Friendships and 14 year old girls

[Ohgoonthenanotheronefortheroad]

Is it 'normal' for 14 year olds who one day are really close to their two friends, hanging out, sleepovers etc to being completely excluded in the following few days?

My daughter is currently going through this and is distraught. Worried about what she is going to do at school tomorrow for lunch etc. I can't believe the ruthlessness of it. She has asked the girls what's wrong and if she has done anything but they have said no but continue to ignore her and give her dirty looks at school etc.

Not sure what I'm looking for except maybe some stories of people that have been through this and that it will pass as I am catastrophising here thinking the worst 🙈I daughter is currently in a panic about what to do tomorrow at lunchtime and is concerning sitting in the toilets on her own 😔

It is within 'normal' yes unfortunately. Is there a pastoral person at school who can help her with this? Would she go to them in the morning and explain and say she's worried? In my experience girls can get carried away with this sort of drama but it only takes a little intervention from someone neutralish to make then realise they don't really want to be hurting their friend's feelings, whatever has happened.

And yes it will pass. Hugs though, it's horrid for both of you.

Yes, girls can be completely vile to each other, as can fully grown up women. Surely you know this from being on mumsnet!!

Yes unfortunately it is normal. Your poor daughter, girls can be such bitches. Support your daughter and honestly encourage her to find new friends. They are not nice girls to treat your daughter like this.

Thank you everyone. We have a meeting with her pupil support teacher through the week regarding something else but my daughter doesn't really want to speak to the teachers at all. I think it might meet the teacher slightly earlier just to give her a heads up on what's happening.

I have been encouraging her to make new friends since she started high school as I don't think these girls are nice people generally and certainly haven't been treating her kindly at points up until now. She's very much of the opinion that everyone has their friend groups and she can't just join a new one. One of her friends is very much the queen bee who has 'influence' over lots of other girls. Luckily, my daughter does lots of hobbies and has friends from other schools but I'm concerned about what will happen in school.

One of them got in touch this morning to ask for help with homework - the cheek of it.

I just can't get over how people can be so cruel to others, although no, I shouldn't be surprised given lots of Mumsnet posters and I suppose the state of the world just now 😞