Trainers 13yr boy

[RhubarbAndMustard]

DS13 has just started gaining independence and went with friends on a shopping trip to buy some new trainers with his birthday money.

He’s bought..with their approval..£100 New Balance trainers.

A week later, friends are now saying they don’t like the trainers. DS came up to me saying ‘I think I made a mistake’ and then got upset that he’s wasted money on trainers that he now won’t wear.

Whilst I’d love him to just wear what he likes, I also appreciate he’s 13 and this is really important to him right now. He’s not a confident lad and what his friends say will matter. Before I try to re-sell, does any parent have trendy teenagers that could say of these are a definite no in teenage world right now or are they actually fine please? Pic attached.

I have a teenage boy but he is quite happy in his walking boots, so can't offer trainer style advice as such.

But - what trainers will he get instead? What if his "friends" (who sound like stirrers tbh) decide they don't like them either? What do these "friends" wear on their feet? Does he still like these ones?

I wouldn't suggest forcing him to wear stuff that makes him a laughing stock, but I would advise a bit of caution before replacing ££ trainers every time "friends" say they don't like them. I get what you're saying about him not being very confident but spending £100 every time other kids say they don't like something he wears isn't sustainable throughout his life, and isn't going to help him learn how to handle this sort of meanness.

Your poor son, his friends don’t seem very nice.
For what it’s worth, my 15yo who’s very into his clothes and trainers likes those NB and would happily wear them. A few of his friends have them. He wears mainly Adidas Spezials (sp!) for leisure, or Air Force Ones. For sport, he’s got Nike Pegasus.
My 13yo wears Air Force Ones. Various styles of Nike seem to be popular amongst his friends.

My 18 year old just bought himself those exact trainers and he is quite fashion conscious BUT that doesn't really matter if your DS's friends have declared them to be not in them nothing anyone says on Mumsnet is going to change his feelings on them I think it's a tough lesson to learn for him but unfortunately teenagers have always been this way.

Stick them on Vinted? There are always trainers on sale on Sports Direct website, you could get a pair of Adidas/Nike (e.g. Spezial/Gazelle/AF1) for far less than £100 and I’m fairly sure they’re acceptable.

I think the issue here isn’t so much the trainers as what the trainers demonstrate - how much control do his “friends” have over your son? Are they actual friends or are they bullying him? Is he going along with what they are telling him to curry their favour as he thinks it will increase his popularity with them?

New Balance is a good brand, worn a lot by teens. My DS17 wears the joggers and hoodie etc. id look online for people wearing them that your DS would look up to. He needs to realise that he hasn't wasted his money!

Thank you everyone, that’s exactly the kind of 3rd party validation I was looking for. If I say they are fine that’s not going to carry much weight.

I don’t think his friends are bullies, just typical insensitive 13 year olds who haven’t learnt how mean their words can be.

I’ll show him some of these comments. Thank you so much.

My ds friends wouldn’t have done that to him, I don’t agree that’s normal 13 year old behaviour. Keep an eye on the peer pressure.

Pass remarkable wee arseholes.

I’d sell them on Vinted as a one off and let him spend what you make on new ones. Life can be tough as a teen, being a sheep is no bad thing to get through secondary school.

oh I feel for him and you op.

My son is 13 and will only wear nikes - we get them on Vinted as they are cheaper that way - the last pair we bought were a bargain, brand new condition at about a quarter of retail price.

I can't say whether or not any particular 13 year olds would wear new balance - what do his friends wear? Do you konw any of the parents or do you see the boys come round?

I don't see my sons friends that regularly but i would feel able if I did to bluntly say - look, what's the cool shoe right now...(bearing in mind I know they would think im a cringe old lady !)

I'd be a bit concerned that the friends are being mean - but I also think it's VERy normal for their to be a strict consensus in a social group on what trainers are acceptable!!

I would also get him a different pair if you can- it's tough being a teen.

tbh I'm not sure anything anyone says here is useful - there will be a 'cool' range of shoes socially among kids he knows and that is that.

I remember 'fila' trainers being the absolute saddest possible option when I was at school and one friend of mine trying to throw hers in a bin she was so embarassed.

At 13 anything Nike or Adidas is fine, whilst there are ‘cooler’ options with each of these brands they are mostly all ok at that age it’s about fitting in and not being noticed. He’ll get his own style in a few years

i think what is ‘trendy’ varies from area to area. My DS is 13. Trendy boy trainers (here) are Nike (not air force ones) and on cloud. Nothing else apparently. Mine has some black on clouds and some Nike air max ones.

your DS friends sound a bit mean to tell him to get the trainers then say they don’t like them. Does DS like them? If so tell him to keep wearing them. New balance is a good make

I like the shoes very much, I think New Balance ones are really trendy, or certainly are around these parts. Along with standard Nike, Adidas and Vans. My son and his friends often wear Crocs! And I’ve seen a few in walking style boots.
foot note, his friends sound like twits!

Agree your son’s friends sound mean. Nike trainers are what most seem to wear near me (mainly AF1s).