My son is 13 and in Year 8. He’s one of the older ones in the year and has always been very mature. He’s very arty and creative and up until secondary school he has always been happy at school. He had a wide range of friends at primary school, including a lot of girls, so the jump to an all boys secondary school has been a bit of a shock, as he’s not a loud/footbally boy and he’s struggled to make friends. He’s quite sensitive and quirky. He has a large group of friends outside of school (mainly older than him) but no real friends within school.
He’s never quite settled into secondary school - always asking to move. Things came to a head last night when he suddenly burst into tears and said he couldn’t go to school anymore - when questioned he told me that a group of boys in his class has been picking on him/bullying him. They have been making comments about the clothes he wore on mufti day (he wears baggy skater jeans and retro t-shirts and a huge oversized leather jacket - it’s his ‘look’ but definitely not mainstream fashion) - he said they’ve been making comments about his looks and his hair (which is quite long)
He is very tall and skinny and he said that when he got changed for PE they were all commenting on this too and asking if he had an eating disorder.
He confided last night that since this started a few weeks ago he has been avoiding seeing them in the canteen so therefore not eating his lunch. He’s just been walking the corridors at break time.
I also noticed that he has cut marks on his wrist which he said he has done but he wouldn’t tell me when.
I’m just feeling a bit lost and helpless - he says he hates himself, he’s ugly and he’s got no future.
Any guidance would be much appreciated. I think I should talk to school but my son doesn’t want me to.
Thank you x