My son had an 18 Birthday party in our house, with a group of friends including his best friends. During the evening his very best friend stroked one of the girls thighs, she said ‘no’ and he did it again laughing. Then this friend moved on to one of his close friends girlfriend when he was out of the room. He stroked her thigh, said he was jealous and said you need more vodka. The next morning he sent a message to one of the girls saying “I am……..if I offended you”. No apology.
He then went to school and told a very toned down version to one of the friends that didn’t go but then when he spoke to the girl’s boyfriend and my son professed not to remember anything about the night.
He did write a letter to the boyfriend asking him to apologise to the girl for him.
The group of lads blocked him on all social media.
I was very good friends with the boys mum as my son and her son grew up together as best friends. Shortly after my mum died I popped in to see her but it became apparent that she and her family were very angry and upset in the way her son had been treated by the group. I told her what had happened but she thought it was all ridiculous. She told me that she had told her son that his friends had shown their true colours and were never his real friends!
We smoothed it over and I thought we were still friends. Several months have gone by and I invited my friend for coffee but yesterday she sent me a message saying she can no longer be my friend because she feels it’s a betrayal to her son but in social situations she will be polite and courteous towards me to prevent any awkwardness. I said that I feel a bit the same way and understand where she is coming from but that there are two sides to every story.
I can’t help but feel that she is condoning his behaviour by not being my friend anymore and by telling her son that the boys were never real friends. She obviously feels very sad for her son being isolated from the group. But the boys were shocked by his actions and could no longer trust him.