what would you do with this behaviour...

[CRAZYCREW]

I thought would ask on here and i dont know what taliban music sound like it is what the school told his father...

It is not for me but a child minded child I used to look after. H eis boy of 11. His mother died when he was three and the father raised him a lone and done a fantastic job to be honest and he has a secure home but he runs circles around his father....

the story so far.. I helped the father appeal to get his son into a good school where my children attend. he has only been there since Sept and has been banned fro the school bus for palying taliban music, answering the bus driver back and swearing also. H eha salso bullying at school and is generally very naughty.
Last week I had arrnaged to take him out and his father was going to give me £30 for the trip and going to theme park and when he went to the bank (his father) there was no money in. The boy has ordered a x box controller of amazon in his emaila ddrss and an x box from game .com. this totalled £150...
His father had also won him an x box on ebay local for £60 but he could not pay for this either due to this fraud. This was all last wek and in the morning the father is going to collect the x box and the boy has just tole me he can have it and play with it.

I have told the man it is serious and needs steming in the bud now. The mans steps children from his late wife were naughty and went to bad boy schools and stole from relatives and i dont want to see this lovely boy... always polie with me go bad but as an outsider i canm only guide bhis father and do so much.

I am being to firm telling his fther he should not get to play on the x box for 4 weeks and ground him for 2 weeks say... what would you do in this situation.

Has the father asked for your advice?

I would in future not do anything for this child that leaves you out of pocket, unless you are prepared to lose the money.

The boy's behaviour is very worrying but he is not your responsibility and you have said your piece already.

yes he has asked what can be done to help but to be honest I have given up now as told him how I would trat the situation but jsut does not listen at all. I had him for 5 years when little and he was so good. He has two biological brothers that stealed and robbed from family members so you wonder if it is in the blood dont you to be honest if you know what I mean and dont mean it nastily either but both of them ended up going to speacil schools etc..

Thanks for replying.

I'd suggest that he gets the police round to scare him. They'd talk about the fraud being a criminal offence etc, how if he gets a record he'll find it difficult to get a job, etc.

If that doesn't set him straight, I don't know what would tbh

Of course, you are absolutely right - the boy should not have the x-box for 4 weeks. The father is nuts if he's still planning to give it to the kid. Perhaps he's trying to bribe him into behaving.

Not sure what else you can do.

So what happened about the theme park? Did you take the boy?

P.s. I agree with Mumblechum.

hello there no we did not know anything about it last Friday so I ended up taing my sons and this boy to a ball pool and he acted all innocent and acted upset. His father has been good and grounded him all weekend but he was going to let him play out Saturday.

I dont have much to do with the family at all but used to childmind him u`ntil about 2 years and lived quite local until he moved a year ago. The father for some reason is always ringing me to say what to do etc.... lol. My daughter has just done socialogy and she says it is far too late to change behaviour.. what do you people think.

I think the thing that gets me is that he is still not admitting it. I thought he had but it was done at 1 am in the morning and the next day the fathers card was out of his wallet.

Also his father said a few week prior an x box game appeared and he said it must have been sent by mistake and to hold on to it but dont open it in case needed to go back and he has now been able to keep it so find that so wrong to. I find it all terible now and feel I as a normal person cannot help no more as he still thinks his son is a golden boy and just dont understand it.

I thought the Taliban tried to ban all music.

I think you are going to have to do tough love on the Dad.
Either he stands up to the boy or his son is going to end up in prison. But if he isn't going to act on your advice then don't give him any. And tell him why.
He needs to confront the boy and carry out punishments. If he is too scared to then he will just have to put up with the consequences. You could find out a local parenting course, and leave the details with the Dad. But it is up to him to do something.