Hello ,
my DD is 16 and seems a bit sad and lost, I’m worried about her but feel a bit lost and helpless so I’ll give a bit of background, she has not really enjoyed high school , first two years in covid disruptions , a friendship group change which she says has left her feeling let down by old friends , she’s now hanging about with a new group who she seems to enjoy being with and seems like nice kids if a bit lost and wild?
this coincides with her losing focus at school, very fixed negative mindset “ what’s the point “ and “ i don’t care “ attitude.
I feel she’s lost her self confidence and doesn’t know where she fits. She’s quite hostile and rude at home but we do call her on it and she’ll usually apologise and pull it together briefly before the next bout .
I have said to her that she’s loved unconditionally but she is the only one who can change things for the better , we don’t want her to give up on herself at this young age but also recognise that she may need to make these choices in order to find out what she doesn’t want if that makes sense ?
we will never give up on her but we need to take a step away as the conflict at home is awful and if she’s unhappy in other parts of her life I want home to be a safe space.
which brings me to the perspective bit, I’ve noticed a smell of weed in her bedroom ( second time - first time I told her under no circumstances was she to have it in the house , as well as “ think of your health , make good choices etc )
my heart sank this morning at the thought of more conflict but also I found myself thinking, it’s better than other harder drugs and pick your battles ?
I’m just a bit worn down so could do with other perspectives?