Would you let your son watch Adolescence in this situation

[WorryWart2025]

We haven’t watched it yet. We are planning to soon. My question is whether we should watch it with our eldest child, who is 17 years old and has started to parrot some troubling worldviews that I would describe as incel-inspired. We are already taking action to tackle this. For wider context, he is intelligent and reflective, but suggestible. In this situation, do you think exposure to this programme is likely to harm or help?

At 17 surely he has access to Netflix that he could just watch it if he wanted to without your permission?! He’s nearly an adult. And any conversation you can have about male on female violence can only be a good thing.

Obviously the programme is critical of the whole movement as I'm sure you know given what you know about the programme. Doubt it was cause serious harm unless he sees this murdering 13 year old boy as some kind of inspiration? In which case, bigger problems etc.

On the one hand it talks in extremes (13 year old murders girl) but it's also not preachy.

It might neither help nor harm. Just give it a go? Might prompt some conversations you can have at home.

There’s a thread with a similar discussion which might be relevant

www.mumsnet.com/talk/teenagers/5296749-adolescence-netflix

You can’t control what a 17 watches, either stopping him or making him.
what are you worried might happen if he watches it?

Of course I couldn’t/wouldn’t stop him from watching it, but he is more interested in movies and wouldn’t naturally watch something like this. My question is whether we should suggest & encourage it. My concern is whether there is any content that would ‘speak to’ this streak we’ve recently detected in him where he seems inclined to take a dim view of women. I’m basically asking for content insights from the perspective of other parents of teenagers. Thanks for the advice and link a couple of you have shared.

His views themselves aren’t exactly ‘incel’, however I think he has been exposed to views/content of this nature that he has internalised. Definitely no worries about violence, we are just trying to nip this attitude in the bud before it grows into something more venomous. I think if more of these adult male incels had parents who detected and acted quickly when they were young, we’d have a better world today. In other words, it’s a sensitive time in his development and I’m just trying to figure out if this is an opportunity or a threat.

It's not a recruitment film op

What do you know about his views, specifically? It’s unlikely he would respect the (younger) boy specifically, but he might feel like some of the incel-y takes in it resonate with him, or are not as unreasonable / wrong as they are to a rational adult. Incels often refer to the mass murderer Elliot Rodger as “the supreme gentleman”, which is a(n incredibly disgusting) term of approbation. They don’t have normal feelings towards women who are victimised by men. I’m not saying your son’s views would be this extreme, of course, but it’s something to keep in mind. However, it might be better to watch it and discuss it than not to know what he’s thinking.