To diagnose or not ADHD?

[Mickey540]

My Ds Is 16 recently he’s been having some English tuition she also does work with special educational needs.
on her first day she asked me if I thought he had ADHD. I have thought maybe there is something but DH never agrees and always says the school have never said anything is wrong. He has struggled with his exams he can’t focus or concentrate v long. He gets in very low level trouble at school he’s v impulsive. He struggles with organisation. The tutor said she thinks he has mild adhd I am inclined to agree. But do I take him to be tested or not really not sure of any benefit to it but no clue really ? Any insight

@mamamamamamamamamamachameleon thanks so much for the response and insight that’s really helpful .

Sounds like me 😂. Although I'd never use the term mild unless talking about food.

Getting a diagnosis can only get him support and things like extra time in exams. I'd also recommend rest breaks in exams and a room without a ticking clock. It can also really help to have copies of slides during lessons or written instructions so they can follow at their own pace and go back over anything they've missed.

There are importantly benefits

1. Just the sense that he will have, of knowing himself better, of building his confidence and he can learn to understand the why and the wherefores of how his brain works- will help him throughout the rest of his life and stop him from blaming himself for difficulties in focusing for example.

2 . If he’s thinking of going into Higher Education he will be able to access lots of academic and other support which might prove invaluable once he’s there. It’s important to get that set up advance of the course starting and evidence of a formal diagnosis is essential for this.

Do it. My son has recently got his own diagnosis at 36. It would have been so much more use to him at 16. He has all of the same symptoms. He is also a successful software engineer on good money, so don’t despair.

One of the biggest impacts diagnosis and medication had on my life was the reduction in my horrendous anxiety. Diagnosed aged 52.

It was a battle for us to get a diagnosis but we finally have one. It’s helpful for us as later on down the line DD may want to try medication (which she does now). We got our diagnosis from CAMHS and it’s another 6 month wait post-diagnosis to be considered for medication now. She’s just turned 17 and may not have anything to try until nearer 18 when she’ll be referred to yet another adult list.

I would get started on the process asap if it’s something you’re thinking of before they age out of the services available.

I don't get why you can't! We are a very neurodiverse family it affects some of us greatly and some of us hardly at all. My non verbal autistic niece (can't dress, toilet, feed herself) has very different issues to my auADHD mainstream attending son who has his own struggles (friendships/drugs/poor results). My son with mild ADHD goes through life withf barely any issues apart from being messy and disorganised and late sometimes.

It's the "impact" that can be mild to severe - as you've actually highlighted in your response. The level of ADHD is irrelevant and is binary - you have it or you don't it's just how badly you are impacted - which will vary according to the person involved. DS is smart and insightful, but his version of ADHD has a particular impact on his ability to concentrate and on his short term memory and processesing. Academically as a result, he lost out on most of his primary schooling. He is catching up now with meds and effort, but this is different to a child with a different type of ADHD or who perhaps had their ADHD identified earlier or who perhaps is not as smart or insightful.

OP, just echoing everyone else. The diagnosis is so helpful for lots of reasons:

• Provides context and understanding for your DS, and reduces the potential mental health/confidence impact of being "different" or feeling "slow" or "dumb".
• Meds can be life changing
• With or without meds, a diagnosis allows other things to be put in place at school, college or even in the workplace. Extra time, a quiet room, the use of a laptop/key board, movement breaks etc are all good examples. Many schools will allow this routinely, but for the purposes of "big" exams, where the school does not have complete control, a diagnosis will take you one step closer to getting these accomodations.
• More practical support/guidance is available for you via professionals or your own research if you have the diagnosis and start understanding things better. From helping them to study to understanding the emotional disregulation.

@Mickey540

Definitely diagnose. It will be a good thing - will give him access to support for his focus/organisation issues. And - crucially - will give him accommodations for the exams.

Why have him disadvantaged when his education depends on timed tests, and ADHD makes it harder to get grates showing his actual ability.

I also wasn't sure about my DC - school said they were fine - achieving good grades, etc. But as school work became harder, it also put more pressure on them. Now with diagnosis - they get breaks that help refocus in exams.

Schools don't always pick up and recommend assessment. Teachers don’t necessarily have the skills, or lack initiative to do that.

If you can afford it - look for a private specialist, and even private are hard to find as demand is huge. NHS will take ages and you might not get support by A-levels.

ADHD is often diagnosed with a severity. It’s not the same as autism in that regard.

I disagree with this statement. I have two boys with adhd and autism. Boy one has severe adhd, it’s pretty much his biggest disabler and responds poorly to medication. Boy two has much fewer issues with adhd, is far less impulsive or hyperactive. It responds well to medication.

Boy three has inattentive adhd which affects his focus and organisation.

Do get him tested just to be sure! I had same niggling doubts and left it (Covid and a move etc) and we were getting along but it’s come back hard at Uni and we’re now getting it confirmed. A bit late for sure!

Exactly this. Of course some presentations are milder than others.

But my kids were diagnosed with different levels of ADHD. Can't quite remember the rating system used.

Good idea to get diagnosis, my DD was diagnosed as an adult and the medication has made her life easier. She would also get extra help at college and university if she has ADHD.

Strange. I asked our psychiatrist about this and he was very very firm that there is no "level" and the impact is the only thing.

I wonder if it has changed in terms of diagnostic process?

Obviously, of the 18 symptoms some might have the bare minimum while others will have all, but I wouldn't think that intrinsically means you have it "more badly" than someone who has fewer but the few they have are very impactful.

Interesting. I'm guessing there is different processes and/or there's been a change in ADHD diagnosis.

Maybe! I'll try and dig out the forms.

@Shenmen i agree with you thank you