DS17 skipping school to go to Wireless festival

[TheGander]

He casually announced yesterday that he’s going as his girlfriend and her mates are going. I have explained that it’s an unauthorised absence, which his school is going to take very seriously and that I won’t lie for him. He’s still going. Looking at the website isn’t reassuring me, the mood seems to be very Gangsta ( so flame me). Would be interested to hear from other parents who have faced similar and I’ll update on how it works out, My concerns are 2 fold, security and the fallout from the school. We live in south London so it’s all doable on the tube.

? At 17 it’s not the same as the typical unauthorised absence as he is in post 16 education. It’s not serious at all. Colleges and sixth forms can’t fine parents and there are no repercussions for absences. All that matters is the grades you get for the qualifications’ coursework and/or exams.

So he’s 17, presumably has no crucial national exams this academic year, and will have finished any internal school based exams. All important work will have been completed surely? And the festival is from the 12th to the 14th - so only one weekday will be affected? Unless he boards and should be in school on Saturday?

I can’t quite see what sort of ‘fallout’ the school would have up its sleeve for one day at the very end of the academic year?

Can’t comment on the actual nature of the festival - though I guess even ‘gangstas’ have mothers too.

Thanks for the replies they are helpful. He does say they are not doing much at school. I’m sure they’ll want to look stern about it so I just have to wait and hear from them. Will update.

He's 17. I doubt the school will mind that much unless he's missing an exam (unlikely as surely they're all done for this year).
The only thing his form tutor will probably say is "So how was Wireless? Did you enjoy it?"(and then start telling him about when they went to Glasto in the 90s)

Yes exactly this. I am surprised at 17 they haven’t broken up for summer yet anyway.

They all act like absences are treated the same, but they’re not as the legal teeth aren’t there. The only thing the school can do is call you if the absences become persistent and say it’s a safeguarding concern and ask to have a meeting with you. If your DS is both persistently absent and failing the courses, then they can move to ask him to leave the college/sixth form.

There won’t be any fallout from missing one day.

He does need to call/log in and tell the school he will be absent that day so they don’t assume he was kidnapped or killed on the commute in.

He'll be missing one day right at the end of term. Presumably he's not going to be missing any exams. Unless he's had particularly poor attendance I'd allow it.

I can't really comment on the safety/security of that particular festival as I've never been. But it's a big, professionally organised one that's been running for a number of years so it wouldn't raise any particular alarm bells for me. And as it's just a tube ride away that's even better.

I doubt the school will care at 17 and no exams. It seems you are horrified that your son wants to slum it at some common festival 😂

You might have a point Mrs Jayy. It’s not my kind of music ( but I suppose that’s probably partly the attraction). He’s done his mocks, but I’m assuming the school will want to project a certain strictness about it. I have called the school @SummerFeverVenice . What annoyed me is he wanted to tel them he was unwell, I’ve told them the truth, we’ll see how it plays out.

i don't know why you called the school, tbh. I'd have just told him you wouldn't lie and then just responded to their enquiries.

at 17 you have to let them make their own mistakes.

17 right at the end of the school year? I would just let him go and he can deal with any consequences from school

Wow. As if you called the school.

I had friends with parents like you. It didn't turn out well.

I'd be objecting on the grounds of how ridiculous woke it is! They're clamping down on a random list of 'cultural appropriations' apparently, tho I bet they're fine with a keffiyeh..... there was an article in the times today.

Also, you can't even take WATER in as they want the ability to utterly fleece the kids once inside.

I wouldn't worry about the day off sixth form.

at 17 I left mine to their own devices, in fact thinking about it I would never have known if they didn't go to college at all!

Life is short let him live a bit.

A lot of my dd's friends went last year and all was well, they were also 6th form age. (She didn't because she doesn't like big crowds.)

Two minutes looking at the event's website shows that while you can't take in bottled drinks, you can bring in food, and you can bring in empty water bottles that you can fill on-site for free. So you could easily keep yourself fed and watered without having to pay a penny to the vendors.

You really shouldn't just believe whatever you read in The Times without checking. It can easily leave you sounding foolish. Maybe even more foolish than your use of the word "woke" as a pejorative.

How is it any different to any other holiday ?

Woke? What do you mean by that ? You know 17 year olds that have different "values" to you Isn't as rare as you think. These places have free water they just don't want kids smuggling in vodka and the no drinks policy covers that.

"Project a certain strictness"

Really? The school won't give two shits. Why on earth did you ring them? Snitch 🤣

I can´t believe you called the school. How ridiculous.

Are kids less independent these days or is this thread weird? I say good for them! At 17 this is all part of living life. Hope they have the best time.

When I was 17 I was in Ibiza instead of at college 🤷‍♀️ best experience ever!!

Ok here’s the update as promised. He couldn’t find his passport, I wasn’t at home and didn’t have my phone so couldn’t tell him where it was. He ended up not going and went to school. I think he was in 2 minds about it as he wasn’t too keen on the lineup but feels he’s let his GF down. It was useful to have peoples views so I can gauge my attitude towards similar situations if they happen again.

Ah that's a shame. Sounds like he took you saying they'd view it strictly and seriously to heart and it put him off.

You're really concerned about his safety at the event but left him to it and buggered off without your phone? Or was that done intentionally?

Do they not authorise their own absences at 17?