False tan

[Blackbirdsong]

Hey, my daughter is 12, very pale and quite obsessed with having a tan. She recognises the importance of wearing SpF, but also wants to look like a lot of her more olive skinned, naturally tanned friends. I'm conflicted by the idea of letting her use a false tan - she's only 12 and I don't like the thought of her constantly modifying herself to fit in with these repeatedly perpetuated standards of beauty, but also, I tend to think, it's just a bit of false tan... any thoughts?

How about tinted moisturiser? I use Nivea or Dove depending on what’s on offer. I find them more subtle than fake tan, easier to apply and you can’t over do it in one application!

I’ve just bought Gatineau fake tan. It’s gradual and quite subtle. I would have no problem with a teenage daughter using a bit on her arms and legs during summer.

I'd let her try it. It's such a faff to apply properly and maintain, she'll be put off the whole idea within a month. Or tinted body lotion as suggested above.

Thanks for your messages. I can tie myself up in knots overthinking these things sometimes. Your level headed responses are appreciated 👏

I’ve got a 14-year-old and the whole image thing starts so young now. I feel the same conflict, you want to protect her self-esteem, but also don’t want to make a big deal out of something that might just be a phase.
If she’s being safe with SPF and it’s just a bit of fake tan, I’d probably allow it in moderation (tinted moisturiser is a good idea) but use it as a chance to talk about where these beauty pressures come from maybe.
With my daughter, she found this app called Luna (weareluna.app) that’s really good for that age group, because it covers body image, confidence, that kind of thing in a relatable way but still age-appropriated/I really trust. Might be a good quiet support in the background.

I think its a right of passage to have a bad fake tan, I think id want my DD to get it over with at 12 than when shes 18 and going out like I did!
Maybe try getting the one day stuff for now that washes off so she gets an idea and isn't stuck for a few days patchy and/or orange

You are so right. We got the garnier one and she threw herself into it and ended up exceedingly streaky! Doesn't seem to be quite so bothered to use it now she has actually got it at her disposal. Funny that!