DD’s make up

[Lokilo]

My DD is a beautiful 18 yr old but she ruins herself with her terrible make up when she goes out. She is sensitive so myself and DH don’t say anything although we do give her lots of compliments when she is less made up. I know it’s her life etc but we can’t help feel it is a shame and wonder how others would tackle it? Do we just say nothing and let her do her thing? She also dyes her hair and it doesn’t suit her. But she’s an adult I know.

What is there to “tackle”? She’s an adult.

Yabvu...leave her to it. She's an adult but also a teenager and teenagers do things like this. Why would you bring it up? Leave her be

Look at her objectively. Do you just not like the makeup, or is it actually terrible?

Leave her alone. I wouldn't tackle this at all.

Say nothing. Im sure she will cringe in years to come when she looks back at photos. Maybe as a Christmas or birthday present you could buy her a voucher to have a professional make up done.

Always remember my dad saying when I was that age (late 1980s) that if I was doing an A level in make up, I would get amazing grades. I literally spent hours doing mine. 🤣

You could get her some make up lessons maybe?!

I'd say absolutely nothing. My dd went through a stage at 18 of what I called the 'Towie' look which appeared to me to be inch thick foundation, massive amounts of contouring, black eyebrows, fake eyelashes, etc. It's not to my taste. I never said anything other than how nice she looked.

My mother (late 80s) is still being an utter twat to me every time I visit by commenting critically on my hair, my clothes, my weight. I vowed never to do it to my kids.

Do you not look back on teenage photos of yourself and think ‘what the fuck was I thinking?’ I do.

It’s a rite of passage. Leave her to it.

Is it terrible as in quantity, technique or choice of colours/product?
Is her makeup similar to other people her age?

She’ll get over it. I had terrible hair and make up between 19-20 and then it gradually got better (I hope!), still look at photos and cringe. Don’t say anything, if you really want to do something give her some make up lessons or treat her to some nice make up from a make up artist in boots but definitely frame it as a gift because you know how much she enjoys make up not because of how she looks.

perfect suggestion @Leoari with Christmas just around the corner.

She obviously likes her products so such a gift won't seem so "pointed"

Don’t get her lessons, she’s following the trend, she’ll look back and think wtf.

How would you want your daughter to 'tackle' it if she thinks your hair and make up are a bit shit? What would you think was the appropriate way for her to say 'mum, I think that colour looks hideous on you'?

Ok thanks for the comments.

Oh I feel your pain here! We have had the same issue. I have tried to gently suggest that she tones it down in the past, because she is so stunning with zero or minimal make up, but it obviously doesn't go down well.
Recently we were on a camping trip, we were meeting up with another family and there were going to be a lot of boys there. The full mask went on and I'm afraid I had to say something as it would have been cruel not to given the environment we were in. She took it quite well and washed her face.
It's BS that this should have an impact - but she didn't seem to have any problem getting boy attention that night! They may have avoided her if she'd rocked up looking like a clown. I hate using the male validation card as a solution but it is unfortunately big currency in the world of an 18year old girl. Ever since, she's been sporting a more natural look which I pray will continue.
I think the upshot is, if you think she looks utterly ridiculous, then it's in her best interest that you gently say something. But if it's just a make up style that we don't appreciate (I'm not sure I appreciate any of them btw 🙄) then we should probably keep it to ourselves. Good luck 🙄

She's an adult op, and making her own choices about her own body/appearance. Whether you like them or not really isn't up for debate. I had the longest shiny blonde hair as a child and used to tell my mum I was going to dye it black when I was 16. Obviously she tried to talk me out of it, but guess what I did at 16... Dyed it black, had one half shaved, and I thought it was absolutely fantastic. I had it blue at one point, orange and pink streaks for a while, and went through a tattoo obsessive stage. Complete with maybelline dream mousse foundation 4 shades too dark, eyebrows plucked so thin they were barely visable, and more eyeliner than Ozzy Osborne in his prime. Looking back at photos now, I cringe at how bad I looked 😂 but at the time, I felt a million dollars, and it was, to me, a huge part of my identity and finding myself in the world. Now approaching 40, I have my simple blonde locks back, and am I presentable mum, working in a government job. I am not at all experimental with hairstyles and colours these days, and luckily my tattoos can all be well hidden day to day. A bit of bad makeup isn't going to define your daughter and who she is/becomes, please don't comment negatively as this will affect her self esteem massively. My mum must have hated what I did to my appearance at various points, but she'd always find something positive to say, like how it suits me, or it brings out my eye colour... She must have been saying it through gritted teeth I'm sure 🤣