DS16: I think he’s scared to leave school

[Mum2Fergus]

…despite the fact he’s totally outgrown the place. Currently S6 (Scotland) studying 5 Highers. I’ve been talking to him about next year and wanting to start college applications. He’s, in my mind, trying to put blockers in the way (it’s too far, doesn’t like the building, blah blah). He’s not interested in S6. I do genuinely think it the idea of leaving what he’s known for so long…and not sure how to get him over this hump. Let’s be honest, the big wide world outside of school is a pretty scary place …I personally hate adulting 😂 but I needs to be done.

Well he can’t just sit around all day. Time for tough love. He makes the applications or you’ll be expecting £300 a month rent and board by September.

Im assuming hes a late birthday my Dd was a February and by the time she got to 5/6th year I could see why parents defer them. they are young
what does he want to do what are his highers? He will need to start applying in January wont he maybe a modern apprenticeship would suit him better, it is daunting but he will be fine they will be getting career stuff at school and applying advice in Guidance classes i wouldn't push him too much be guided by school, does he have a p/t job or volunteer this also prepares them for leaving.

He’s signed up to do an evening course (post Highers) in barbering. His real passion is theatre/acting…so the barbering route is with a view to giving him an income with the flexibility he needs for theatre/acting work. I fully support his ambitions…but acknowledge he needs to take a bit more ownership.

No job as yet but am looking at volunteering options for him.

He sounds focused and organised but a teenager so he is a walking contradiction, my dd went to city of Glasgow to do an arts course she doesn't work in them now but I think it helped her to develop and mature.

See if there is any Saturday acting classes or theatre groups he can volunteer at.

He goes to drama school every weekend, has done for a number of years. We’re in a city so a few theatres which we keep looking to see if anything is going.

There are some acting courses at various colleges I think. Why wouldn't he apply for one of those?
Can you support a gap year with the proviso he has to have a job?
Barbering sounds good. I know of one boy who is a musician but also a barber. It keeps him going if gigs dry up.

Exactly this, why doesn’t he want to do the applications. I’ve found 3 colleges that all do HNC/HND relevant courses, 2 local-ish one a bit further afield…but whenever I try to sit him down to do the actual applications he’s shying away from it…as if not wanting to leave the school network. And I don’t know why…his main friend group left at end of S4 so it’s not that.

He is frightened its normal so he will procrastinate,

Are there any drama courses he's interested in? An evening course in acting would be good alongside the barbering?
Has he done anything in local am dram theatre, any acting gigs? or has he a showreel?

It's good he has a passion and trying to make it as an actor while doing barbering as a day job isn't the worst aspiration.

What about trades where there could be a crossover. Thinking electrical for stage lighting, carpentry for scene building etc. A course to learn the basics would be a useful thing?

DH is a musician and he couriers during daytime, similarly, it gives him the flexibility to do the music side of things.