Mental Health

[Swissroll12]

Hi my dd is in 2nd year of uni and while she tells me she’s happy & has good friends she has dark thoughts not suicide . I had a chat with her recently but she’s reluctant to open up and just said she wakes up daily feeling down with no joy in her life , I advised her to speak to her tutor at uni and a referral was made to the uni councillor .

i believe that she’s had a few sessions the councillor has said that she needs to see her Gp as my dd could be suffering with one of these Bipolar , ADHD or Autism 😮
My dd has told me that these dark thoughts started during lock down when she was at home 24/7

Anyway I spoke to dd today and advised that maybe she should see the Dr .

Tbh I’m not sure how to deal with this I’m worried sick she’s 19 but I want to support her but scared I’m going to say the wrong thing .
Any advice from parents please ?

Can you visit your dd? Would this help? Yes, she needs to see a GP but it’s hard to do that. I was depressed at university and would love to have had the physical support from my mum. As is, I got that by going to see the GP by myself. And like your dd, things had been difficult for a long time.

Just give her lots of support and love, sending her little things, physical stuff beyond texts can help her to keep connected. Things like a physical letter, a little treat food parcel, a sentimental ornament for her room perhaps.

Thankyou so much for your reply , I do all of what you’ve suggested , I send her little gift vouchers , tell her that I love her daily & that I’ll always be here for her if she wants to talk but she won’t open up on whatever is on her mind , I’m just praying that nothing terrible has happened , I have asked her but she said no , she said to me yesterday that she needs to to see our Dr , I’m not sure if she wants anti depressants? I’ve asked if she’s happy at uni with her course and uni and she said yes

We never pushed her to go to uni it was completely her choice but I’m worried sick as this mental health issue is ongoing . My oh doesn’t help he doesn’t understand and thinks we all get down days and to crack on which to a certain degree is true but I think my dd has been feeling low for a long time

So she knows she has you as a rock. And I think your dd has opened up to you to a certain extent. She’s told you about her mood and thoughts. And even if she can’t vocalise them, which from what you’ve said about your relationship is more likely than she won’t iyswim, she knows you’ll always be there if she needs you.

Is she coming home at Easter? I think doing something with her, taking her places in the car, driving around are often non confrontational ways of getting our dc to open up. Or her driving you around. Often less is more and it’s just knowing the right thing to say to get them to relax a bit. She knows you love her so a conversation doesn’t need that to be prominent when you’re next together. The softly softly approach is often a lot better than telling her you’re worried (I’ve had to learn that with my dd). And maybe she will say something more.