Should my DS move sixth form?

[SassyBear2]

My DS16 has just started a new grammar for sixth form. He was at another grammar for secondary (which was a decent school but nothing special) and got 10 grade 9s in his GCSEs. His results came from the work he did at home, as he didn’t listen much in lessons and often had to catch up later using YouTube and other resources.

Most pupils at his old school were chilled and relaxed. He didn’t revise much compared to his peers and doesn’t like talking about schoolwork. He had a good group of friends and was popular. My son really likes humour and taking the piss, and so he had two friends at his old school who matched his personality. He set up pranks with them that I found concerning. Things like spraying fart spray around school or hiding speakers and playing noises in assembly. It didn’t affect his grades because he did it outside lessons, usually at break, but I do think he needs to understand what school is really for. Most of his teachers liked him and say hes well mannered and is a good student though.

He applied to one of the top state schools in the country for sixth form and got in. He’s only been there three days but already says he doesn’t like it. He’s come home quite down and has been complaining that the school is full of “nerds”. Part of me wonders if a new crowd might be a good thing and might push him to focus more rather than messing around.

It’s very early days, so too soon to make any big decision, and we’ve already bought his uniform. Switching back quickly would mean buying another set. I want him to be somewhere that challenges him and sets him up well, but I also don’t want him unhappy.

Are teachers usually better at the top schools? At his old one he often complained about the teaching and just caught up at home, but there’s no reason for him to waste time not learning in class if he could be taught properly. My DS is asking me for advice so what's your take?

TL;DR: DS16 got 10 grade 9s mainly from self-study as teaching wasn’t great at old grammar. He’s now at a top sixth form but after 3 days says he doesn’t like it and complains it’s full of “nerds”. Old school had friends and pranks (sometimes concerning) but less focus. Should I encourage him to stay, and are teachers generally better at top schools?

He sounds awfully immature, to the point I would be a bit concerned. If he doesn’t smarten his act up quickly then sixth form/A levels will be a disaster no matter where he is - the jump from GCSEs is huge. If his old school tolerated that ridiculous behaviour then I will hedge my bets and say that it’s not a great school. DD’s high performing grammar would’ve had them suspended for less!

No, I would not be switching him back to a lesser sixth form just so he can prank around with fart spray.

I'd say in response to the nerds comment "great, maybe you can learn from them, what fab opportunity this is for you". And tell him to piss about with his mates once he's done his work.

thats my argument...

he claims its a work life balance

That sounds like an atrocious Grammar school. You'd have been better off sending him to the local non selective state school.
Anyway. It sounds like he's a bit too immature for post 16 schooling. Maybe send him to a college?

I would be encouraging him to stick it out for another two weeks, and growing up a bit.

Sounds like hes to immature for sixth form, send him to a local college.

Going against the grain here, I think if he managed 10 grade 9s with not great teaching then he's capable of achieving anywhere. I'd listen to him and see about the swap. How many of us as adults have known within a few days we've made a mistake with a job or something? School is too big a part of a teenagers life to be unhappy if there are other options. And feeling like the other kids aren't your tribe is a big deal IMO.

Mmm, do you think 2 weeks would make a difference?

bump

I don't know for OP but for my YP it was enough to go from tears to making some friends and then having the best years of schooling. It has also made them more confident going to university more confident in their ability to make friends from scratch. So yes two weeks might be enough to settle down.

I don't

Why did he want to move in the first place?

Well obviously it depends on the child and their motivation to adapt and make friends. A levels are hard and if you don't have a peer group interested in studying, plus more independent study time to develop pranks, I would be encouraging at least another two weeks and going to some clubs, getting involved in the school, really trying to make some friends. My hesitation in advocating for longer than two weeks is that moving back becomes harder the longer it is left because the syllabus might be different or approached in a different order.

Yes that's true

He sounds very immature. I am going to tell you about ds24, 13 A* at GCSE, found it all very easy, not great at revision, could just turn up and do well. Went to do a levels and thought he could do the same and he got a huge shock as they are such a huge step up, you have to consistently work etc. he bombed his AS levels and it was awful. Your ds needs to grow up but also realise that a levels are different and I suspect it is nit the school but the level of work expected that he does bot like.

I would be having a blunt conversation do you want better teaching so you have the best chance of the best grades ( which are much harder to get through self study at A level) or do you want to mess about with your mates for the next 2 years and possibly not get into the university you would like to.
But he does sound immature and this is part of the growing up he needs to do.

He does sound like he might get into trouble if goes down his prank route at this school. He is possibly called people nerds as he has not found partners in crime.
Before I read op properly I was thinking change fine ( I did myself from a technical college to a school sixth-form way back in the 80s). However, I think giving another week whilst you discreetly check out other options probably way to go.
My youngest just started a large sixth-form college. It is hugely respected. He has come from a school where he was top of the tree academically. He is finding it a learning curve finding firmly not so at this college. He too used the word nerds! However, I am encouraging him to stick it out and he can see probably 'good' for him though somewhat disconcerting.

A levels require a different skill set to gcse. The people who excel at A level are often different to gcse
Teaching at grammar schools is often poor and lazy because they xan fet away with it as the pupils and their parents are motivated.

@SassyBear2 I’m still intrigued why he wanted to move to this new school originally? Was it parent pressure and now simply mildly rebelling and moaning? Do they offer differing courses so a move back wouldn’t be ideal? Is it because the new school gets better results? I’d remind him why he wanted to move in the first place and to give it a chance and get over himself.