Breakfast with teens

[Flyhigher]

Do your teens insist on breakfast alone?

Ummm. —- that doesn’t work with her.
she gets anxious/ angry.

Mine is similar, she is ND, but also has an attitude problem and can be very rude, and pulling her up on it can lead to explosive anger but I still have to.

I'd probably say "OK, I will be out of your way when I've got my coffee, give me 2 mins". So not very confrontational but also making clear it's give and take and I have a right to be there. Or I might say "Ok we both need to cook, 10 minutes each do you want to go first or second?"

If she's very rude/abusive/barks orders at me there are consequences (eg no favours like lifts, Internet may go off until she makes up for it with a chore, or similar) but I do let lower-level grumpiness go.

Not normal to be ordered out of the kitchen but quite normal for some people to not enjoy the company of others at the breakfast table if they are not morning people - I hate it. Even worse are hotel breakfasts esp when staying for work - I don’t like talking to my family as soon as I get up I certainly dont want to chat with John from accounts over his bacon and eggs lol

That is not a response you have to accept either, and it will get her nowhere in life.

She needs more than the usual help in understanding the behaviour you expect from her, but you have to find a way to communicate that there are expectations that must be met, and that you are holding her to a certain standard so that she will be able to navigate her way through life.