INT. X-FACTORY DINING ROOM. DAY.
Rebeccchhha: "Ey ey ey, moooooornin' chuck. [nod nod nod] Ah'm jus' back from Liverpoooool. AMAYZIN'. [nod nod nod] So, it's the FAAANUL this week! 'Ow you bearin' opp?"
Little Chezza: [nursing cup of black coffee] "(Oh Jesus fuckin' Chroist loike.) Moornin'. Could yer speak a bit more quoiet-ly loike, safe, sorted, innit?"
Rebeccchhha: "But ey, ey, ey, Liverpooooool! The FAAANUL! It'll be AMAYZIN'. [nod nod nod] Doin' it fer me kids. Wanna thank everyone that voted fer me [nod nod nod]. Cheryl wuz there y'knooow. In Liverpoooool. For me."
Little Chezza: "Yeah, yeah, wotevurrr innit loike, cos oi is well street loike but oi as got a fuckin' 'ANGOVERR innit."
Rebeccchhha: "Did she coom ter see you in your 'owme town, chuck? [nod nod nod] Was it AMAYZIN'?" [nod nod nod nod nod]
Little Chezza: "Nah, oi fink... she were paintin' 'er nails or summat innit? Safe, give it up, check dis aht, loike." [does Downwards Pointy Rap Thing]
Rebeccchhha: "Ar ay, it were AMAYZIN' when she come to see me. Me kids were there. Ah'm doin' it fer me kids. Ave you got kids, chuck? Aw, noiw, ay fergot, ye're only twelve."
Little Chezza: "Yeah, wotevur? Oi 'ope when oi gets to your age oi can scrape me 'air back jus' loike that."
Rebecchhha: "Ey, ey, caalm down! [nod nod nod nod nod] Loooook, 'ere's the list of SONGS fer the last two in the FAAANUL!... What? Ar AY!... Bloomin' eck!"
Little Chezza [snatches list]: "Oh, dat is well wicked. Foight Fer Yer Roights Ter Partee, Whoite Loines Don' Do It Loike, an' Turn Moi Swag Ahhhn That Keri 'ilson Vershun! Sorted, safe."
Rebeccchhha: "Ar ay, Cheryl tol' me it were gonna be Ferry Cross The Meeeeeersey an' 'ey Jude."
Little Chezza: [slaps Rebeccchhha's forehead] "Taught oi everythin' oi knows, she did. Oi is ghetto innit. Safe." [walks off cackling insanely]