DC ex trying to friend me on SM

[darksideofthestudio]

My DD is going through a tough time, started chatting to a boy in her year, started going out but she ended it after a couple of weeks due to him ghosting her. Unbeknown to her, he has accessed her phone, seen private saved conversations between her and her best friend and has now apparently shared this with others. My DD and her best friend have fallen out and the consequences are awful, with DD being ignored by her closest friends and not wanting to go to school (Y10). This lad is trying to add me on SM, I have since blocked him on everything (last attempt to add me was this evening). School have been informed and I’m trying to let her deal with it whilst providing lots of reassurance and support but it’s ongoing. DD has apologised, repeatedly, for leaving her phone unattended but it’s seemingly not enough and this lad is constantly adding fuel to the fire. Attempting to add me on SM tonight, yet again, demonstrates that he’s not finished yet. All seems so ridiculously immature and dramatic, but also incredibly sad. Any experience or words of wisdom fellow MN’s?

I'd focus on trying to repair the relationship between your dd and her best friend.

This lad trying to add me on any social media wouldn't really bother me. Close your accounts if you're that bothered about him being a twat.

Your daughter shouldn't have to apologise for leaving her phone unattended, it's not a new born baby. The problem isn't her leaving her phone unattended, it's that she was going out with an idiot. It's all too much too soon.

I'd report the little shit to the police for harassment.

Are you sure you’re getting the full story from your DD? Is it possible he might be trying to contact you because he’s worried about her or has something important to say about the situation etc? 14/15 year old lads aren’t usually keen to get their ex’s mum involved, especially if they’re supposed to be the troublemaker in the situation.

This

I think he wants to tell you something your DD has said or done as some kind of revenge?
I don't know. I might be wrong.
Add the little shit and see what he says.....you can just instantly block him after.

Thanks all, much appreciated. My DD has shown me the messages between her and her best friend and I don’t doubt her for one second. She thinks this lad is trying to access photos of her to embarrass and humiliate her as he has a lot of form for this. Thankfully my social media accounts are locked down, and I generally don’t post photos of my DD (a few cute ones from when she was three maybe). I just can’t get my head around how this lad has caused so much trouble, and I’m not bothered about him trying to add me, it’s the fact that he seems determined to humiliate my DD and alienate her from her friendship circle by spreading malicious lies about things she supposedly said when they spent time together.

His obsession with your daughter is worrying and escalating. Have you considered reporting this harassment to the police in case it escalates to violence?

His behaviour is really concerning. Going through her phone, isolating her from friends, trying to add you on sm. He sounds obsessed. I would speak to the school and let them know of it continues you will be getting advice from the police. This behaviour will escalate if its not stopped now. Have you checked your message requests to see if he's tried to send you anything?

I would actually message him and ask why he's trying to contact you.

These are the fears that are starting to enter my mind. I will report, this needs to stop. My DD is worried about being called a snitch, an awful stigma that still exists within schools but I think caution is now needed.

Find out what he wants and if he's nasty or inappropriate you have further evidence to report him for harassment or leverage to make him stop if he makes threats etc