Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Telly addicts

Related: Film discussion forum.

Original poster

Honour - tonight and tomorrow on ITV1 at 9pm

51 replies

stumbledin · 28/09/2020 14:24

True story of the murder of Banaz Mahmod.

I hope it is done sensitively. Judging by the media coverage they think the story is about the police woman. And even if she is played by Keeley Hawes think that would be inappropriate.

OP posts:
ExclamationPerfume · 30/09/2020 21:51

They estimate at least one honour killing a week is happening in the UK.

Boredsilly · 30/09/2020 22:03

She was so young and the way she died, poor poor girl

JayAlfredPrufrock · 30/09/2020 22:09

The violence of her death 😰

In the universe where killing your child is somehow necessary wouldn’t you choose the least painful way?

purpleme12 · 30/09/2020 23:04

This is such a shocking and such a sad story

It really made me annoyed when they were trying to say the police officer perverted the course of justice and when that other one said she'd do exactly the same if it happened again!

Just so sad that they had to go into witness protection too

It did make me happy that they didn't give up in the end and the killers finally got Brian to justice. I just can't believe that she went 5 times for this!! And nothing happened!! Why??

purpleme12 · 30/09/2020 23:37

Banaz's sister had a boyfriend didn't she
So did he have to go into witness protection too?

Furries · 01/10/2020 00:17

Just finished watching this. Think it’s one of the most horrific and heartbreaking things I’ve seen for quite some time.

All I keep thinking about is how much I love my sister, and how much my mum has always been there for me (dad, non-entity really). I just cannot comprehend how honour killings are part of a culture. Current life is shit for all at the moment but, flipping heck, it’s another reminder for me of how bloody lucky I am to have my life and circumstances.

Was so sad to hear that her boyfriend took his own life, yet another casualty. I really hope that her sister and niece are safe and thriving in their new lives - how on earth do you get over your own family doing that?

Original poster
stumbledin · 01/10/2020 00:34

In this article it says that the family did want to bury Banaz Sad

" ... The legal consultant was Nazir Afzal, a former chief crown prosecutor, who had overall charge of the prosecution of those who plotted against and killed Banaz. He prosecuted more than 1,000 murders in his career, but recalls this case as uniquely gruelling. “We were working against the victim’s family, whereas normally you’d expect to be working with them,” he says. “They didn’t even want to bury her.” Afzal, the police and a charity bought a gravestone for Banaz and held a memorial service. “It’s the only time I’ve ever done that as a prosecutor.” ... "

www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2020/sep/24/murdered-for-wanting-a-life-banaz-mahmod-honour-killing-itv

OP posts:
Liddell · 01/10/2020 01:14

@purpleme12

Banaz's sister had a boyfriend didn't she So did he have to go into witness protection too?
At both trials, brave Rahmat gave evidence against his girlfriend's killers and had to be placed under police protection and assume a new identity.

However, Rahmat could not move on from Banaz's murder and the hole in his life that it left.

He said: "My life went away when Banaz died. There is no life. The only thing which was keeping me going was the moment to see justice being done for Banaz."
In 2016, 10 years after Banaz's so called 'honour killing' Rahmat was living in Poole, Dorset.

But on March 20 that year police were called to his home on March 20 after he sent a text to a neighbour saying he was going to kill himself and asking for officers to pick up his dog.

He was found alive and rushed to hospital where he died after five days in a coma.

Sources have revealed Rahmat had twice attempted suicide before. Once he was close to throwing himself off a bridge.

purpleme12 · 01/10/2020 07:52

I know what happened to Rahmat i was talking about Banaz's sister's boyfriend in my post.

lazymum99 · 01/10/2020 09:38

Someone upthread talks about a documentary that was on after this. What was it called. I can’t find it on catch up.

Furries · 01/10/2020 10:24

@lazymum99 - it was called Banaz An Honour Killing. Was an Exposure documentary originally shown in 2012.

lazymum99 · 01/10/2020 11:13

Thanks Smile

Vinosaurus · 01/10/2020 14:18

Just watched her sister's TEDx talk on youtube - harrowing. And the list of people in authority who could have raised the alert that didn't, just horrific. Was it all due to the fear of being accused of racial prejudice/cultural insensitivity?

here if anyone else wants to watch

BitOfFun · 01/10/2020 14:25

I read the book by the policewoman after watching. She was very clear on how the whole team took on Banaz as "our girl" and wanted to fight for her like she was their family, given how she'd been abandoned by her own.

The mother knew and was far more complicit than portrayed, according to tapped phone calls.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 02/10/2020 08:12

I think (hope) things may be improving re authorities? Not thinking of it as a cultural issue and understanding that it’s a violence issue is a step in the right direction. The mothers definitely know and imho are complicit by virtue of their silence and dogged defence of the men in their community. However so many of the women are isolated, unable to speak good enough English to be independent and it would take a monumental amount of strength to speak out. Which, tragically, Banaz’s mother didn’t do. I don’t want to move away from the fact that it was the men who killed Banaz but I suppose I have a gut feeling that her mother should have protected her. Thank god for strong women like Banaz’s sister and Caroline Goode.

Original poster
stumbledin · 02/10/2020 14:34

Banaz's mother did warn her that they were plotting against her, and suspect that even doing that felt like going against the "code of honour" that the family was part of.

And yes it is hard to imagine not going more, but then its a bit like when people ask a woman who is suffering domestic violence and coercive control "why didn't you leave".

Has anyone seen any articles or tweets or something that reflects how the Kurdish community feels about this series being shown?

And I think Banaz left but came back?

OP posts:
RightOnTheEdge · 02/10/2020 16:52

purpleme12 I wondered about her sister's boyfriend too.
When they were first in her flat there was a man there who didn't speak and she did get pregnant. I'm sure later on she said it was just her and her daughter so I think they must have split up or it wasn't serious. He was never mentioned.

purpleme12 · 02/10/2020 18:05

Oh right I thought they were still together.

Still even if they aren't together presumably he'd still want to see the baby... So would just him know who she really was and where even though she's under witness protection?? I'm confused about that now...

ageingdisgracefully · 03/10/2020 10:08

Does anyone remember the Shafilia(?) Ahmed case?

She was killed by her parents. Awful.

SavageBeauty73 · 03/10/2020 12:57

Just finished this. So heartbreaking. I can't believe she was raped before being murdered and that was sanctioned by her own father 😳

redvest · 04/10/2020 10:52

Heartbreaking. The video of that poor broken girl asking for help and just being shown the door, was shaming on the police.

Aridane · 05/10/2020 14:40

Horrific

Meredusoleil · 05/10/2020 21:39

She was treated worse than a piece of dog poo tbf. Like she said in her video, her husband treated her like a shoe and would wear her whenever he felt like it. That really got to me tbh!

These girls' lives are not their own. They have no freedom despite living in a so-called free country. Every step they take and every move they make is watched and reported back to the elders (the men in the family).

I'm so glad her sister got away and has started a new life without her 'family' stopping her. I'm also glad it was shown from the police angle as I don't think I could have coped with it from the victim's pov 😢

Also really gutted to learn that Rahmat killed himself. Are the men still in prison now and did they get life sentences, as I didn't see that mentioned after the verdict? I hope they rot in jail tbh.

The police team's dedication to the case was amazing. Imagine going all the way to Iraq ffs. She really wanted to try and right some if the wrongs the other police officers had caused before her.

But that stupid bitch that made out she had been asked to change her statement and would do the same again!!! I just wanted to slap her 😬

And her mum. I wanted to shake her and say wake up and do something to protect your daughter 😔

Aridane · 06/10/2020 00:47

Came here to see if there was a thread and thought there would be hundreds of posts.

I can’t believe the cousins / uncle raped and tortured her for a few hours before killing her. Surely ‘honour’ could have been achieved just by her murder?

And glad they managed to extradite x2 of her murderers from Iraq

Meredusoleil · 06/10/2020 06:36

@Aridane

Came here to see if there was a thread and thought there would be hundreds of posts.

I can’t believe the cousins / uncle raped and tortured her for a few hours before killing her. Surely ‘honour’ could have been achieved just by her murder?

And glad they managed to extradite x2 of her murderers from Iraq

I agree. This is why I say there is also power and control involved. They wanted to teach her a final lesson about daring to disobey her father's wishes!