Long lost family

[Pebbledashery]

Is anyone else a crying mess within 5 minutes!??

I love Long Lost Family. It regularly brings tears to my eyes.

I hate how unmarried mothers used to be treated. Made to give up their babies, often having already looked after them for several weeks too. They were then supposed to just go home and forget about them, picking up their lives as if nothing had happened.

It was a barbaric practice. I can't believe that there were actually people who ever thought it would work.

Yes, Davina was abandoned by her birth mum then I think thru had a strained relationship in later life
Was never particularly a fan of Nicky or Davina in the past but they are both very genuine and warm in LLF. It's a really heartwarming programme

I really like Davina and Nicky on LLF, they are so genuinely happy for everyone.

My friend was adopted, she had a happy childhood. Her birth parents went on to get married. She was able to contact them, but they didn't want anything to do with her. So hurtful.

I'm watching an earlier one - Blackpool and Huddersfield - I'm really noticing how noone uses a tissue. They are all wiping noses and tears with fingers. Even a random florist just wiped her nose with her hand. Must be my post covid spectacles!

I'm adopted and 1960's adoption was a brutal process with all sides involved coming from a place of loss. Adoptive parents mainly had unresolved infertility issues which could then be solved by the "immoral act" of a young mother. The numbers of babies adopted pre legalised abortion are staggering.

Watching tonight's episode
Socially distanced reunion was quite awkward to watch.....

God I'm a sobbing mess

@Pebbledashery

Watching tonight's episode Socially distanced reunion was quite awkward to watch.....

Yes. It made the reunion so different and almost awkward.

@laughoutquiet it was the thumbs up.. That made me utterly cringe.

Ian and one of the sisters have just been on Lorraine. Ranvir (standing in) asked about the Mum's health and the sister quickly shut it down and said it wouldn't be fair to talk about it while her Mum's not there.
Not sure what that was about.

What struck me was that Ian's dad talked about having the car packed and ready to run away if anyone came for Ian as a child, so it must be hard for him now that his birth family has been found.

I saw that Sparkling - thought the woman's response was very odd. Surely Ranvir would have been rude not to ask how she was doing, as her health was quite a big part of the televised reunion.

I reckon they would have had a hug when the cameras were off.

I thought that Ian's Dad having the car packed up was a way of showing Ian how much they wanted him, and would fight for him.
Noticed this morning that he talked about his brother too, who was also adopted.

@ajandjjmum

I saw that Sparkling - thought the woman's response was very odd. Surely Ranvir would have been rude not to ask how she was doing, as her health was quite a big part of the televised reunion.

I reckon they would have had a hug when the cameras were off.

I thought that Ian's Dad having the car packed up was a way of showing Ian how much they wanted him, and would fight for him.
Noticed this morning that he talked about his brother too, who was also adopted.

It's as if the Mother's illness was a huge secret. But I guess thery have their reasons for that. they said the daughter had Breast Cancer but just said Mum was out of hospital but no more.

What I was getting at with the car thing is that if they felt like that (about nobody taking him away) it must be quite an adjustment to see that 43 years later in a way the birth family did. Because life for the adoptive parents will never be the same again.

I don't know - as reunions go, it was all so awkward to watch.
The second one with the sisters had me in absolute tears though!

Always. I have never seen and episode and not cried.

I thought Ian seemed ambivalent about the whole thing - curious but also a bit overwhelmed by all these new people and relationships. He obviously has a very secure and loving relationship with his parents (adoptive).
I totally get why Julie needed to find out about him and meet him. How could you ever forget a child you had been forced to give away? I hope it's all working out for them despite covid problems.

I thought the sisters in Cornwall /Devon story was very touching and it looked like they'll have a great relationship.

I think Ian was holding back somewhat. It must be so hard because there's no getting the worms back in the can once you've met and it's all real.
The expectation must be immense and even more so when it's on the telly so his ambivalence may have been down to the stress of being filmed and it not being as natural as it could be.

There must be a lot of people who are found for LLF but maybe don't want to pursue meeting the people looking as they are fine as they are.

I think Ian just respects his adoptive parents too much.. That's not to say people who go on this show don't.. Something tells me he won't be as close to his birth mum as you would expect.. Which is his choice.

@Pebbledashery

I think Ian just respects his adoptive parents too much.. That's not to say people who go on this show don't.. Something tells me he won't be as close to his birth mum as you would expect.. Which is his choice.

It's hard to put yourself in the adoptive parents' shoes. Surely you would feel like you had lost a bit of your child. He found three siblings that had the same parents as him. I think it's harder for the person that gets 'found', the people looking have an inkling that they might be successful and be able to mentally prepare but for the 'found' person it must come as a bit of a shock to find a) they've been looking and b) you have been found by a TV show which you have to decide whether to appear on and it be watchable.

I was contacted by the team a few years ago. I declined the offer that they made for reasons of my own. I do love the show I think it's really well done. Last nights reunion was odd, I wondered if the mum was maybe struggling mentally ? It's a very hard situation to be in the middle of, patent or child.

It really is @Tweacle, it must be very surreal.

I thought Davina was wonderful last night her hugs (remember them!) seemed so heartfelt and plentiful. But on some episodes she doesn't hug people so much-I think she must be good at reading body language.

I wanted to hug the woman reunited with her sister. She was so lovely xx

All that locked in a cupboard stuff. She stayed with family and had a horrible upbringing. Her sister saying that her adoptive parents would have taken her in too had they known.

It's a guaranteed tear jerker alright. The pain people carry around is always crystal clear.

I have two adopted relatives who are late 40's/early 50s and both have had quite difficult paths in developing relationships with their bio mother. Neither will watch LLF because it always seems so perfect. I get that, and I guess I watch it with that in mind - what happens next? How do they go on from there? I can't imagine it's straightforward after the initial rush has gone.

The adopted parents in my family have always been so supportive of the reunions, there seems to be some mutual respect and understanding between the bio and the adoptive parents. It's kind of lovely and something a little primal.

I do worry about the biological parents who have spent their whole lives waiting for the reunion. Children who are 'found' are often living happy lives and may have no need to forge a new relationship with new people.

This episode really made me cry, especially the sisters. That poor woman, locked in a cupboard and feeling her grandfather’s fists. 😭