also born 27/28 weeks and is abosolutely fine now - 3 years old and you should see the size of him. Some very early gestation children do have severe problems and then some really just do not and its not an exact science at all. The girl on the programme I was sure she was beyond all help and was beginning to think if I were in those parents shoes would I administer steroids that could result in brain damage and then the paralysis treatment - oh god - and then miracle she pulls through beyond all odds and may have next to no severe disabilities when she starts school - I still can't believe it and I admire those parents for making treatment decisions that I am sure a lot of us - no I mean I would be too scared to consider. You just don't know what you would do unless it really happens to you. Kangamummy whilst my dd was in neonatal (just had to put on weight) I was told about boys not doing as well as the girls - my dd had no problems and progressed really quickly and they put this down to her gender and this is what scares me about future pregnancies - my high bp in pregnancy may be genetic and so unavoidable so any future babes may have to be taken out early too and what if they are boys - it sounds silly but it really scares me (now I will run and hide having exposed my cowardice)

biglips · 03/12/2004 18:25

well i was surprise when i was late due to give birth (10 days late - has to be induced). as before i got pregnant i was taken off the pill for life due to high blood pressure - it was 145/ 95 - its what old people have but im only 30. we planned our baby and during my pregnancy my BP was slowly going DOWN not UP!!, towards the end i said the midwife that "im not normal as it should go up" and midwife said "i know". i was abit worried about having early birth but baba didnt want to come out.

i feel sad for all the people who lost their babies, i couldnt stop thinking about it today and i would be terrifed to be in that situation.

WestCountryLass · 03/12/2004 19:33

Heymissytoe

You are not a coward at all. I worried about the same things, would I have another preterm labour with DD and at 34 weeks I was admitted as I was having contractions and had dilated to one cm but everything stopped and she was not born for another 5 weeks.

I am led to believe most babies born after 30 weeks have a good outcome so hopefully you would make it that far and if your baby is given the steriods they do tend to thrive after birth too.

Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 19:51

sorry I did not mean to mislead anyone about boys or girls and which were stronger

DS1 had infection because his waters had been leaking since 23 + 2 weeks until 27 + 5 weeks when they were born.

So it didn't have anything to do really with them being boys.

So I was bed bound in hospital from 23 weeks.

For all mumsnetters who have lost babies I would recommend SANDS

we always get our christmas cards from there {100 approx} because it is our way of reminding people about DS1.

DS2 knows all about his older twin brother because I believe in honesty with him over things like that especially being identical twins.

We have got videoed scans of the two of them kicking each other, the hospital we went to videoed the scans as they happened on VCR.

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Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 19:53

BTW I was given steriods each week for their lungs to help them develop

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Original poster

KangaSantaMummy · 03/12/2004 20:18

new thread

I have started a new thread as this one the programme has already been on TV

IYSWIM

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