So, our son is 19, he recently sat his A levels with 3 passes but mediocre results. He's on a year out at present and working on a building site, whilst he tries to decide what to do with his life.
We don't want to push him Ito university unless there's something he really wants to do as I know he'll not work at it or drop out. He was diagnosed with ADHD this year. He was put on Elvanse 60mg shortly before his exams but once they were over he stopped taking them as they were messing with his sleep patterns and he felt he wasn't 'himself' on them. I need to arrange a review with the psych.
Now I know this is a stressful time for him but smoking weed in his bedroom and appearing stoned on the stairs when we smelt it is just unacceptable. My DHs brother recently died of alcoholism at 52 and our worry is that our son is exactly like him in so many ways. No direction, no ambition, always does what his friends are doing... but SO stubborn and will not listen to anyone else. He's bright (though his results don't really reflect that), sporty, good with people and has a good work ethic but we really don't know what to advise him to do. He's toying with going into the police. Perhaps the routine and rigour will suit him. I can't see him sat in a desk job.
Anyway, before he embarks on anything I feel like we need to address the ADHD/ addiction issues. He loves drink, smoking, Monster drinks, vaping and any substance that changes his mood. How on earth can you make a stubborn 19 year old see sense??? Counselling? Stronger rules/boundaries (he's an adult!). Any advice gladly received...