Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

DS15 and personal hygiene - just why?

22 replies

Hazeby · 09/01/2025 16:07

I’ve just found DSs toothbrush in his unpacked bag from our NY trip. Meaning he’s not cleaned his teeth for a week.

His skin is terrible as he doesn’t wash his face. He gets in the shower after a lot of nagging and I suspect he just gets wet and gets out again. There are less pants in his laundry basket than there are days of the week. His hair is greasy. He is honestly a bit gross to look at.

I’ve been through phases of nagging. I’ve been through phases of standing over him to make him. I’ve been through phases of ignoring it, hoping peer pressure and girls might have an effect. Nothing works.

What should I be doing?

OP posts:
SoulMole · 09/01/2025 16:08

Sorry. Just here for the replies because I thought you were talking about my son. 😆

Justmuddlingalong · 09/01/2025 16:09

Ignore it. He'll take no notice of your suggestions His peers will let him know soon enough.

Original poster
Hazeby · 09/01/2025 16:16

Justmuddlingalong · 09/01/2025 16:09

Ignore it. He'll take no notice of your suggestions His peers will let him know soon enough.

Even the teeth?

OP posts:
ByQuaintAzureWasp · 09/01/2025 16:18

Get his dad to have a chat. Teeth is going to be a big problem when somebody has to pay for his dentistry.

PJsAndRainyDays · 09/01/2025 16:19

Sorry no don't ignore it. It's horrible.
I would tell him it's not only is it unhygienic it's also quite selfish and unpleasant for other people.
I mean surely he must smell?! Does he have a lot of friends?
I think it should just be part of the daily routine and non negotiable like going to school.

Justmuddlingalong · 09/01/2025 16:20

Yip. Unless you physically pin him down, it's his choice.
He could lie and say he's done it, when you both know he hasn't.
I found this phase was a precursor to the overpowering stench of lynx body spray.
It's a grim time and I send my sympathies.

MyStylish40s · 09/01/2025 16:21

How is he otherwise? I don’t mean to alarm you, but in my experience, it’s sometimes an indicator of poor mental health

MysteriousUsername · 09/01/2025 16:24

I'd remind him about his teeth and remind at least twice a week for a shower - make it same night and get into a routine. That's what I did with my lot. They have all grown out of the minging stinky stage about 16 - I think sixth form makes them grow up a bit.

A couple of them (i have 5 boys!) did the old walk under the shower and walk out again. They were told to get back in a wash properly or I'd go in and do it for them. That was enough to get them running to the bathroom 😂

Also my lot aren't sporty so weren't coming home covered in mud, sweat etc, which is why twice a week was my minimum.

MessyNeate · 09/01/2025 16:27

Pretty normal for teenage boys! Daily battle in this house. Though DS 14 is better but plays sports and has a girlfriend. DS 17 is a nightmare!

Shiningout · 09/01/2025 16:33

I remember going through a soap dodging stage as a teenager but always brushed my teeth. His breath must be absolutely honking if he hasn't brushed for a week. I would be saying he needs to brush his teeth daily or consequences tbh, that is grim and not normal even for a grubby teen.

itsparklesitshines · 09/01/2025 16:39

Tell him bad breath is very off-putting to girls (or partners!)

My DH's daily mantra to our teen boy (now at Uni) was to have a morning 'shower, shave and a sh*t' - teeth also included in that!

It seems to have stuck as he's now got it in his routine. Can't comment on his bowel habits 😆, but it amused me at the time

pinse · 09/01/2025 16:40

Ds14 has a smelly class mate so he makes sure he showers every morning and uses deodorant. He wasn't very good at brushing his teeth but then he got a cavity and after it was fixed he has been good brushing his teeth. Dd12 wasn't using deodorant when she was ten years old her friend told her that she smells bo. After that she has taken care of her personal hygiene.

LoafofSellotape · 09/01/2025 16:44

I certainly didn't ignore it when ds was a bit of a soap dodger at that age , that's a slippery slope imo.

Stern words, remind him , tell him basics come first or he's not getting the WiFi code/ lift to his mates/ whatever is dear to him.

Shower every day, deodorant and teeth cleaned x2 a day minimum.

TheMasterplan23 · 09/01/2025 16:45

My DS14 is a pain for teeth brushing….

he’ll spend ages in the shower and get through ridiculous amounts of Lynx but seems to forget about his teeth.

So, the Wifi is turned off morning and night till he’s brushed them. Seems to have done the trick. God forbid he misses more than 2 minutes on Fifa (or discussing fifa online with his mates)

MumblesParty · 09/01/2025 17:00

TheMasterplan23 · 09/01/2025 16:45

My DS14 is a pain for teeth brushing….

he’ll spend ages in the shower and get through ridiculous amounts of Lynx but seems to forget about his teeth.

So, the Wifi is turned off morning and night till he’s brushed them. Seems to have done the trick. God forbid he misses more than 2 minutes on Fifa (or discussing fifa online with his mates)

I would do something similar. SEN or illness aside, basic hygiene is compulsory in my opinion. I wouldn’t be pussy-footing around hoping he’d grow out of it. He may have no teeth left by then. Not washing or cleaning your teeth is disgusting and I would use whatever power I had (which is pretty much only wifi for teenagers) to sort this out.

notanaskhole · 09/01/2025 17:02

Shiningout · 09/01/2025 16:33

I remember going through a soap dodging stage as a teenager but always brushed my teeth. His breath must be absolutely honking if he hasn't brushed for a week. I would be saying he needs to brush his teeth daily or consequences tbh, that is grim and not normal even for a grubby teen.

Agree. It’s not normal.🤮 And I’d tell him so. He must absolutely stink!

notanaskhole · 09/01/2025 17:06

MessyNeate · 09/01/2025 16:27

Pretty normal for teenage boys! Daily battle in this house. Though DS 14 is better but plays sports and has a girlfriend. DS 17 is a nightmare!

It’s not normal to not brush your teeth for a WEEK even for the grubbiest teenage boy.

LaurieFairyCake · 09/01/2025 17:12

He'll be fine once someone wants to kiss him or play with his cock Grin

(But yes get his dad to have a word)

LoafofSellotape · 09/01/2025 17:25

LaurieFairyCake · 09/01/2025 17:12

He'll be fine once someone wants to kiss him or play with his cock Grin

(But yes get his dad to have a word)

I doubt anyone will want to at this rate!

notanaskhole · 09/01/2025 17:40

LaurieFairyCake · 09/01/2025 17:12

He'll be fine once someone wants to kiss him or play with his cock Grin

(But yes get his dad to have a word)

I doubt this will happen. His teeth will be rotten and black by then anyway.

whathaveiforgotten · 09/01/2025 17:46

Does his breath not stink OP?!

MissyB1 · 09/01/2025 18:04

We went through this stage when ds was 14 going in 15, now he’s 16 and awe can’t get him out of the bathroom! He’s showering twice a day and stinking the house out with Lynx!

Mind you he always did his teeth.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread