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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

SLT lead failed on SEN provisions, failed reporting safeguarding emergency, 9 months waiting for a toilet pass

16 replies

Jram02 · 01/02/2024 20:36

My child is in year 8 and currently signed off by Gp.
They have been mistreated from SLT lead. Legal advice is pointing towards a discrimination case.
List of wrong doing :
Failed to report my childs self harm whilst in school to safeguard lead. Goveners, PRT , EH & academy trust have acknowledged it. Safeguarding had to change whole school policy around it.
Failed to provide SEN provisions for my child as it turned out we had a distant family connection to SEN lead. SEN lead admitted infront of professionals that she had been avoiding my child, because of a connection at TAC meeting. I have never had a invite to a review or had any paper work for SEN needs since starting in yr7. Goveners/ academy trust acknowledge this.
My child has stress incontinence, it took 9 months to receive a toilet pass after been promised it. Goveners/ academy trust acknowledged this.
GDRP rules been breeched by teacher to another student about my child.
There's been plenty of other minor things, but pointless to mention as bigger fails more important to deal with.
Child has been through ladder of local offer I.e. BOSS, Ed phycologist, various other strategies but always refused ECH assessment and EBSA.
Ed phycologist report was really good and put forward a whole new way school had to deal with my child. Proved that my childs disruptive behavior in class was not a CHOICE ,(the termonallgy the SLT lead always used with my child)but as Ed phycologist said it was because of intense emotional arousal. My child was in fight/flight mode every time they enter school grounds or talks about school.
My child got excluded 15 days last term due to SLT removal as my child tried anything to get out of the work as they wouldn't supply appropriate work for academic age (age 7 years 11 months in core subjects).
Went to Goveners Disciplinary hearing, unfortunately cause the Ed phycologist report wasn't received till after the15 days exclusions had happened, they couldn't take it in to consideration to uplift the exclusions, but I was pleased meeting went ahead as got a chance to say the child's voice for once.
Whilst waiting for meeting there was a point of contact for both us and the school, which was one of the leads at the academy trust (SLT leadership's manager) , but again school breeched this several times and made out the provision was in place for our family and not them. They soon got put right by this lead at the academy. That poor woman has had to apologise 4 times in the last month on behalf of the school.
Only just got told they was posting hard work copies out to my child after asking a full half term.
EH worker has blamed school of victim blaming my child amongst backing us up on other things.

Gps have signed my child off due to stress incontinence severe and mental health severe.
CAMHS (iapt team) are saying its all schools fault.
PRT agreeing that school has been in the wrong.
Currently waiting for private eCHP plan and diagnosis, children's services have now trained in EBSA so they're putting my child on that pathway so she can access a hospital school.
At home where child feels 100% safe they're mainly calm, normal teenage stuff, but have learnt many domestic tasks in the home.
I have two other younger children missing out on valuable time spent on them and one of them starting to avoid school.
I've had to ask school if they cannot contact me for 24 hours just so I can get my child another drs appointment as stress incontinence has been severe since goveners meeting. School was still emailing at 20:20 last evening and starting again at 7:30 am this morning.
I'm not normally one for posting on forums, but hoping there is someone who might have more knowledge of cases like these or a professional what has experiences in this field. Would also like to know if anyone's experiencing anything similar happened or happening to them.
We as a family are in severe stress at the wrong doing happening to our child currently and just want our child to be able to access a healthy education.

OP posts:
Mumofteens4892 · 01/02/2024 21:39

I didn’t want to read and run but I have been there, and the stress is incredible. My fight ended about 2 years ago and I am still recovering I think! You are fighting a very powerful system - it is “David and Goliath” when parents advocate for their children.

Schools have got their priorities all wrong, and it seems that students’ wellbeing is no longer important :-(

Make sure you all take time out, whenever you can. It is a slog. Good luck 🤞 .

Violet80 · 02/02/2024 11:44

@Jram02 I'm so sorry you've had to go through this and your dc such trauma. I recommend joining a Facebook group called "Not fine in school", it's a private group for parents of children with school issues / attendance / avoidance and many with SEN as well. You will find a lot of support and advice there Flowers

Jram02 · 02/02/2024 13:15

Thankyou so much for your replies and advice. Anything is much appreciated

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Validus · 02/02/2024 13:19

Go with the legal advice. file every complaint you can and also demand (not ask for) communication only between certain times of day. Note to them that harassment is also something you can claim for if they cannot behave. Excessive g communication esp when they’ve been told not to can count if it’s distressing you.

cansu · 04/02/2024 12:00

What does your child actually need? The truth is probably there is plenty of info missed out here. What did your child do that prompted a 15 day exclusion?

cansu · 04/02/2024 12:03

Just read your previous post on your 12 y dd and violence. This is a story with much more to it than you are presenting on this latest thread.

Jram02 · 05/02/2024 09:35

I guess you are a professional

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Singleandproud · 05/02/2024 09:49

What do you want out of this scenario?
You can pursue the legal route which will put additional strain on the family. Do you want your child to remain at this school? It sounds like the family school connection is broken.

If your child has an academic level of 7 years as a 13 year old you really need to be looking at specialist provision. Its incredibly difficult teaching a child that is such an outlier compared to the rest of the class even in a nurture group particularly one that has missed large areas of content. If your child remains in mainstream then they will still have to learn Shakespeare, they will still have to learn about ionic and covalent bonding, about the laws of physics, conservation of energy etc there is only so much differentiation that can be put in place and they will have to do so in a way that allows the other children in the class to achieve too.

You also shouldn't be complaining about how and when school are emailing you, they work to their own schedules to send a thought out response that they can't do during a work day which is early morning and late at night but you are in control of when you read those messages.

I would start taking to the school about moving to a more specialised placement and worrying less about legal action. Your DC is not going to thrive there during the GCSE years

Jram02 · 05/02/2024 13:20

This is why I don't post on these things, I'm taking it down. I cannot be bothered with unhelpful replies

OP posts:
Singleandproud · 05/02/2024 13:28

@Jram02 I wasn't trying to be unhelpful.

What you want out of the process is important. It's going to add incredible stress to what is already a stressful situation.

Do you want to go through the legal process to hold the school accountable for their failings?
Do you want your child to return to that school - are you both going to be happy for them to continue there or would a fresh start be better?

Realistically is a mainstream school going to be able to meet their needs - it sounds like additional support and a more specialised provision would be more appropriate and allow your child to have a more enjoyable experience. Large mainstream schools are busy, loud environments with set curriculums that covers content a child with an intellectual ability of 7 years is going to struggle to access, realistically do you feel the school can provide for your child - even if the govt say that they should provide.

cansu · 05/02/2024 17:58

What you mean is you can't be bothered with people who are pointing out that you are not giving the full story. I can't be bothered to give helpful advice to someone who is not being honest. You will find loads of people piling on telling you the school should be reported to Ofsted etc. Great. But you are cherry picking the parts you want to share.

Jram02 · 06/02/2024 00:43

Rude, hope it never happens to your child. You can think I'm doing what you like, you're no one to me. I've got a lot on I just haven't got time for such negativety put on it

OP posts:
Jram02 · 06/02/2024 00:50

And that was the behavior before why she got these exclusions as there was a whole exploitation case, so you are probably right about me not choosing to want to say about that as ,once again my daughter was a victim of that and its a personal matter . Maybe you should think more before you come to conclusions

OP posts:
KillerTomato7 · 06/02/2024 14:27

Jram02 · 06/02/2024 00:50

And that was the behavior before why she got these exclusions as there was a whole exploitation case, so you are probably right about me not choosing to want to say about that as ,once again my daughter was a victim of that and its a personal matter . Maybe you should think more before you come to conclusions

Edited

Don’t worry about cansu she’s a bit of a troll whose operating assumption is that schools and teachers can do wrong while children and parents are always lying.

cansu · 06/02/2024 18:13

Killertomato7 Actually I am a parent of two children with severe sen and disabilities. I have taken the LA to tribunal three times. But yes please carry on with your nonsense. You seem to have a bit of a chip on your shoulder about teachers. How strange.

Jram02 · 07/02/2024 07:17

No just one

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