Girls 16th bday ideas?? 💡 HELP!!

[Mumof4321]

My eldest is soon to be 16.
I’ve never done a party for any of my 4, as have never been able to afford it. I have my youngest (DS2) in August- then DD1- 1/10, DS1- 21/10, & DD2 5/11- then Xmas not long after. So moneys always been tight (im a single mum with no financial help from their dad 🙄- please don’t lecture on how he should pay etc- yes I know he should but u can’t draw blood from a stone!)
So their bdays are very close, and always felt unfair doing a party for one and not the others.
I didn’t think she would even want a party as really not overly social/ friend group is very small! But mentioned having one a few weeks ago. I honestly cannot afford a party with this much notice, as much as I’d love to do one for her. I also don’t want responsibility for a load of teens, and trying to sneak alcohol in etc- I don’t want a house of 15/16yr old girls either (have the younger 3 to think about and I’m also disabled so just seems ALOT!)
does anyone have any realistic suggestions please? I’d like to do something for her, I’m just not sure what 16yr old girls bdays consist of these days?? I thought maybe a spa kind of day for her and her closest friend?
please help 🫩😂 TIA!! X

We did a barbecue for our youngest when she turned 16. We told her it was family only but in fact we’d invited her godparents and some other family friends with their daughters who she’d known for years. We had everyone arriving at slightly different times and kept it all a secret. People kept turning up, then 20 minutes later someone else would come. She loved it and still talks about it now.

how soon is her birthday will it be when the weather is still likely to be good? As previous poster said a bbq would be a good idea and not too expensive, although I know the cost of food is ridiculous these days. Places like Asda do lovely birthday cakes to you can even get a personalised one with her photo on.
ive never gone ott on my kids birthday parties and the best ones have been just simple gatherings of friends at home.

Bbq but no cake. Make non alcoholic cocktails and do strawberries and cream. Ours did a mix for music and enjoyed chilling out as well. Set a finish time when parents collect.

Her birthday is 1st October, and is usually dry but cold.
Im not keen on her drinking. But would rather her drink supervised than me be so against it she goes out and puts herself in vulnerable positions. I’m not a stick in the mud (well, I don’t like to be) but It’s a tricky one to navigate. We know they will all drink at some point, it’s part of growing up, but I don’t think any of us really like the idea of it. they’re still our babies, after all. No matter how old they get.

I just really don’t want a house full of kids, even if I say no alcohol, you know one of them will sneak some in. I spoke to my auntie last night after posting this, and she said she wanted to do a 16th party for her twins in a hall (they’re now 18 so a couple years ago) but nowhere would let her unless there was a specific adult:child ratio. I can’t imagine asking kids to a party at this age and their parents staying.

im stuck! 🙈
maybe its just not going to happen and I manage to persuade her to something else. A friend mentioned our local bowling place. It has escape room and laser tag in the building too. But I can’t see her wanting to do that. She’s a very girly girl. Won’t get dirty etc.

I expect it will be I just give her more money than planned and take her to town and hope she’s happy with that. Maybe take her best mate and do lunch with them or something.

who knew this would be such an obstacle 😂😂

Have you actually asked her what she'd like to do with her selected friends for her birthday? I think thats the best thing to do.

For my dd1's 16th birthday she did an escape hunt with her friends and dinner altogether afterwards. It was a good balance imho.

Did you go along to or leave them all to it at this age?

Dh accompanied them on the hunt (from a distance), as it involved them walking around the busy local area streets and an 18+ adult was required to attend.

Then the rest of the family joined them for dinner afterwards.

@ByGreyWriter Make sure they cannot get hold of it! Your house, your rules. What would the other parents think if op supplied booze? Just don’t do it. If they might smuggle in booze, check rucksacks! No means no for 16 year olds and booze. Who wants these dc puking up? And they will!

@ByGreyWriter You would accept dc smoking? We must be on another planet. Absolutely no. Ditto to drinking alcohol. Clear it up? Never going to happen. Best plan is to avoid alcohol.