Bullying at 15 WWYD?

[GradMama]

I posted a while back about my DS15 having been ditched by his friendship group at school. Things have now got worse and he is actively being bullied by one of the more dominant boys of the group, with others joining in. Nothing physical but still enough for DS not to want to go to school (he still does). If this had happened a few years ago I would have called the parents and discussed with them but now that DS is older I don't think that would be helpful and might make matters much worse for him. He still has one more year left in the school (he's in year 10) so needs to find a way to stop this before it gets worse. Is there anything I can do to help DS or make things easier for him? Anyone been in this situation?

Just to add, I have suggested that he talk to the boy directly, after all they used to be good friends not so long ago and have known each other for years, but according to DS this is not something that boys his age would do.

this sounds really tough, you must feel helpless. I know I would, why do kids act like this. Is he opening up to you?

DS thinks it's just control/power thing, as nothing actually happened, he says it happens a lot, especially amongst girls it seems, someone's always being ostracised for one reason or another. The main thing for DS is to make the active bullying stop before it gets worse, and I'm really worried now about the impact with next year being such an important year with GCSEs but any intervention by me or DH would not be helpful I think. Is there anything DS himself can do?

Don’t bother getting your son to talk to the boy directly, it won’t end well. Call the school and ask to speak to the Head of Year and get them to sort it out. Bully needs to be told it stops now! We had this exact scenario when my child was in Y10. The HoY handled it brilliantly and it was all stopped. Keep speaking to the school, it’s their responsibility to safeguard your child.