My DS is 18. Context is that he expects to be accorded adult rights in some areas whilst not lifting a finger to help in the house at all. He's still in education, at college, and has difficulties with his mental health plus suspected autism. He doesn't go out often, so when he does, I'm pleased to see him socialising and getting out of his room. He keeps irregular routines and barely attends college as a result. At home, there is me, DH and our 3yo.
He's told me he'll be heading out with friends today in a different city. We live in a small town, but public transport post 11pm. He hasn't explained how he'll be getting home and I'm leaving him to it in that regard. He doesn't feel he should have to confirm when he will be home or if he will be staying at a friend's. I feel that he needs to be home by 12am or stay over with his friend if he wants to be out later. The reason for this is that he will inevitably wake me up returning home, as he will go to use the bathroom and his bedroom is right next to mine. I'm so concerned about him coming home hammered as this is his first "big" night out. I don't want the rest of us woken in the early hours and certainly not by him vomiting over the bathroom, for example. It might be the weekend tomorrow but our 3yo will be up as always at 7am.
Is a "curfew" reasonable? I'm not saying that he has to curtail his night out, just that he needs to stay at his friend's (who's apparently already said he can do this) if he wants to come home later than 12am or get rolling drunk. Is this reasonable given the additional context?