My dd has a boyfriend....help!

[brightwell]

My dd (13 almost 14)has told me she has a boyfriend...he's just turned 16. I'm trying to be cool about this, but inside I want to scream "he's too old for you, 16 year old boys want more than just friendships" I don't know what to do. This is scary territory.

Nothing prepares you does it? DD was 16 when she started seeing a 'lad' who turned out to be 29

13 and 14 yr olds want more than to be just friends too!

Maybe you can try to make sure they only go out to places where they are in public at first- and not always round his house etc etc. when no-one else is in.

Ultimately though you will have to let go and trust her- which is not easy. Maybe you can have a talk with her about what you think 16 yr old boys want and try to understand her feelings on it too?

lock her in her room and set a guard on the doors and windows

Feel reassured that she is normal and attractive to men .

Would you really prefer a nerdy daughter struggling to lose her virginity in her early 20s? No, thought not

don't panic. ds is 16 and his gf is 14(nearly 15) I am sure her mum felt the same.
But tbh they just seem to have a laugh together. lots of kissing but thats about it.
Why not do what the gf's mum did. she rings me to check I will be here if gf comes over. she wouldn't let gf go out with my ds untill she met him.
he hasn't minded any of this. he realises that the mum just cares(ok there are other things going on but I am sure you get me)
Maybe it will make you feel better.

It's knowing what boundaries to set. I've let her take him up to her room, only because there's no where else for them to go. House is small open plan layout, but the rules are....she's not to close her door and I will and do keep popping upstairs to do odd jobs.

What doesn't help is her dad, my ex is being a total pratt about it and is teasing (bullying)her horrendously.

Do you have a garden? now its summer they could sit out there and listen to music or chat. Saves you having to keep popping upstairs! BF will think you are a clean freak!

Still think locking her up until she is 21 is best idea

Would certainly like her to be at least 16 (18 or 19) and for it to be with some one who loves and respects her and is in a meaningful relationship with. Or is that wishful thinking!