Lack of friends

[DoesItEverGetEasier]

DS13 doesn't have any physical friends. By that I mean he has classmates he speaks to almost daily while playing Xbox, but they never come around or go out together.

All his friends are girls, not sure if that is part of the problem. He's always had mostly girl friends and can't seem to find anything in common with boys. Although I find it hard to believe there aren't any boys like him in school.

His younger sister is just starting to socialise more and he is always at home alone. I think he wants to go out as he often asks "will he be allowed to...." but these plans never materialise and I feel so sorry for him. Here we are at the end of another school holidays without going anywhere.

Anyone been through this? How did it turn out? Any advice? I've tried encouraging extra curricular activities but that is a challenge as he doesn't have any hobbies either.

It’s hard.

My youngest is the same age and does have a group of friends (went to a different secondary to most of his old primary class) but sometimes they don’t go out for weeks at a time, and other weeks they go out a lot. They do seem a bit flaky tbh but I think that’s just 13 year old boys!

Also, my son is the youngest but a lot of his friends seem to be the eldests and I think that makes a difference in what they are allowed to do. The parents (who I don’t know) seem to still organise quite a lot of the social plans.

Kids mainly socialize online these days. So there's that.
How about after school activities? Does he do any sports or arts?

He’s got to chuck himself in to hobbies in and out school.

This has been a life saver for my 11 year old.

DD13 very seldom have friends over or go out with them either. I think she has friends because she has a birthday party to go to this month, and also she had a few girls over for her birthday. But she doesn't socialise much and she hasn't met up with anyone this half term. I don't know if she has someone to sit with at break and lunch time either because she talks about others being in various school clubs.

I just have to relax and not worry. I can't do anything about it anyway.

Thanks everyone, I've since found out that he has been asked to go out this week but he's made excuses so I think there's more going on than I first thought. Still clueless as to what to do about it.

He doesn't really have any hobbies, begrudgingly goes to couple of classes a week but has no enthusiasm for them and will try to get out of them if he can.

My 13 year old if the same. He’s happy though so it doesn’t matter. He talks to kids at school and they message and game together at home but rarely go out.

@Neodymium problem is he doesn't seem happy at all, very miserable in fact, can barely get him to speak in the house. I just know he's going through something at the moment but don't really know what or how I can help! 😢

Wrong thread sorry!