silent terror, do we share a daughter,!! i have been to hell and back with dd1, she passed all her GCSE's with flying colours and was a 'model pupil' at high school,however, shes recently quit college , out of the blue without even discussing it with me, also was studying english a levels, and sociology, she decided she wanted to work, but she has now after 3 weeks has quit that job cos she said it was shit and shes going to get something better, she's gone from being a beautiful polite young lady to a real horrible spiteful and selfish bitch, she is rude, makes such a mess and never tidies or helps out at home, she literally gets up, (around midday) gets ready and goes out to meet her mates, she comes home late and just goes to bed and so the cycle goes on, she is so unapproachable lately, all we seem to do is argue, i even slapped her last week after she started swearing at me when i shouted at her for not coming home or calling me to tell me that she was staying at her mates, she just switched off her phone, i m 6mths preg and ended up having a sleepless night worrying about her, unfortunatlely it got out of hand and i ended up telling her to go and stay with her mates as they seem to be all she cares about, she did !! i called her the next day (mon)to say sorry and tell her to come home, she did that night and i pampered her out of guilt,(big mistake), the next day(tues) was my birthday and she said she would come out with me for the day, we got as far as the cormer shop when she asked me to buy her cigarettes and i refused asi'm trying to show her she needs to work, again she got rude and swore at me, i walked away from her and got on the bus without her, she sent me an awful txt tellin me i'm a spiteful bitch, shes never coming home and she hoped me and my f#cking baby die !i was broken hearted that she could even think something like that i spent the rest of my b'day crying, i never called her back i did call her friends to make sure she was safe and ok, she stayed at her mates, she called me saturday and said she was so sorry for wot she had said and wanted to come home, we sat and talked sat night, and i told her that i love her and don't want her to not be at home, but i will not allow her to waste her life, either she goes back to college or gets a job, i made it clear i will not allow her to sign on to claim dole money, i also told her she must start tidying up after herself and not be so rude to us all at home, she said being away has taught her how lucky she was at home, and said she accepted that there has to be rules no matter how grown she thinks she is, for the first day or so she was great, now she has gone right back to how she was, still no job, or no real effort to find one, i have been feeling unwell for a couple of days and had a stomach bug, woke up this morning too ill to go to work, she woke up at 12, and i told her she had left a mess in the kitchen last night and she had to clean it, she told me to shut up and stop moaning and stormed back up to her room, i ended up having to go to labour ward this afternoon as my head was throbbing and i was dehydrated from this bug and tummy hurting from vomiting, she was supposed to have a hosp appt at 4pm as she has arthritus and osteoporosis, i asked to be discharged so i could go and meet her at the clinic, and was told she had got there at 3.30 and left with her mates after 10 mins saying she couldnt wait as she had to go to work, i told the nurse she was lying as she hasnt got a job, they are worried as she is not attending her appointments, i called her and confronted her as to why she diddnt wait and she shouted at me and told me to stay out of her private business, it also hurts me that she was at the same hosp and diddnt even come and see if me and baby were ok,she basically left to go and hang out with her mates, i tried to show her that if they were her mates they would have encouraged her to stay for her appt, as they know how important it is, and she said she would rather be with her mates than me ! i don't know wot else to do, i feel like she is just taking the piss, at the moment i feel torn between wanting her to be at home sorting herself out and hating her being here as she is so horrible and selfish, and guilty for even thinking it, my younger one is usually the cheeky one, but she has really turned herself around since i got pregnant, helps at home, got a saturday job, and behaves at school, always asking about baby, wanting to feel kicks etc, dd1 has made it clear she is not in the slightest bit interested, my DH is also getting quite down about all this, more so cos he says this is unfair on me unnecesary stress ect, i see a niave silly young girl when i look at her, she sees a herself as a big woman who knows it all, she has just sent me a text 10.19pm, to tell me she's staying at her mates tonight, but no apology.i just dont know what to do anymore and i feel like i have really failed..