Feral Families....anyone watching?

[DeloresJaneUmbridge]

DH is sat and muttering at the screen

Me...I am “live and let live” in attitude.

Would like them to revisit these kids as adults and see if they thought their upbringing was good.

I'm surprised at how judgemental/close minded the family with 7 kids seem to be...they come across as very scathing of those families who do choose school. I think if you want people to be open minded of your decisions you kind of need to do the same yourself.

I like that they are showing three very different families with different approaches.

I don't know, I think the mum of 7 seems fairly genuine if maybe a bit lacking in self-awareness. That oldest boy seems really thoughtful and I don't get the impression he'd be unduly swayed by his mum, he knows the decision is his to make. Even when she was talking about getting upset she still had a smile on her face, she wasn't crying and wailing.

I think all the kids are really nice kids.

I do worry for Archie. Like his Grandad said, he's 13 and hasn't got any 13 yr old friends etc.

The hairdresser mum is subtlety undermining the two who are trying School. Calling them 'Aliens' when they get home, worried that they will become 'boring'.

Yeah I agree Trampire - and talking about having to conform.

There’s a difference between home schooling and the “no rules” parenting approach. I don’t like that both are being lumped together.

I said exactly this on the other thread.

Restricted structure - that’s adult speak

The boy seemed to be more excited about school, I struggle to believe that not going to school has really been his decision

There's another thread?

That young boy saying he just wanted to be free and happy when he grew up... Great... Lovely... And who is going to be financing this life you and your siblings are being prepared for?

Hm, see 'most people aren't doing what's right for their family, they're just copying what their parents did'. That annoys me. It's arrogant really. The only reason people could choose a different lifestyle to hers is because they're following the crowd. Well, no actually. I bet she regularly uses the word 'sheeple'...

He seems like such a lovely boy. I'd like to believe he'll still learn a lot at home and be able to pursue his own interests and reading. He's the best advert of the lot for the no-rules approach!

And the fact he didn't want to go to school as 'shock horror' he'd have to do it everyday... Oh like going to work... I really wished the presenter had asked those questions of the parents..

He does seem like a nice & very bright kid

But a) he may not have to "go to work" every day depending on how he ends up earning a living, and b) if he gets into a career he has chosen and enjoys then doing it every day will be quite different than going to school, where a lot of stuff probably seems quite pointless and arbitrary to him.

I want good things for him!

I would have liked to have seen some of the times - of which there surely must be many - where the parents are exasperated at their children or doubting their choice in some way. It was painted as being very idyllic and perfect but I wanted to see the other side. I doubt the parents, or the children, think it's perfect all the time.

Yes Peanut - lots of wandering around in the sunshine. Bet it all looks a bit different in rainy old Autumn and Winter.

I think firstly stats about the rise in home ed are missing the point of how many children with sen’s are been failed by the system. The families picked are going to be the extreme family . A 13 year old unable to read and write is been failed . I am sure there are kids in school that parents put in place no rules . I also think home ed and no rules are separate issues

I too thought it was more about living a lifestyle that met the parents' needs today at great expense to the children's future.
I felt very sad for Archie and particularly his inability to read.
I don't know how anyone can manage to function in today's world if they can't read.
Depending on technology is fine until you can't get a signal or your battery goes flat.

I read an article once that likened boundaries for children to railings on a narrow bridge. If you were crossing a narrow bridge and it had no railings you would feel insecure and be cautious and unsure. If it had secure railings you could walk or run or dance your way across. And that's how life can feel for children. You don't want your boundaries to get in their way but equally if you give them none, you can create a sense of unease in them. So I'm always sure to have firm boundaries for my son but let him have freedom within them. (And obviously as he gets older the boundaries change and grow with him.)

I say that as an unschooling mother and I really do think my son is happier knowing that there are lines he can't cross and times that I will step in and make certain decisions that I feel protect his physical or mental well-being.

I was speaking to an old school friend who didn’t have many parenting boundaries and she said she really resented that and would’ve preferred a set bedtime/less chaos and more boundaries.
I think there has to be a balance of letting your children have some freedoms but also boundaries as well so they can feel secure. That’s whether they are home schooled or going to school. I could never Home ed as it’s just not ‘me’, but I can see why some do it & it’s fine if you socialise your kids at home ed groups etc. but not isolate them at home.?

It's true, I didn't have a bedtime and didn't have to do any household chores growing up (though there were other rules!). Every summer I'd go and stay with my cousins for a few weeks and I loved the routine of a chores rota, bedtime etc.

I remember once trying to give myself a 9pm bedtime at home, but I lay awake for ages and couldnt sleep so that didn't last long.

I’ve just switched on, is this about what Mum thinks is best for the kids or Mum just not wanting to let them go?

I think in the case of the Jessica's mum it was a case of mum cant be bothered her backside doing what's entailed in getting the kids to school. Everything she mentioned as a negative was something she'd have to put effort in on and it was only as an afterthought at the end of her list that she mentioned the wee girl and it not being good for her. I don't believe it. This was all about its not good for mum.

Archie how can he be home educated and not be able to read at 13 even if he does have a learning difficulty? There was just no effort put in on him and all mum could say was we'll be ok if there is civil war and he can play the drums.

The wee boy who decided not to go to school - wow what an intelligent kid he is and I wonder if flexi schooling could have worked for him? He was also a lovely young lad.

I did home educate one, my son who has profound learning difficulties so I am inclined to look at other home educators and be able to tell who's really doing it and who isn't.

The home education looks fab actually, learning about the world around them in a less formal way

How do we know what they knew about the world when all we saw was them out playing and making a sandwich or simple meal like other kids do?

I am inclined to look at other home educators and be able to tell who's really doing it and who isn't

That sounds really conceited. I should have said genuine home educators can look at other people claiming to be home educators and know who is and who isn't.