DD14 concerning weight gain

[Fee561]

Took DD14 to the GP for an ear infection. He weighed her and she was 14 stone. I knew she'd gotten bigger in the past couple of years, but I didn't realise it was this bad. Both me and her dad are a healthy weight and always have been. She weighs more than both of us. DS12 is slim too. Her activity levels used to be good but she's pretty inactive now. I try to get her to exercise, but she either refuses or gives up quickly because she's getting out of breath. We've stopped buying crisps and chocolate and other treats. DS isn't too happy about it, but he understands.

The first appointment was 6 months ago. Took her back to the GP the other day because I was certain she'd gained weight and she's been wetting the bed more frequently than she used to. She's also wet herself during the day a few times recently. Her clothes are fitting tighter and I found lots of junk food wrappers under her bed and in her desk drawer. We don't buy junk food anymore. Unfortunately, I was correct. She's 15st 5lbs. If she carries on at this rate, she'll be well over 16st by the end of the year. The family have made changes, but she's resistant to it. I'm so worried for her health. Because of her accidents and weight, he took bloods to check her hba1c in case she's developing t2 diabetes. We should get the results tomorrow.

It sounds like you need a referral to a specialist service.

There’s lots of healthy eating and exercise advice people can give you, but you need support and you daughter will need professional support as it sounds like she has a binge eating disorder.

It’s good your GP is checking her out, but do ask him for a swift referral to an adolescent weight management programme. In the meantime I would persist with the family healthy eating, do what you can to minimise junk food, and join her in some exercise she can tolerate, maybe swimming?

She must be nearly 15 by now - so it might be useful for her to go in to see the GP on her own to discuss this and any concerns she has.

I think the really key thing is if she is ready to manage this situation and that she makes the choices around it.

I think you should offer her this option - it may be she wants your support or she might prefer to talk to a GP on her own about options available for her.

Managing her weight at this age needs to come from her. Whilst you are important as a support, I don't think you should be driving this.

You and your husband combined are less than 14 stone?

Wetting herself in the day maybe related to her bit wanting get up and go to the toilet because she is self conscious.

Typos I have burns on my fingers!

No, I'm 9 st and he's 12 st. She used to wet herself once every few months on average, still more than typical for an older child. Recently, it's been at least once a week. She's always been a bedwetter, but we have had help with this and it reduced to once or so a month once she was 12ish. Now it's gone back up to most nights. Waking up in a wet bed really disrupts her sleep.

I'd want to check for any medical reasons for the weight gain, so check bloods and a full health check.

Some pituitary tumours can cause weight gain as can thyroid or hormone imbalances.

That was me, only without the bed wetting and junk food. Definitely check under active thyroid and lipoedema. Nothing worse than being told you have to lose weight or you will die when you are a child and the adults are already restricting your food. And I'm still not dead forty years on.

Has she been tested for Polycystic Ovaries? My DD gained a lot of weight due to that as a teenager.

Have you spoken to her to ask why she’s binge eating junk food?! Is she comfort eating due to bullying etc… finding out the underlying problem is key, gaining 1.5 stone in 6months isn’t just a chocolate bar here and there. Also, does she get out and socialise or is she a teen that sits in bed all day (when not at school) boredom could be a factor if she is not filling her time with anything other than tv and social media.

Maybe there's an underlying reason she's eating more? If she's hidden wrappers it could be binge eating which could be from a mental health issue. Maybe seek counselling at school so she can discuss how she feels. It's such a tricky age for girls.

The bedwetting and binge eating could be caused by a variety of underlying factors, such as depression, being assaulted, bullying, family dynamics, health issues, or a combination. It might help to have a conversation with her or suggest therapy.

Once children become independent and no longer rely on you for meals, there's little control over their eating habits.

You may not have much influence over her weight management, as she can access food independently.

It's her responsibility to address her weight and other issues, as she knows where to seek help if needed.

Constant criticism only worsens the situation. Instead, consider suggesting therapy, peer support groups, or counseling and offering support.

Deleting this post might prevent her from coming across it, potentially making things worse.

I genuinely hope things get better for her.

Is she being bullied at school? Is she using food for comfort?

Is the GP aware that she regularly wets herself @Fee561?

How is she apart from the accidents and the food? Does she have a social life or any activities that she goes to?

Does she have friends and is she studying and coping with schoolwork?

Have you made any progress OP?

???

@Fee561
Any updates? Hope the tests were clear for diabetes