Friday night fail..every week

[BibbleandSqwauk]

Ugh. Single parent. Kids 14 and 12. Every Friday night we discuss a film or game and I go and buy sweet and savoury snacks, dinner usually is pizza or fish and chips. Every week, someone changes their mind about what to watch or play, or pisses off the other one, someone strops off upstairs, one, two or three of us end up in tears. Every week. Both of them have so little flexibility and neither give a shit about what I might actually want to do after a long week at work. Unless it goes exactly their way they ruin it. Why do I keep trying? 😥

Stop trying to do stuff together on a Friday. Everyone is knackered and not in the best mode to compromise. They just want to flop with their own choice. Try for family time on a Sunday eve instead.

You pick a film you want to watch (that would be suitable for them to watch too), buy whatever snacks/food you want (but stuff they will eat too) and they have 2 choices -
1 sit and watch film with you and eat with you
or
2 - eat in the kitchen and then find something to do in their rooms.
Only rule - they don't harass/annoy you while you are watching.

I can relate to this! I have recently related to reality shows as they will both watch the same ones.

Thanks. I like the suggestion that Friday is the wrong night to pick. They are opposite sex and very different so really hard to find anything they both like and they're really really bad at accommodating the other or taking turns. I've been an SP since they were toddlers and rarely managed to properly parent both..one at a time yes.

Same happened here when we tried to watch Love Actually over Xmas! Got the sofa bed out, bought the snacks they wanted etc. Didn’t last 20 minutes. One of them was annoying the other by “breathing funny” , the other one was hogging the blanket, both kept going on their phones… I miss the days we could spend hours binge watching Mako Mermaids 😞

Yeah. Don't know when but not Friday

Oh god same, I am useless at parenting two children with opinions at the same time.

I find Sunday night better for films or a series (they both liked Young Sheldon and they like Outnumbered), and Saturdays we’ve just started watching Saturday night type TV (like Michael McIntyre). The eldest will often only come down for an hour at best too!

It’s hard. And I’m not a single parent!

I have 5 years between my 3 children and it’s hard to please all of them. Plus they don’t seem to watch actual Tv or even films tbh.

What about a game? I know that has it’s own issues but we had success at Christmas with the herd mentality game.

Glad, but also sorry I'm not alone. There's loads I can watch with my DD, we've worked our way through lots of box sets, but far fewer with ds and none that she will tolerate. Even Young Sheldon is one not the other, Big Bang theory is the other one...honestly it's so frustrating!

Oh its hard op. I have children who are really different in personality and it usually ends in tears when we try things like this.

I think the option of multiple screens jusr means kids are spoilt for choice sadly.

Not sure of the answer but definitely dont feel bad. And they are knackered as well.

We were talking about this yesterday, my kids are a bit younger but have all been enjoying the new gladiators. Me and DH are both in our 40s and were reminiscing about watching Saturday evening Tv like that and blind date and what have you with our families. But there wasn't any tv choice really and no phones or internet then, so it was so much easier to all just do the same thing.

These days there are so many options, it takes half the night for me and DH to choose a film, never mind involving the kids, and by the time you put it on half the time you've lost interest!

We take turns in rotation so it's only one person choosing each week so no arguments. If one child really doesn't want to watch it/play it then they can do something else. At least on weeks I choose, I can select something I think they might enjoy but no one gets to complain or argue about choices. We have reminders set on Alexa to avoid the arguments about whose turn it is too. We do Saturday nights.

We tried the rota but they're just not prepared to watch the others' choice. Gladiators has actually gone down well that's true.

We have just watched 3 episodes of Gogglesprogs which was chosen by both 13 and 15 year old AND they both stayed down for them all without going off to bedrooms. Very random and would not have been something I would have chosen but it went down very well. But yeah, I hear you, friday nights are usually a write off.

Agree with the Saturday night telly thing, I’m loving the Gladiators/Michael McIntyre thing, it feels like the 90s again. We’ve taken tu having tea in front of the telly on Saturdays now as it’s the only way we can get eldest child to sit in the living room with us!
we also used to do family game night where everyone got to choose a game (board/video/cards) and everyone had to join in, but online gaming with friends is apparently a lot more fun these days 😁

This is a classic example of ‘organised fun’

whikst isnr fun at all

maybe just plan more spontaneously- my kids would also just want to chill in their rooms having been in school all week

what if they just don’t fancy a film? there’s loads of times i can’t find a film i really want to watch - choosing one every week for routine would bore me too

Must try Gladiators. Mine love The Apprentice, and that’s just started on a Thursday so is a Friday option on catch up?

We've been watching Gladiators on a Friday night (the previous week's episode) and both teen DS and pre-teen DD are loving it. DS was not keen at all before it started so I bribed him with ice cream.

I think because it's only an hour it works better than a film as they still have plenty of time to do their own thing.

What about split nights… Friday night is your night, you watch what you want, what you want etc. Saturday night with DD & Sunday night with DS, if the other child wants to join the night that’s up to them but they cannot dictate what the other one watches and vice versa, then you don’t have to ‘parent’ them together as they both get quality special time with you 👍🏽😊

The 14yr old will want to go to their room more often.

Does a 14yr old really want to play a board game with their mother??

I wonder are you are pushing too hard to keep this 'movie night' tradition going.

It sounds more suitable for younger children.

If you are in tears over it, that's going to be distressing for them. Do you get upset because things aren't going to your plan?

It sounds like a lot of pressure is being created somewhere.

Let each child take turns choosing the takeaway food. Then just leave it at that.