My dd (15) has a dear sweet friend or at least did have. They are part of a larger mixed age friendship group and among the group there are some SO relationships.
The dear sweet friend recently had a birthday event which dd could not attend due to work commitments.
The following day a number of the group including dear sweet girl went out together but dd was not invited. And worse still was lied to about it. However they posted pics which were clearly seen and caused great distress. She was however not the only one not asked but she was the only one lied to.
Dear sweet girl is in a same sex relationship with an older girl in the group. When asked why dd was not included she was told because they were 'all' angry with her for not attending birthday event which had been organised by gf. At this point I spoke to friend and she too was very upset and was keen to sort things. Later the same day dd received messages from friends phone but from the gf. Apparently friend was napping and gf had checked phone ..... red flag I feel.
Gf told dd she has been a very bad friend and they were all sick of her and finished with her. Dd is not a bad friend and is actually a very caring soul and doesn't let anyone down and there for all!
Fast forward 3 days to prom. During prom sweet girl and others from the group did speak to dd but kept separate in the main. There was 1 part of the evening when sweet girl was left unattended, she approached dd and said she needed a hug and that 'this never happened ' another red flag. Dd suggested to sweet girl that she was not bring allowed contact with dd rather than it being her choice. She wholeheartedly agreed. Dd said perhaps gf is not the right person!!! And then the 'minders' reappeared! Sweet friend was lead away and seemingly had a strong word with.
I did taxi collection and on the way spotted gf hovering near the gates in the dark.
A few came to ours but apparently the others were opting out of post prom events.
During the festivities pictures from an 'alternative post prom party ' along with a message from sweet girls phone saying she ' should not have given dd false hope and she cannot be forgiven' in language sweet friend just would not use.
I / we are deeply concerned sweet girl is a victim of some sinister control by older gf, and that there is an element of gaslighting too.
Dd wants to tell sweet girls mum but is afraid gf has already got to mum and she will make things worse. Do I message? WWYD?