I don't think my sister has any intentions of doing anything when she leaves school

[MrsSnape]

I'm worried about my sister (again). She leads such a dull, boring, depressing life. She's almost 15 and has NO hobbies or interests, never goes out, doesn't have any friends...all her mind consists of is school (which she hates) and home (where she spends all her time watching videos on youtube.

She has nothing to look forward to, nothing to make her happy...

We were wondering what she would do when she leaves school. When asked, she just shrugged her shoulders. My mum said "what about this animal college, it looks lovely" so sister said "yes ok" So my mum suddenly got it into her head that my sister "has her heart set" on this college. She phoned up and got all the leaflets and brochures for her...this was 6 months ago and sister hasn't even looked at them yet, they're all still in the envelope.

Her dad came home from work early one day and said "its open night at that animal college so I got home early so we can go and have a look" and sister replied with "no I don't want to, I have headache".

She has no intentions of going to college or doing anything else. Has anyone else had experience of a teen with such a dull outlook on life?

Is she depressed?

she sounds a bit like me at that age, I had not a clue about anything. parents just railroaded us into A levels, which was a good thing as I wouldnt have done anything left to myself.

she has plenty of time to wake up and go to college though. Maybe a year in the workplace would give her some ambitions?

I know you've talked about your sister before, and she sounds very low and uninterested in life, though I'm in no position to say if she's actually depressed. Do her parents go out to work, or is she just used to the idea that you go on benefits and don't have to actually do anything in life? Many people her age don't have much of a clue what they'd like to do, but maybe you could start getting into her head that she'll have to either stay on at school, go to college, or get a job - that might stop her thinking that she can just drift and not do any of those things!

I think she is seriously depressed. Has she tried her GP?

Hmm, are you me? This could be my sister, you can CAM me if you want, or CAT, or whatever it's called!

I know what I think would be good but I don't know the cost so it might not be an option as I expect it is pricy.
I would take her right out of her comfort zone and book her on an Outward Bound course for a week! My DS did it at that age, but he won a bursary and it didn't cost anything, except the journey there. He didn't know anyone, but you bond pretty quickly in that sort of situation. It is very good for self esteem and the leaders are used to dealing with all sorts.
I think they will have to be more forceful. If her Dad got home early to go to the animal college he shouldn't have taken 'no' for an answer.

Have you asked her what she wants to do? It might be that she has crusty old careers teachers and they're not really helping.

Has she had any work experience or tried a taster day at college?

I think that you have to be cruel to be kind. My mother has a cousin with a daughter like that and they have sheltered her at home. She works but is a virtual recluse, her father has now died and her mother is now getting elderly and she will have to cope alone before too long. They have been very protective but it hasn't been best for the long term-it would be much better if they had insisted on her getting a place of her own etc.

Your poor sister.

You could force her to get an interest because she won't do it herself, so i guess just keep pushing her and remind her she can't stay at home all her life.