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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Urgent help pls

9 replies

Oyem11111111 · 12/02/2025 03:13

My Dd 13 years have since last year have a friendship issue in school. One of her friends decided to tell on her to the other friends and was able to pull all other friends away from my Dd who now have no friend at all.
She is alone in school and says she spends all her breaks alone in the toilet crying everyday
She now hates school.
She want to change school.
Going through her search history by school it was realized she is searching how to commit suicide.
"How to kill yourself "
School detected that because she made some comments on her journal that "" I can't cope with this anymore " which was very concerning to everyone.

I contacted school earlier when I realized that all her friends have left her last year but nothing serious was done by school.
I am really devastated and feel very sorry for her.

She used to have so many friends.
Very lovely & happy girl in primary school, her teachers all love her , all the comments on her report sheets have been very encouraging but everything changed now she is in secondary school.
I don't know what to do now.
I tried to change her school but no vacancy anywhere.
Pls help

OP posts:
starlight94 · 12/02/2025 03:21

Could she do an online school and go on the waitlist for the other schools?

MumonabikeE5 · 12/02/2025 03:32

Withdraw her from school and homeschool until a place comes up.

what hobbies or interests does she have? Use these as a way to develop confidence, self esteem and possibly new social opportunities.
if she doesn’t already have hobbies use this time to intentionally explore some.

howdoyoudooooo · 12/02/2025 03:39

Are you in the UK? Ask the school for a meeting with the Designated Safeguarding Lead. Ask what pastoral or wellbeing support they can put in place. Ask them to help with a safety plan to safeguard your dd. Ask them what referrals they can make to get support. If she’s in crisis, go to A&E.

Doggydinners · 12/02/2025 07:23

When my daughter had friendship issues school were great and put these things in place- perhaps you could ask for similar?
*seating plans switched around to sit her next to likely friends
*a safe place to go to at lunchtime/breaks
*regular ‘check ins’ with a trusted teacher
these things did make all the difference,
hope things improve quickly

DustyLee123 · 12/02/2025 07:25

Often pastoral or SEN team have places the kids can go at breaks, so they aren’t alone.
Have you contacted the GP or school nurse over her MH, ask about a referral to CAMHS.

verycloakanddaggers · 12/02/2025 07:26

Speak to school about her moving or home educating.

You must take the suicidal thoughts seriously, she's in distress. Go to the GP today, and ask for urgent school meetings today.

Keep her home today.

fridaynight1 · 12/02/2025 07:30

Pull her out of this school and don’t send her back. See your GP today. And then take it from there - your GP will help.

Oyem11111111 · 16/02/2025 04:04

Thanks everyone for your help & suggestions,
I followed up with all that has been suggested & waiting to see results. Thanks

OP posts:
Raisinsandweetabix · 16/02/2025 19:38

Going through almost identical situation here with our 13 year old DD. Best friend from primary hooked up with another girl and have cut DD out. Very sad, angry and lost all motivation to go to school. It's making life difficult for us all. So sad to see her with no plans this half term. I think if it doesn't resolve after half term we will start looking into loving schools. Good luck. Year 8 is awful for many

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