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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

17 year old spilled water on Host family Laptop

500 replies

Mrsg26 · 01/04/2025 23:46

Wonder if someone can offer advice on what to do in this situation. My daughter is 17 and is auditioning for drama schools at present. As she is under 18 and visiting schools in London ( we live in Scotland) She has had to stay with a host family on her visits. Last night the Host offered my daughter some water but placed the glass on the kitchen table next to her laptop. My daughter picked up the glass but it slipped and some water went on the host’s laptop. The lady told my daughter last night not to worry and she dried it, she said she had a new laptop which was there in the kitchen however today The lady called me whilst my daughter was in her audition and told me it will cost £200 to repair the laptop and the expectation is for me to pay for it to be repaired.

Whilst i totally am sympathetic and sorry for what happened, as is my daughter, she didn't do it intentionally or with any malice and it was a complete accident. Part of me thinks why would she place a glass of water next to expensive equipment, as spillages often happen in kitchens. As an experienced host with lots of children in her home regularly she should be aware of these hazards. This is her business and therefore she should insure against these things.

Whilst I am not against contributing towards the repairs, I just feel that I shouldn’t have to pay for it all as they were both negligent. Any advice from other parents of teens? Thanks

OP posts:
Bogginsthe3rd · 02/04/2025 06:34

Mrsg26 · 02/04/2025 01:03

The host is not someone employed by the universities and is not affiliated with the colleges in any way. We used her once last year and 2 short stays this year. I have never met her.

I will do what someone further up said & will pay half, but not all. I simply don't have that amount of spare cash anyway, & my daughter cannot afford to pay her either

Show quote history

Lol. You need to pay in full. It's really the only right thing to do. Why should you pay half? Your daughter spilt water on their laptop and that's what the repairs cost.

susiedaisy1912 · 02/04/2025 06:36

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 00:05

I wouldn't be paying.
Accidents happen sometimes.
Your dc wasn't messing about or doing anything irresponsible.
It's frustrating for the host, but part of her business is hosting people in her house. If there is anything that she can't afford to have damaged, she should put it away.

Agree with this.

Spirallingdownwards · 02/04/2025 06:39

Be thankful it just needs such a cheap repair. My son's girlfriend spilled water in a similar way over his laptop at uni and it was damaged beyond repair and needed replacing. Fortunately he had gadget insurance cover but I think the excess was about £200 anyway.

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 02/04/2025 06:41

Mrsg26 · 01/04/2025 23:59

She isn't with her any more. She left this morning & wont be returning.

The first time my daughter stayed here it was arranged through a 3rd party agency, the host said we can cut out the agency so the last 2 times she has stayed she has just arranged directly with the lady and transferred her the money for the stay. However There has been no contract signed to say damages need to be paid for by child or parent. Whilst morally I feel we need to contribute i don’t think
she should pursue us for the full repair bill. Just wanted other opinions before I respond to her.

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Well, you've alreasy saved on agency fees by by-passing them, which is very underhand behaviour, btw. If you were running a business and your clients started doing stuff amongst temselves causing you loss of earnings, how would you feel?
So, your savings can pay for repairs.
The host alsocshould be reported, because this avoidance of the agency brings other issues, safeguarding concerns being the most worryingg. If there is no agency to contact, who would a parent report an abusive host to. How will their behaviour/living arrangements be assessed? How will this income be declared?
The host is dishonest, you've colluded with this, now host is showing their true colours, and youu are unlikely to have any recourse

Peaceandquietandacuppa · 02/04/2025 06:43

Question is - do you want her to stay there again or not. If yes, pay. If no, don’t.

TheGaaTheSkaAndTheRa · 02/04/2025 06:45

I would pay and be pissed off at my daughter. She was given water which was a NICE THING but dropped it. She's 17. She should pay some too.

Life lesson that should not be reframed.

TheAmusedQuail · 02/04/2025 06:45

MiniCoopers · 02/04/2025 06:15

How much water spillage are we talking? Most laptops can sustain a bit of liquid, I know mine has without it being an issue.

Not always. I wiped a laptop out with a splash once. I was gutted.

Missey85 · 02/04/2025 06:45

jellyfishperiwinkle · 02/04/2025 04:46

Her actions were to have an unfortunate accident, likely caused by the host, who is quite equally possibly just grubbing up money for a brand new laptop she already has.

If the daughter had done something recklessly or deliberately that would be a different matter. There's taking responsibility for your children's actions and there is allowing someone to behave unconscionably towards them then take the piss out of you.

Being a doormat is not an example I would want to set for my daughter, nor is blaming them for someone else's reckless behaviour.

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I et you wouldn't be saying that if it was your laptop that got ruined she's not a toddler she's old enough to be responsible for her mistakes but she apparently has mummy to fight her battles

Flamingoknees · 02/04/2025 06:50

Mrsg26 · 02/04/2025 00:08

She placed a glass of water next to her computer on a kitchen table. Spillages happen regularly in kitchens and its easy cleaned up. But if expensive equipment is there then that should have been considered. If the host had spilled water on my daughter’s ipad, I wouldnt expect her to pay as my daughter would know not to have expensive equipment where food and drink are consumed. That is where I feel the Host also has to take some responsibility

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That's easy to say, when the shoe is firmly on the other foot. I would pay.

nomas · 02/04/2025 06:50

How much water did your dd spill? A whole glass spilt onto the keyboard would cause damage but often a little water is tolerated, especially if they keyboard is immediately turned upside down to let the water fall out.

Given this woman has cut out the agency to save costs, I’d also ask for evidence of damage and a quote for repair on letter headed paper.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 02/04/2025 06:51

You could just go around and around with different could've and should've scenarios.
You don't want to pay and you don't feel you should pay.
If you want to preserve the relationship you'll pay and never think about it again.

Flamingoknees · 02/04/2025 06:51

nomas · 02/04/2025 06:50

How much water did your dd spill? A whole glass spilt onto the keyboard would cause damage but often a little water is tolerated, especially if they keyboard is immediately turned upside down to let the water fall out.

Given this woman has cut out the agency to save costs, I’d also ask for evidence of damage and a quote for repair on letter headed paper.

Edited

Yes, I agree, that's fair

Overhaul54 · 02/04/2025 06:51

NorthernSpirit · 02/04/2025 00:03

I can’t believe you are trying to wriggle out of paying.

Your daughter damaged something. You should pay. Don’t they to get out of it & make excuses.

If you were the host & the child damaged your belongings - would you expect the family of the child to pay? I bet you would. Treat people like you would like yo be treated yourself.

A business is a different issue.
If I accidentally knocked water on the laptop used for payment in the hairdresser’s/dentist/deli I wouldn’t expect to pay.

jellyfishperiwinkle · 02/04/2025 06:52

Missey85 · 02/04/2025 06:45

I et you wouldn't be saying that if it was your laptop that got ruined she's not a toddler she's old enough to be responsible for her mistakes but she apparently has mummy to fight her battles

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If I happened to me in those circumstances I would be kicking myself for giving someone a wet glass of water near my laptop and would brush it off as my own silly fault.

nomas · 02/04/2025 06:53

Missey85 · 02/04/2025 06:45

I et you wouldn't be saying that if it was your laptop that got ruined she's not a toddler she's old enough to be responsible for her mistakes but she apparently has mummy to fight her battles

Show quote history

Or maybe the host should have continued to use the agency, who would have helped in this situation. The host has tried to save money and it’s backfired.

Who puts a laptop and a glassful of water next to a random teen anyway? Why not remove the laptop? Laptops should not be at the table when food/drink is being served.

Flissty · 02/04/2025 06:54

If this family is hosting for money then they should have insurance for breakages like this - I would ask that first. If you have booked them through an agency I would contact that agency for advice as well.
If you do decide to pay any amount, you should request to see the invoice for the repair to make sure this is genuine and not a chancer thinking it would be nice to make some extra cash out of you.

Hoggyhoghog · 02/04/2025 06:55

She should have house insurance to cover these things.

I would pay and get my DC to work it off to pay me back.

Truetoself · 02/04/2025 06:56

You can ask the host if she is insured for this damage? Or to send you a receipt for the repair.

Heidi2018 · 02/04/2025 06:58

Definitely ask to pay the repairs directly or pay on receipt but you should pay.

I think the new laptop is irrelevant. I still have my old laptop as a back up. She might need to transfer files over, etc.

MyDeftDuck · 02/04/2025 06:59

Check your own insurance policy for third party cover - they might pay out if you put a claim in.

Bumpitybumper · 02/04/2025 07:02

jellyfishperiwinkle · 02/04/2025 04:46

Her actions were to have an unfortunate accident, likely caused by the host, who is quite equally possibly just grubbing up money for a brand new laptop she already has.

If the daughter had done something recklessly or deliberately that would be a different matter. There's taking responsibility for your children's actions and there is allowing someone to behave unconscionably towards them then take the piss out of you.

Being a doormat is not an example I would want to set for my daughter, nor is blaming them for someone else's reckless behaviour.

Show quote history

This is the most insane post I've ever read on MN.

OP's DD is 17 and almost an adult. She probably requested a glass of water and was given one. She then accidentally spilt the water which was completely her fault. It would have been really ridiculous for the host to demand that OP's DD drank her water away from the laptop in case of spillages. This is how you would treat a small child, not someone that is very close to the cusp of adulthood. The host has in no way caused the accident and to pretend she has done is just an obvious attempt to save the money OP rightfully owes.

Also all this talk about being a doormat... If OP doesn't pay then she is role modelling some morally dubious behaviour. Relying on a technicality (that the host had given her DD the glass of water) to absolve her DD of blame. Her DD should be encouraged to risk assess situations better and act as an adult. If she isn't comfortable drinking water near a laptop then just don't do it! She could have moved the water away from the device or waited to drink the water until she had finished her work on the laptop. It's a great opportunity to teach the DD that accidents can have consequences and we are all individually responsible for mitigating risks as best we can. Something doesn't have to be malicious to be wrong or cause damage.

livealittlex · 02/04/2025 07:03

Why is no one talking about the fact that you can’t repair something like a laptop or phone that’s been water damaged?

jellyfishperiwinkle · 02/04/2025 07:03

Hoggyhoghog · 02/04/2025 06:55

She should have house insurance to cover these things.

I would pay and get my DC to work it off to pay me back.

Perhaps I should have taken it out of my three year old's pocket money when she was sat on my lap watching CBeebies and threw up on my laptop? 🤔

I recently somehow ended up with every Office app corrupted on my brand new Surface Pro - apparently due to my shutting it down mid update when I had to leave to get a train. It had to be taken back and rebuilt. My workplace is not making me work extra hours to pay for the repair, oddly enough, because shit happens with computers. 🙄

HopingForTheBest25 · 02/04/2025 07:03

I'd ask to see the report from the repair shop. To me this is a total fluke accident and it's not your DD's fault that the host placed a glass of water next to a laptop - I'd say different if your dd was actually using the laptop and had chosen to have a drink right next to it. This is largely on the host imo. But I'd not be taking her word for a £200 bill and not ask for any evidence of water damage. If there is evidence then I'd split the bill.

Gallowayan · 02/04/2025 07:04

beetr00 · 01/04/2025 23:57

@Mrsg26 does the host not have house insurance?

There is usually an excess of at least £200