Curfew at 17?

[Rosebel]

At what age did you stop having curfews for your teenagers? My 15 year old still has a 10pm curfew but 17 year old doesn't. DH thinks she should be in by 11 latest but she's doing an apprenticeship and pays rent, plus she is 18 in two months. She gets up for work and is on time and tbf is rarely home later than 11:30.
Just wondering if a curfew is still normal at 17 (I didn't have one).

[Medschoolmum]

We never had a curfew at any age, just an agreement that she needed to keep me informed about where she was and to have an agreed plan for getting home safely.

[Daffodilsarentfluffy]

I didn't live at home at 17 but my dc who have /do are expected in at a certain time.. My house my rules. That being I deserve more than going to bed not knowing where they are... So IF they have a lift organised that's fine. Dd when 17 was occasionally 12 after a gig.. Dd17 gets home at 9.18 as that's when the bus arrives from her bf's house... Sometimes 10. 18 if pre discussed... Trawling the streets ds15 is 9pm...

[PontiacFirebird]

i think you decide based on previous behaviour, kind of. So, current dc that age doesn’t have a curfew exactly, because they tend to hang out in a big group of mates, at various houses, and I am more bothered about them walking home to our end of town with someone than having to leave at a set time.
However if a lift is going to be needed then I would say not after 1 am on a weekend night and 11 on a weeknight (cos I want to go to bed) I also ask for text updates on plans and can’t really sleep if they are out ( although my parents definitely did when I was out til 3am!)
So far it’s been ok, fully expecting a few anxious very late nights though, par for the course.

[floppybit]

No curfew at 17 for mine. She sounds very responsible

[SirChenjins]

Mine has just turned 17 and still at school so 9.30 ish on a school night, midnight at the weekend although he’s rarely out that late. He’s doesn’t seem to want to go far from home so they tend to go to each other’s houses or play footy and then he likes to come home to play Xbox for a bit.

[MaloneMeadow]

We’ve never had a curfew. I don’t see why it’s necessary? As long as DD is safe, communicates with me and is home for a reasonable time on a school night then I see no issue. I don’t exactly enjoy playing taxi driver at 1am but that’s part of parenting teenagers and I’d rather she was in the car with me than walking the streets or in a taxi with a strange driver

[oneinamillieon]

my secondary schoolers (16, 15, 15, 12) don't have an official "curfew," i just need to know where they are and who they're with, if they're out too late i'll just ring them and ask them to be on their way home. 12yo usually doesn't stay out long when she goes out, i usually ask my 16yo and 15yos home at about half past 10 depending on where they are.

[EmilyPlay]

She works and pays rent so should be treated like an adult with no curfew.

[BrightAsALemon]

It sounds like without a curfew she's coming home most of the time before 11:30 anyway - if you're happy with that I'd say best not to enforce a curfew incase it goes down the wrong way.

Instead, you could try making sure that if she plans to be home later than 11:30 (her average home time and 30 mins later than the curfew your DH wants to set) she could send you a text to let you know.

18 might be a bit different with the ability to go out and drink, so setting this text communication expectation up could be good for nights where she plans to go out-out

[ThinkingAgainAndAgain]

I always thought of my parents as fairly strict. But maybe not! I only ever went out out on a Saturday night (not every Saturday night, maybe once every three weeks on average) and I had to be home within half an hour a nightclub closing, which was at 2am.

if I was out out on a weeknight, which was only ever in school holidays, I had to be in by midnight.

[171513mum]

@Medschoolmum

We never had a curfew at any age, just an agreement that she needed to keep me informed about where she was and to have an agreed plan for getting home safely.

Exactly this. There's no set curfew but I always know more or less where they are and when/how they're coming home. It wouldn't occur to my kids to go out wandering the streets without telling me where they were going. They'd either be at an event eg concert etc or at someone's house. I've never understood teens being allowed to just wander around/hang around a park.
If they're coming back late (until dd17 learned to drive) I'd be picking them up anyway. I wouldn't be happy with them getting public transport or walking home late on their own.