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Original poster

Anyone watching You Can't Take It With You about wills and guardianship?

25 replies

DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:22

Missed the start, but will have to get dp to sit down and watch on iPlayer as it's relevant to us, we struggle with this.

Am watching now anyway. Well-paced interesting stuff.

OP posts:
thehappyprince · 04/02/2011 21:25

Yes, am hoping they choose maternal grandparents!

Piccalilli2 · 04/02/2011 21:25

Can I just bask in reflected glory and say that my friend from school directed it!!
Very important subject though. Not enough people give any thought to what will happen to their kids if they die. It was actually a huge load off my mind when we finally sorted our wills.

Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:28

It's really well done, Pic

What is WITH him and the risk-averse bullshit [redwine]

The other ILs are hug-averse

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CarGirl · 04/02/2011 21:30

I just think both sets of grandparents look soooooooooooooo old - are they really the best choice????

My PILs are young but we've still gone with friends and I've even told them that I'm happy for them to go to foster carers if needs be!

bluesky · 04/02/2011 21:33

yes I'm watching, these grandparents will never agree, let alone talk to each other!! Very different. His mother is scary....

Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:35

The people we are thinking of asking are friends. Our solicitor said parents are a bad idea because of age, generally.

Which is handy cos we don't want any of our families Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:37

V v tricky for Sarah and Jason, who is quite hot btw

I think she is a bit U re her daughter's father

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Tinkerisdead · 04/02/2011 21:37

Oh I'll find this on inlayer. We need to sort our wills as we've asked friends to be guardians as we felt grandparents are too old and our siblings are useless!

Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:38

Oh my emoticons and strikeout attempts are ALL WRONG on this thread. Humph.

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Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:40

Those of you who asked friends, did you worry they would feel burdened by the request/unable to turn down? I worry about this.

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Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:43

Oh FGS Sarah is annoying me now. No, you cannot just pretend your daughter's father does not matter Hmm

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CarGirl · 04/02/2011 21:44

DirtyMartini - this is why I've been clear to my friends that I don't expect them to bring up my children, what I want them to do is to look out for my children's best interest. So much depends on their ages etc etc I have a few friends who possibly would offer, my PILs may offer who knows????? I had a few definates - they are not to live with my parents or brother, they are to stay together as unit - that's about it.

Sarah is a control freak I think!!!! If her eldest was in her teens she would probably vote with her feet.....

squashedfrogs · 04/02/2011 21:45

Watching this too. The second mother is totally missing the father's point of view.

Piccalilli2 · 04/02/2011 21:45

DirtyMartini, I did worry a bit, we asked friends who already have big family and I really worried about it, but we made it clear kids would be financially provided for and why we wanted them and they actually cried and said they felt honoured. It is a responsibility but it is also an affirmation of the friendship and how important they are to you. If you would do it for them if the time came, then why wouldn't hey do it for you? and if not, then they're probably the wrong choice.

MinnieBar · 04/02/2011 21:45

Oooh yes paternal granny is sucking on lemons ALL THE TIME isn't she?!

My solution there would be her mum to have them but they could go to his parents for 'risk-taking' Hmm holidays etc.

Yy to Jason although I want to pin him down and shave that stupid diddy-goatee thing off!

Relevant to us too. I suppose we'd ask my brother (nothing wrong with him btw) but it's just such a massive ask. And I feel slightly unfair as I suspect SIL has asked her sister, i.e. it's not a reciprocal arrangement.

LeninGrad · 04/02/2011 21:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:52

You sound pretty sorted Lenin, fancy having my two as well? Grin

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Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 21:53

Dear me yes, that goatee needs to go.

OP posts:
LeninGrad · 04/02/2011 21:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
DirtyMartini · 04/02/2011 22:08

Ah great!

Just noticed that MinnieBar's suggested solution was precisely what ended up happening. Nice work Min.

OP posts:
MinnieBar · 04/02/2011 23:00

Why thank you. I was also going to suggest what happened with the other couple too!

Tinkerisdead · 05/02/2011 17:01

Haven't caught the prog yet but just to say that we asked friends who are having ivf. We made it clear we weren't asking because of that, but explained that their values etc are so closely aligned to ours we just knew dd would thrive with them. They were honoured to be asked.

BeatrixRotter · 05/02/2011 17:16

That risk adverse guy is going to be very disappointed if the kids decide not to go backpacking when they grow up.

ChippingInSmellyCheeseFreak · 05/02/2011 17:30

I think most friends would find it a great honour. I did.

At one stage I was a nominated guardian to 7 kids from 4 families and on the odd occasion all parents would be together - so if there was some 'disaster' it would have been 'possible' to end up with all the kids in one go Grin eeeeekkkkk

ChippingInSmellyCheeseFreak · 05/02/2011 17:35

Jason is cute :) I'll pin him down while you shave off the goatie Grin

I wonder if Sarah is 'one of us'?

I can't believe she just wanted to over-ride Zoe's Dad and that she was so put out that she couldn't just say what she wanted to happen and that would be that... Hmm She came over as a right cow.

As for the others - no contest - Grandparents who would love them and give them lots of cuddles or frosty knickers!? I'm glad he finally saw sense - I love it that he even had to ask his parents if he could give them a hug... yet he wanted them to bring up his kids.... Hmm

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