Teen on holiday question

[Spanielmom]

Sounds a weird one but I’m taking my 17 year old son to Icmeler in Turkey for a holiday next month and he’s asked me if we can do the ferry trip to Rhodes for the day to meet up with a girl he’s been chatting to online for a good few months. She’s definitely real, I’ve seen her on FaceTime and she’s the same age and she asked if we wanted her to show us round the sites while we were there.
all very nice but my son actually wants to go off for a few hours for coffee maybe lunch to spend some time just him and her. They’re not bf and gf by the way. Just friends.
I just don’t know how I feel about it. He’s a sensible kid just pretty quiet, not your typical 17 y/o. What are your thoughts. Am I being over protective?
you hear some scary stories that’s all and being in a different country makes it worse for me. Any advice will be welcome

Op I think @sashh has a good idea, maybe ask if her mum or dad could come too? You'd be on more of an equal footing and as you say you can get the measure of things more before leaving them to it for a while. If that idea isn't feasible then Life360 and spending some time with her first is a good plan.

Dd is only 13 and I don't have a son so I'm not sure what the usual thing is for boys your ds's age, but I get the anxiety about safety. It's a foreign country, an online friend you don't know irl and it's extra worrying when you hear of young people being spiked or trafficked or something terrible in the news these days. You know your son best op, two 17 year olds can be wildly different, go with your gut x

I have a Covid kid, they are absolutely real. She is coming out of it now but she has absolutely suffered socially and still has panic attacks.

I would let your son go off for an hour or two with this girl, I think it’s a very low risk thing to do.

If I were in your shoes I would allow this. If you have 'met' her online, trust your son, and plan to go there with him and even meet the girl, then I think the risks are much, much lower. I might insist on getting the parents' number and send a friendly text, "I hear our son and daughter are meeting today, here is my name/number if you have any concerns". I often do this when my teen is meeting new people and he doesn't seem fazed by it.
This seems like a fun opportunity for your son TBH, and it's lovely that you are included. Kids at his age are doing a lot worse!!

I have a Covid kid, they are absolutely real.

No it isn't.

I hope you don't use that label in front of her.

In a sea of posts where teens are being rude, evasive or tricky yours sounds like a wonderful travel companion. But he is 17 and even if shy and quiet needs to learn how to navigate life and the less he does now the harder the next decade is. This is brilliant. Different, and a bit of a challenge. You know she exists, it’s a safe place and you can, if you must, say hi at the start then leave him to it. Let his self image build so he is the arranger, the planner and the doer. He sounds fabulous and is communicating really well with you but that brings its own dangers of over dependence so I would explore my own anxiety - it’s understandable - and let him lead. He needs to for his own growth.