my sweet, nice DD has turned into a TEENAGER!!!!

[NaughtyNigella]

just turned 12. is still quite sweet and nice but has got all emotional - bursts into tears at the drop of a hat, has got sarky and pernickity.

DD2 bringing up the rear at 10 - has always been stroppy.

how on earth am i going to manage the next 8 years without going mental?

It will pass - mine became lovely again at 15 - until then my wine intake probably went up rather a lot!
"Get Out of My Life" is a great book - by T Wolfe

It might take longer than 15. My 18 year old can still be like this.

oh dear.
how will i cope when they're both being emotional and hormonal?

Gin and chocolate. Plenty of it.

Oh I so know what you mean. Have just had a screaming match with my nearly 12 year old and totally lost it. Argumentative, rude cheeky, challenging. Can't believe she is like this at the moment! SHe never used to be.

She told me that she hates feeling like this and can't help it. Bloody hormones!!!

DD2 is nearly 10 so will have all this for years to come. (And I am very hormonally challenged too and that doesn't help!)

DS1 is 13 and DS 2 is 12.

DS2 is now going through what DS1 went through this time last year - tantrums, stroppiness, storming out of the room, yelling and screaming, not wanting to see my point of view, "nobody understands me", etc....

I say never mind, it will pass. DS1 says DS2 is mardy, until I remind DS1 that he was exactly the same a year ago! Now DS1 is far calmer, easier to talk to and reason with, and infact can be extremely adult at times. But of course he can still be a stroppy little so and so when things don't go his way!

From one well in it in ways I would never wish on anyone the idea that it will pass is little comfort. How do you handle the moment?
Yes, be prepared, read books, the one already mentioned or Uncommon Sense for Parents with Teenagers by Michael Riera and try not to do what I have persistently forgotten to do which is get involved in their pain, frustrations, anger etc. So much easier said and done as I well know!
And of course there's always mumsnet
It's a tough time for all of us and I have been wondering lately why sane, intelligent adults make decisions to bring children into our lives with the full knowledge that they will be teenagers one day and still do it!

Of course that should read NOT get involved...

DD is 15 at the end of the month, so I got all excited when I saw LittleWonder's message.

mumeeee - you went a spoilt it!

I've got 4 teenage daughters and a teenage son. It's a tough time, but it usually only lasts a couple of years. Just love her and make sure she knows it. All the crap that happens in the middle doesn't mean a thing really - teenagers' brains are a little deranged because of the hormones (try to think how tearful etc you get as a pregnant woman. You know you're a bit strange, but there's not a damn thing you can do about it until you've stopped being pregnant, is there?) I remember getting very depressed when I was a teenager, because James Dean was dead. WTF?? But it was very real depression, and it lasted about 6 months.

Their behaviour usually is not meant as a personal affront, so try to let it wash over you. When times are really difficult, remember you can always put their presents, cards and belongings on the front doorstep on their 18th birthday!! I used to enjoy this thought A LOT.

Sorry ajandmum. All children are difernt so yours might be fine at 15. DD2 18 didn't really start getting stroppy until she was 14. She can still be a nice young lady when she is not being stroppy and she soetimes makes us al laugh with her different accents. DD1 21 was a lot less stroppy then DD2, she only went threw a brief phase of doing this and still liked to talk to me. She was fine most of the time by the time she was 16.
DD316 can be stroppy but at other times is a very chtty girl and ocassionally likes to come shopping with me.

I suppose that's it - they're all different! Having one of each I tend to be very sexist about it, whereas it's just their different characters.

Love 'em to bits though!