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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Rules for boyfriend

3 replies

helpnavigateteens · 14/09/2025 21:55

Last year my daughter was 16 and had her first boyfriend. We agreed a rule with her that they would leave her bedroom door open when they were in her room. She was happy with it. When we've talked about sex and relationships we've acknowledged that some teens will experiment early but discussed the benefits of being a bit older and encouraged her to wait until she is more mature.

She's now 17 and has a different boyfriend of maybe a couple of months only. He was here this evening and we realised her door was closed. I feel like the age difference from last year is significant and while I'd rather she wasn't doing anything sexual yet (in a new relationship) I also am aware of the argument that it's better they are safe inside than looking for less safe places elsewhere.

She is my oldest so this is new to me and her Dad. What have others done at this age, in terms of boundaries, and what has then been your experience?

Thanks for any thoughts.

OP posts:
HollyIvy89 · 14/09/2025 22:05

I have a pillow outside the room that goes in between the door when they in there. I expect at his house they don’t have same rules but I can only make rules for my own home and even with the door open I know things happen!! Where there’s will…
i have had the chat with both her and him but who knows if they listen to me. It’s tricky!

mamagogo1 · 14/09/2025 22:07

I must admit I gave up policing by 17, you have to trust them. My dd is now living with that same boyfriend many years later!

autienotnaughty · 14/09/2025 22:10

I stopped policing at 18 until then door a jar and no stopovers. Once over 18 steady bf couhh K d stay no ons!!

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