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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Help me sort this

18 replies

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 22:19

My ds is 13 nearly 14.We have been renovating houses and moving for years but ds has never changed school/friends and we have always been in the same location just different houses.We have been in rented really close to his school (2 mins!)since september but have now seen a house we like which is about 10 mins walk to school but in the opposite direction to his best friend who also lives v close to school in a road where houses are 900k ish!!!!So basically he would be slightly inconvenienced and would need to get a bus home from the skate park which he does atm but would mean an extra 3 or 4 stops.He ahs really lost it and says we need to stay here where we can't afford a house with out a big mortgage.New house is lovely mortgage free and dp and I love it.We stayed in this area to get him into the best school even though it cleaned us out financially and now we can move literally 5 mins away he has kicked off and really taken the shine off our excitement.I want to talk to him about this without a row but how do i explain to him that its not all about him anymore and we want a bit of a life?He only has 2 more years at his secondary school and will then go to college which is across teh road virtually from teh new house but he doesn't see thsi Bloody teenagers!

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CarGirl · 24/04/2008 22:20

He's upset, he's hormonal, he prefers his current location, it's not really a big deal - he'll get over it.

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 22:29

I am realising how spoiled he is tbh.He can be sweet at times but this is ridiculous.Making a bad atmosphere in teh house about this

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CarGirl · 24/04/2008 22:39

Give him 48 hours to get used to it and then "have words" about how bat attitude can lead to loss of services such as lifts etc.

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 22:56

That sounds a good idea.He is trying to make us feel guilty for moving out of the roads he likes !!

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CarGirl · 24/04/2008 23:01

Ask him how he would like to contribute to the large mortgage so you can stay

How much can he go out and earn, buy his own clothes etc

time for some lessons on real life finances??

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 23:13

.

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gagarin · 24/04/2008 23:15

Teenagers are 100% self-centred. He can't help it. Just do it and he'll learn to live with it.

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 23:26

He is so self centred thats for sure.Has gone to bed in a huff We haven't even put an offer in yet and he refused to come and see it even though he ahd a day off today.Will let teh dust settle and then just ignore his tantrums!

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soapbox · 24/04/2008 23:31

I think that some people cope better with change than others. He will most likely come round to the idea as he gets used to it, but just needs some time to adjust.

Of course he is selfish - I thought that was synonymous with teenager

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 23:33

He wants to move and is not bothered about change he just wants to stay in a small selection of streets that he like and where houses are 500k at least

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fireflytoo · 24/04/2008 23:34

I see your point and sympathise but maybe he is just fedup with moving house (as you seem to like doing?).

noddyholder · 24/04/2008 23:37

No it isn't that!He loves moving and wants to move as we are in a small flat and he can't have much in his room etc.He is used to a bit of a charmed life if I am honest endless sleepovers parties etc etc and is thoroughly spoiled.I don't particularly like it but it was a brilliant way toearn enough to be mortgage free and have sufficient savings to fund his university should he choose to go.

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Starmummy · 28/04/2008 15:56

Tell him he really pees you off then you'll move abroad, ergo no friends and a new language. He can speak to my DS who would tell him 4 bus stops how lucky are you. Everywhere we go is a 30 min drive and no buses. so mum has to stay at the skate park!

Just kidding, I know its not the right way to handle it but he will come round, cant you do a bus journey on the pretext of something else so it doesnt seem too much. Call othere mums to advise that another 10 mins isnt life or death from their end. And who knows what happens when you move maybe just maybe something good, always got to be open minded.

Good luck

noddyholder · 28/04/2008 15:58

He has stopped moaning for now!It is not even a bus journey tbh he can walk there from school in 5 mins Now we just need them to accept our offer!

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CarGirl · 28/04/2008 16:43

Great that he's stopped moaning, did you have to threaten him or did he just come around?

noddyholder · 28/04/2008 16:54

We showed him a map and he felt so silly when he swa it.He is planning to go to the college opposite it when he finishes gcses so will be even closer.He has been very meek after his silly outburst

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CarGirl · 28/04/2008 16:59

snort - revenge is sweet when you have teens! Think if the teasing opportunities in years to come!

noddyholder · 28/04/2008 17:01

It is also his birthday this week so he has other things to think about such as will he get teh camera he wants!So best to keep quiet

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