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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Alienated

5 replies

wildlingtribe · 23/06/2024 07:22

My ex has actively alienated my eldest (14), since the year has past I have had a bereavement, and a terrible family trauma of family members. My eldest doesn't show any emotion to these things. She copies her dad.

She is still disrespectful to me and blocked off my side of the family. This can be selective depending on her mood or if her dad or grandparents say anything nasty again. But my sweet girl has changed so dramatically.

How much of it is teenage.. separation... her personality.... etc. nature/nurture..

From what I know.. a child doesn't naturally choose to completely shut off a parent. Not only a parent but the parent who hasn't ever let her down. Has always been devoted and continues to do so.

It's so hard keeping boundaries as she's not broken our trust, I'm also called bipolar if I try to keep boundaries (ie; tell her it's unacceptable to speak to me rudely)

OP posts:
CadyEastman · 23/06/2024 14:16

Sorry OP it's not clear from your post who your DD lives with?

Emiliania · 23/06/2024 14:35

Sending hugs, have had the same, with not just me but all family on my side blocked. Don’t want to say too much here but please know there’s at least one person who knows how hurt and bewildered you must be, as I’m sure you’ll get the usual amount of speculative “well you must have done SOMETHING terrible…” comments. Just keep loving her but look after yourself too x

wildlingtribe · 23/06/2024 22:54

@Emiliania similar really, my whole side of my family shut off too. It was all very abrupt but the pain is awful. A piece of the puzzle is missing and it's hard. I'm sending you love & strength also. I keep showing up for her but I'm mainly met with disrespect. It's hard to stay grounded and not feel attacked when all that seems is apparent is in fact attacks/ghosting or lied to. 💔

OP posts:
wildlingtribe · 23/06/2024 22:56

@CadyEastman Has been in his home with NRC-MIL for a fair few months. Despite my efforts 😓💔

OP posts:
wildlingtribe · 19/04/2025 22:16

@EmilianiaAre you still experiencing this?

OP posts:
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