Caught my 14 year old son smoking cannabis again

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I posted on here a few months ago that I found out my son had been smoking cannabis. My husband had a word with him and he was completely honest and had a good chat with his dad and said he wouldn't do it again and there weren't any major punishments.

He didn't come home when he was supposed to on one of the coldest and snowiest nights before Christmas - he was wandering the streets with two friends and he reeked of the stuff.

We grounded him for a month and took his phone off him.

I've been looking at old posts on mumsnet re cannabis and the general opinion seems to be "Oh they all do it, it's a phase and it will pass".

The problem is I've got a relative who is a heroin addict and he started off with cannabis at age 12/13.

I can't have anything but a zero tolerance approach when I have seen everything he and his family have been through.

I'm sure most of these people who say don't worry about it's normal have not had personal experience of serious drug addiction.

I never took drugs of any kind when I was younger as I just wasn't interested so my only experience is my relative and it's just not acceptable to have my 14 year old son coming home reeking of cannabis.

I really don't know what to do. I seem to recall that Custy reckons what will be will be regardless of how lenient or strict you are with your kids on this issue.

All music he listens to has drugs related references in it but I suppose a lot does these days and it just glamourises it.

Chris this is horrible.

I am afraid that I have no useful statements to make but I do feel very very sorry that your sons are into this.

Maryz - have you heard about Debra Bell's book - The Cannabis Diaries. You can google her name - there is also her website called talkingaboutcannabis.com or .co.uk.

She doesn't run an advice line as such but you can get in touch with her and have a chat on the number on her website.

I don't think it's possible to ring her up for a chat - it looks like its £50 a time!!

Her diaries are on her website.

I caught my daughter too but as she was so cunning, I tested her with a cannabis urine test, cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=191050759958&ssPageName=ADME:L:LCA:GB:1123

help needed what do you do when you find out your 13 year son smokes weed!! he doesn't listen to anyone and said it is the only thing that makes him happy and it is fun. We have done the drug talk many times and they are giving him this at school, I feel so out of control as I can't do anything about it. I'm not giving him any money but he is still managing to get some....

I feel for you.. I was this kid. Not just briefly, seriously. Failed all my exams, stole from family, missed (purposely) all family events, stayed out on cold nights near Christmas getting stoned. It will take time for him to realise, he probably has already but can't get out of the vicious circle , it won't necessarily go into serious drug addiction, more so a waste of these few teenage years, money, brain capacity. It left me short of common sense, and embarrassed about how air headed I actually was after 2 years of constantly smoking weed!

It will take him to one day get out fresh headed, get bored of day in day out smoking and wasting money, start spending money on nice things for himself instead of this habit. It is psychologically addictive unfortunately

It Is fun when you're that age...when you're hanging out in the park getting stoned with your friends and tbh it is filling something that is missing. They are the type of kids that when they start to drink alcohol in a few years they'll drink that bit more just to feel "okay" they could be missing something emotionally. Self esteem, over thinking, always boils down to mental issues. They can't be talked out of it, they have to get bored of it themselves unfortunately.

I have zero tolerance for "weed", but not because its illegal etc. But because it damages teenagers brains. I've been very upfront in educating my son about this. All the research shows this. If he decided in his 20s to try a joint at a party that is one thing, but at 12/13/14 it can cause long-term damage.

Did you talk to him about this aspect, OP, rather than it just being "wrong"? That its dangerous for his mental health and mental development. I was just wondering?

Our 15 year old DS is smoking cannabis. He admitted he was smoking when I challenged him in February. He has adhd and his behaviour has been challenging for the last year. We've had to call the police out twice for violent behaviour.

At times it's felt overwhelmingly depressing. He has zero motivation for school and is ata temporary school to try and help his behaviour.

He is getting external support for drug use. We cannot ground him as he becomes violent and abusive which is affecting our 10 year old Dd. He knows we love him andxwsnt to support him getting off cannabis but that we do not condone its use and will not give him money.

We are paying for private psychology support for him to boost his self-esteem and emotional well being in the Hope that this may help him in stopping smoking

How difficult Hawks.

I don't think ADHD and cannabis go well together. As far as I know (maybe check with drugs counsellor) there is a self-medicating/attraction aspect between ADHD and cannabis. They might feel cannabis "calms" them down. But it is also a dangerous drug especially for anyone with any mental health condition or vulnerability.

Have you heard anything about this?

THIS THREAD IS 7 YEARS OLD - BIG FAT ZOMBIE ALERT

TeenTan yes, you're absolutely right. There is undoubtedly an element of self medication, as well as being tied into him being a risk taker as part of the ADHD.

One thing we are grateful for is, that he does still talk to us! So we know what he is taking and can then try and support him as best we can!

I actually think cannabis is ok... for adults, at his age it will be damaging his brain, there is plenty of research to show how it damages the in developed brain. So zero tolerance!